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The Parade Square => The Canadian Military => Topic started by: fake penguin on May 10, 2017, 21:01:47

Title: Thank you for your service
Post by: fake penguin on May 10, 2017, 21:01:47
Was reading some responses on how different troops feel about civilians saying to them "thank you for your service." Usually it starts out by a  few veterans saying how they hate it for a few different reasons  followed by a  few civilians getting upset because they  now feels they are being judge by their good jester. Finally other veterans tell the first set of veterans to get over themselves and appreciate the thanks.  Was curious how  people on here feel about it.
Title: Re: Thank you for your service
Post by: mariomike on May 10, 2017, 21:22:20
This article may be relevant to the discussion,

Why Saying “Thank You for Your Service” Offends Some Veterans
http://inmilitary.com/why-saying-thank-you-for-your-service-offends-some-veterans/

Title: Re: Thank you for your service
Post by: jollyjacktar on May 10, 2017, 21:25:14
It makes me uncomfortable inside whenever it happens but I always graciously thank the person for saying it. 
Title: Re: Thank you for your service
Post by: Fishbone Jones on May 10, 2017, 23:26:23
I always respond "Thank you for your support". It is an equitable response and both sides walk away feeling good for a bit.
Title: Re: Thank you for your service
Post by: OldTanker on May 11, 2017, 01:35:43
For me, a simple "thank you". And them saying it doesn't make me uncomfortable at all.
Title: Re: Thank you for your service
Post by: AK on May 11, 2017, 13:04:41
My standard response is "It is an honour to serve". 

Sometimes in the US, I amend it to "It is an honour to serve my Queen".  (I am more and more grateful to have the Queen as our Head of State.  Politicians are so uniformly disappointing.)

But I do like the "Thank you for your support" response as well and I think I'll throw if into the mix for variety.

Cheers,

AK

Title: Re: Thank you for your service
Post by: kev994 on May 11, 2017, 17:25:25
I always respond "Thank you for your support". It is an equitable response and both sides walk away feeling good for a bit.
+1. That's the best I've been able to come up with as well. It comes up a lot in 'merica.
Title: Re: Thank you for your service
Post by: E.R. Campbell on May 12, 2017, 02:43:57
Thanks, recceguy and AK; I'm one of those who, for a whole hockey sock full of reasons, doesn't like be "thanked' for my service, especially not when I think it's a pro-forma sort of thing ... but I don't want to be churlish (that's a relatively new thing, it must come with old age) so your responses will be a help. I think I might try, "Thanks for your support; it was my honour to serve my country and that's all the thanks I deserve."
Title: Re: Thank you for your service
Post by: medicineman on May 12, 2017, 09:25:24
I find it odd that I've never had someone say "Thank you for your service" for the countless hours of volunteer time I did with St John Ambulance in the various communities I've lived in over the years, but get it for doing what was my job.  I too am one of those people that gets uncomfortable and sort of mutters "Well Thanks" or things to that effect and tries to redirect.  I'll keep some of these responses in my back pocket...might have to practice them though  ;D.

MM
Title: Re: Thank you for your service
Post by: Journeyman on May 12, 2017, 09:54:34
"The standard service tip around here is 18%".... and hold out your hand.


Glad I could help.  ;)
Title: Re: Thank you for your service
Post by: jollyjacktar on May 12, 2017, 14:01:29
I have had that said to me now on several visits to the VAC office.  That, really seems strange being trotted out.
Title: Re: Thank you for your service
Post by: Fishbone Jones on May 13, 2017, 02:39:03
I have had that said to me now on several visits to the VAC office.  That, really seems strange being trotted out.

Hah!!! Another of VAC's disingenuous statements!   [:p
Title: Re: Thank you for your service
Post by: Eaglelord17 on May 13, 2017, 07:54:02
I personally don't like it. I also don't like it when people are insistent on trying to do things for you like buy you coffee or food when in uniform. I am not here to satisfy whatever good feeling your getting out of it, and I am already well paid for the work I do. In general I don't like receiving praise, especially when I am just doing a job. I might appreciate the thanks a bit more if I had just done something directly for that person, but otherwise 'thanks for your service' is a excellent example of the mile wide inch deep support we receive.
Title: Re: Thank you for your service
Post by: jollyjacktar on May 13, 2017, 09:36:48
My being creeped out by this recent phenomenon in Canada also stems from too many years of stink eye and Hall sex, so to speak, from civilians because I'm military.  This  "thanks stuff" doesn't ring true to my spidey sense and it just doesn't feel right. 

I remember spending two weeks plus after Hurricane Juan, clearing downed trees etc in Halifax neighbourhoods, nevermind seeing to the welfare of my family who were without power for 15 days.  And hearing of civilians grousing that we'll probably want some thanks afterwards for this.  That, feels more natural to me from Canadians.

It's different in the USA if I'm on a port visit and having to wear whites, for example.  I hear the thanks etc, but the American's come across as genuine, not faddish.  Again, I am gracious and thank them,  but I do let them know I'm not one of their chaps.

I do what I do for my brothers and sisters in uniform and my family. 
Title: Re: Thank you for your service
Post by: GAP on May 13, 2017, 10:16:37
Guys....take it with thanks and appreciation.....it sure beats being spit on and cursed.... :2c:
Title: Re: Thank you for your service
Post by: mariomike on May 13, 2017, 10:33:27
I usually just smile and say hello to women and men in uniform. :)

Title: Re: Thank you for your service
Post by: PPCLI Guy on May 13, 2017, 14:29:45
I usually just smile and say hello to women and men in uniform. :)

When I am in uniform, the women usually smile at me... 8)
Title: Re: Thank you for your service
Post by: Fishbone Jones on May 13, 2017, 15:42:55
There is nothing wrong with a polite reply. I am not the judge of whether their feelings are a mile wide and an inch deep, or visa versa.

For a member to respond otherwise creates conditions for that support to disappear completely. I'm pretty sure if someone, say the GG, decided to buy you a coffee, or say thanks for your service, you'd accept it and respond in kind.

All citizens have equal standing and deserve equal responses.

It costs absolutely nothing to be pleasant and polite, no matter your feelings. Smile say thanks and go home and puke up your bile if you're that inclined to dismiss those, out of hand, that thank you.

Simply my opinion. YMMV.
Title: Re: Thank you for your service
Post by: SeaKingTacco on May 13, 2017, 15:49:31
When I am in uniform, the women usually smile at me... 8)

Well, to paraphrase Red Green: "if the women can find you handsome, they should at least find you funny"

 ;)
Title: Re: Thank you for your service
Post by: jollyjacktar on May 13, 2017, 17:20:16
Guys....take it with thanks and appreciation.....it sure beats being spit on and cursed.... :2c:

I always thank them, say "you're most welcome" and tell them they're very kind to say so.  No need to be a dick, agreed.
Title: Re: Thank you for your service
Post by: dapaterson on May 13, 2017, 18:01:11
I have been known to say "And thank you for your support".
Title: Re: Thank you for your service
Post by: Ayrsayle on May 13, 2017, 19:05:14
On a personal level, it does make me feel uncomfortable when it happens. 
 
I rationalize that I'm not likely being directly thanked, but that someone is in appreciating the service the military provides.  I'd thank a great number of people in uniform for their service, just feels odd to be thanked personally.

Either way - I agree its important to appreciate the gesture period, regardless of the personal feelings on it.  It is far easier to accept the kindness then explain why it shouldn't apply to you.
Title: Re: Thank you for your service
Post by: kratz on May 13, 2017, 19:20:21
I've always politely thanked them for their support.

From the feedback here, it reassuring to hear others have discomfort
when being thanked for doing our job.
Title: Re: Thank you for your service
Post by: Target Up on May 13, 2017, 20:12:07
"My pleasure" is the shortest polite reply I could come up with. They feel glowy, I don't feel greasy, win win.
Title: Re: Thank you for your service
Post by: Jed on May 14, 2017, 00:12:27
I never heard this sort of thing from anyone in Canada until after the first Roto into Afghanistan.  In the 80's and 90's my own family's attitude was you signed up for your own reasons, why do you need thanks?

After that, I had a few people want to buy me a coffee etc. and I have to admit it felt rather weird. The first time I actually felt good about it was during a large event down in the States where they asked serving members to stand, to receive the crowd's thanks.

I'm not in uniform so much anymore so it rarely comes up.
Title: Re: Thank you for your service
Post by: BeyondTheNow on May 14, 2017, 22:45:35
It makes me feel uncomfortable, mainly because I haven't done anything to warrant any sort of thanks...Literally, I haven't done anything. Obviously, the individual making the comments isn't aware of that and I generally smile, say something polite in return and that's that. However, there have been a few instances where people are insistent upon a gesture of gratitude of some sort and it's personally very awkward for me.
Title: Re: Thank you for your service
Post by: daftandbarmy on May 14, 2017, 23:28:39
It makes me feel uncomfortable, mainly because I haven't done anything to warrant any sort of thanks...Literally, I haven't done anything. Obviously, the individual making the comments isn't aware of that and I generally smile, say something polite in return and that's that. However, there have been a few instances where people are insistent upon a gesture of gratitude of some sort and it's personally very awkward for me.

I had dinner at a local restaurant in uniform and, when it came time to pay, found out that someone had kindly paid for me.

I gave the waitress some cash and asked her to 'please spend it on a customer who looks like they could use a little help, unlike me'.
Title: Re: Thank you for your service
Post by: BeyondTheNow on May 14, 2017, 23:47:36
I had dinner at a local restaurant in uniform and, when it came time to pay, found out that someone had kindly paid for me.

I gave the waitress some cash and asked her to 'please spend it on a customer who looks like they could use a little help, unlike me'.

I love that and wished I had been as quick on my feet. I recently had an incident occur while out for group lunch, but the individual approached me personally, in front of the rest of us, and wanted to pay for my meal alone. She had reasoning for why she only approached me, which she explained to us.  But I was very uneasy, even more so having been singled out. I smiled, as usual, said I appreciated the gesture very much, but in turn offered her the suggestion of making a donation through other means, so that it could benefit everyone. She wouldn't have it. She was paying for my meal and that was that. (I received friendly chuckles afterwards from a few I work with, because they could see how uncomfortable I was.) The woman wasn't taking no for an answer, and of course, politely declining can only be done so many times. It was the first time I'd been in a situation like that where the individual was extremely insistent. She paid for my meal, but I didn't think of exactly how to pay it forward at that moment, I said thank you and we left.
Title: Re: Thank you for your service
Post by: Haggis on May 15, 2017, 09:43:48
I always respond "Thank you for your support". It is an equitable response and both sides walk away feeling good for a bit.

I did exactly that in a Subway last week.  The gentleman paused, then went on to point out how he supports the CAF but not our political masters, and we parted ways.
Title: Re: Thank you for your service
Post by: mariomike on May 15, 2017, 13:51:19
Nicer than hearing, "I pay your salary.".  :)
Title: Re: Thank you for your service
Post by: Haggis on May 15, 2017, 15:47:14
Nicer than hearing, "I pay your salary.".  :)

My response to that is "Well, I pay taxes, too, so I guess that makes me self-employed."
Title: Re: Thank you for your service
Post by: kev994 on May 15, 2017, 20:31:07
Nicer than hearing, "I pay your salary.".  :)
Ask them when our back pay is coming :)
Title: Re: Thank you for your service
Post by: Ayrsayle on May 15, 2017, 21:19:49
Nicer than hearing, "I pay your salary.".  :)

I've used the "Since you pay my salary, I'm buying this round" justification on occasion when insisting on paying.  Actually haven't heard that one directly to my face, but I suspect the sentiment is still around....