Author Topic: What were they thinking?.....Dumb criminals.......add your dumb criminal story  (Read 101051 times)

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Offline PMedMoe

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World Cup ticket purchase leads to arrest of Mexican drug lord

Brazliian authorities arrested a long-sought suspected Mexican drug lord as he attempted to board a domestic flight from Rio de Janiero to Fortaleza, Brazil, where Mexico faced Brazil on Tuesday.

Jose Diaz-Barajas, 49, bought a ticket to the match under his real name. He was arrested at Tom Jobim airport and will remain in custody in Rio until he is extradited to the U.S. The U.S. Drug Enforcement Administration (DEA) assisted in the arrest, as Diaz-Barajas is suspected of exporting methamphetamine to the U.S.

More at link

 :facepalm:

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Offline PMedMoe

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Pro Tip for You Amateur Burglars: Log Out of Facebook Before Exiting the Smash and Grab

http://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=player_embedded&v=xywZw5rhl9s

 :rofl:
"A good traveler has no fixed plans, and is not intent on arriving".
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Woman Caught When She Posts Stolen Dress Selfie on Instagram

A 27-year-old Illinois woman who was accused of stealing several items from a clothing store was busted after she posted pictures of herself in a shoplifted dress on Facebook.

Danielle Sexton reportedly swiped a multicolored leopard print dress with a black waistband from Morties, a store in her native West Frankfort. After the owner's son, Kert Williams, posted a note about the theft and a description of the woman on his Facebook page, people quickly began pointing him toward Sexton's selfie, which she had just set as her new profile pic. Williams passed the information along to the police, who arrested her.

More at link

Hope she doesn't breed.....   ::)
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Offline 211RadOp

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Bladder bursting fish tank thief caught in sting

A British thief's getaway was foiled Saturday when he urinated on a wasps' nest and the anger insects stuck it to him.
 
Jamie Brown, 29, was on run after breaking into a Leeds, Yorkshire, store and making off with a fish tank, the Halifax Courier reported.
 
While hiding in some bushes Brown felt the need to relieve himself and made a direct hit on a wasps' nest, unleashing a stinging attack.
 
The Courier reported that a sweating and crying Brown was seen by police.
 
He told cops he was running home after being stung several times following a visit with his aunt. Police found a pair of gloves and the fish tank nearby.
 
Brown spent six hours in hospital before being released and sent to court, where he pleaded guilty to theft and jailed for 24 weeks

http://www.ottawasun.com/2014/08/13/bladder-bursting-fish-tank-thief-caught-in-sting
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Offline cupper

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Police: Prostitute, client join forces for burglary spree, then battle over loot

http://www.insidenova.com/news/arlington/police-prostitute-client-join-forces-for-burglary-spree-then-battle/article_5cdd8df6-7c9d-11e4-93e1-a3980241b67e.html

Quote
On Dec. 1 at 7:45 p.m., a witness in the 1100 block of South Hayes Street told police there had been a physical altercation between a man and woman.

When police located the suspects, it was determined that the woman was a prostitute who met the man at another location and, after what was described as a “brief sexual encounter,” both traveled to the Hayes Street area and stole items from several area businesses.
When the male suspect demanded one of the items from the woman, a verbal argument ensued, which then escalated into a physical confrontation.

The male suspect was arrested on an attempted-robbery charge; the female suspect was arrested due to an outstanding out-of-state warrant.
It's hard to win an argument against a smart person, it's damned near impossible against a stupid person.

There is no God, and life is just a myth.

"He who drinks, sleeps. He who sleeps, does not sin. He who does not sin, is holy. Therefore he who drinks, is holy."

Let's Go CAPS!

Offline S.M.A.

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Attempted ATM robbery blows up in man's face (Darwin Award nominee)
« Reply #155 on: December 31, 2014, 01:15:49 »
Moral of the story: don't use an IED to open an ATM to rob it.

CTV News

Quote
Darwin Award? Watch as attempted ATM robbery blows up in man's face

It’s a robbery attempt that’ll knock your socks off – if you’re wearing any.

An Australian man wasn’t wearing socks, but he did get his sandals knocked off early Monday in an explosive ATM robbery attempt captured on video by security camera.

In the video, the suspect appears to be using an improvised explosive in an attempt to destroy an ATM machine in the Australian suburb of Darwin. But the robbery goes wrong, and the explosive detonates while the man is standing directly in front of it.

(...SNIPPED)
Our Country
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"Courage is going from failure to failure without losing enthusiasm."
- Winston Churchill

Offline George Wallace

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DISCLAIMER: The opinions and arguments of George Wallace posted on this Site are solely those of George Wallace and not the opinion of Army.ca and are posted for information purposes only.
Unless so stated, they are reflective of my opinion -- and my opinion only, a right that I enjoy along with every other Canadian citizen.

Offline S.M.A.

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 :facepalm: :facepalm: :facepalm:

Global News

Quote
Man accidentally dials RCMP officer, offering to sell weed

VANCOUVER – A North Vancouver RCMP Strike Force officer was surprised to receive a call from an unknown man on Tuesday, offering to sell him some marijuana.

(...SNIPPED)


Our Country
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"A leader is best when people barely know he exists, when his work is done, his aim fulfilled, they will say: We did it ourselves."   - Lao Zi (老子)
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"Courage is going from failure to failure without losing enthusiasm."
- Winston Churchill

Offline 211RadOp

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Freed from prison, man robs same NJ store 14 years later

A man faces a return to prison for robbing the same New Jersey shoe store - and the same clerk - that he held up 14 years earlier, authorities said.
 
Christopher Miller, 41, pleaded guilty to robbing the shoe store in Toms River in March 2014, one day after his release from prison where he had been sent for robbing the same store in 1999, Ocean County, New Jersey prosecutors said.
 
In the more recent robbery, a clerk who had worked at the store during the first robbery recognized Miller as the same culprit, prosecutors said.
 
The clerk had been notified of Miller's release on parole, said Al Della Fave, spokesman for the Ocean County Prosecutor's Office.
 
"She looks up and there he is," Della Fave said.
 
Police said the bandit demanded money and cell phones from employees, forced them into a back room and fled with $389 cash.
 
Miller pleaded guilty on Monday to second-degree robbery in Ocean County Superior Court and faces the possibility of 10 to 20 years in prison when he is sentenced on May 15, prosecutors said


http://www.thewhig.com/2015/03/11/freed-from-prison-man-robs-same-nj-store-14-years-later
“Behind every great man is a woman rolling her eyes." Jim Carrey
"Do unto others, then run." Benny Hill
"There's no better feeling in the world than a warm pizza box on your lap." Kevin James

Offline GUS021

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This could have been criminal. In the end, it was just a dumb idea.


Quote
Frenchman packs Russian wife in suitcase to enter EU
Poland's border guards detained the man but there was no need for his antics because his wife would have had no trouble entering the passport-free Schengen travel zone
      
A Frenchman tried to smuggle his Russian wife into the EU by hiding her in a massive suitcase, without realising there had been no need for the would-be James Bond scheme.

Poland's border guards detained the man, whom authorities said was in his 60s, on Friday at the railway station in Terespol, an eastern town on the border with Belarus.

The size of the luggage drew the suspicion of the officers, according to Dariusz Sienicki, a border guard spokesman.
"To their surprise, a woman in her 30s emerged. It was the Russian wife of the owner of the suitcase," he told AFP.
"She was alive and well and didn't require medical attention."

The couple, who had been taking the train from Moscow to the French city of Nice, were soon released after questioning and decided to return to Belarus.

Little did they know the woman would have had no trouble entering the passport-free Schengen travel zone without the over-the-top caper.

"Had she been sitting next to her husband, she would have made it through without incident," Sienicki said.
Non-EU citizen spouses are allowed to enter if they can prove their marital ties, so that families can stay together.
Instead the couple had risked "a three-year jail sentence because of their attempt to evade border control," he added.
"This was the first time I've seen someone travel like this. She very well could have been a victim of human trafficking."

http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/worldnews/europe/poland/11476121/Frenchman-packs-Russian-wife-in-suitcase-to-enter-EU.html
« Last Edit: March 21, 2015, 13:13:45 by GUS021 »

Offline Fishbone Jones

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He's from Essex not Windsor.  ;)

http://www.nationalpost.com/m/wp/blog.html?b=news.nationalpost.com/2015/03/19/man-phones-911-and-reports-himself-for-drunk-driving-ive-never-heard-of-anybody-doing-this-before-police-say

Quote
A Windsor-area man pulled his car to the side of the road, put on his four-way flashers and called police Tuesday to report he was too drunk to drive — a situation police say is one of the most unusual impaired driving charges they’ve laid.

Kevin O’Neil with the Ontario Provincial Police.

“In all my years of policing, I’ve never heard of anybody doing this before,” said Const. Kevin O’Neil with the Ontario Provincial Police. “I’ve been doing this job a long time and you always think you’ve heard or seen everything. But needless to say, some of us were a little bit surprised by what we heard about this.”

Donald Dummer, 55, of Essex, was arrested and charged with impaired driving. He will appear in court next month.

O’Neil said the man was driving on Highway 3 on his way to an appointment around 10 a.m. Tuesday.

“For whatever reason, he decided to pull over to the side of the road then and there and call us,” O’Neil said.

It’s not known where the man was headed at the time.

When police arrived, the man was still on his cellphone talking with OPP dispatch. Officers found an open bottle of liquor.

“Really, the message here is look at some of the ridiculous things that people do when they are drinking and driving,” O’Neil said. “We can’t say what he would have done had he not called the police. We are glad that we were able to get this guy off the road.”

You’re going to get caught one way or another, even if it means calling the police to report it yourself.

O’Neil said the driver still should have known better than to drive while impaired. He said it doesn’t matter what time of day, the dangers of driving drunk are the same and in the morning there are more cars on the road.

“You could drive off the road and roll your vehicle or fall asleep, pass out behind the wheel. Before you know it, you swerve out to the other lane and you strike an oncoming vehicle,” he said.

Police have laid impaired driving charges at all hours of the day. O’Neil said sometimes people will drink all night long and drive home in the morning, leading to charges around the same time as Tuesday’s incident.

“It’s the same lesson we’ve been preaching for years and years about drinking and driving,” O’Neil said. “You’re going to get caught one way or another, even if it means calling the police to report it yourself.”
Corruption in politics doesn't scare me.
What scares me is how comfortable people are doing nothing about it.

Offline GUS021

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Quote
Donald Dummer, 55, of Essex, was arrested and charged with impaired driving.

At the same time, he should be reward to have denounce a drunk driver. ;D

It's amazing to see people, despite the fact that they do rellay stupid things (drinking while driving), that can still have a bit of a conscience. Well... may be it was right after he threw up. ::)
« Last Edit: March 21, 2015, 20:30:12 by GUS021 »

Offline 211RadOp

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Virginia man robs bank, posts heist videos online

REUTERS
First posted: Thursday, May 07, 2015 03:01 PM EDT | Updated: Thursday, May 07, 2015 03:29 PM EDT


A suspected Virginia bank robber posted online videos of the heist and a photo of his note asking for $150,000 just before his arrest, local media reported on Thursday.
 
The suspect, Dominyk Antonio Alfonseca, 23, of Norfolk, walked into TowneBank in Virginia Beach around 1:40 p.m. EDT on Monday and handed the teller a note asking for the money, police said in a statement.
 
Alfonseca left the bank and immediately posted on Instagram two videos of the teller loading bills into a bag, and one photo of his robbery note, according to the Virginian-Pilot newspaper.
 
Alfonseca was arrested 22 minutes later. Police would not discuss details and said the investigation was ongoing.
 
He was charged with one felony count of robbery, according to court records.
 
Alfonseca told the newspaper he was innocent because he did not demand or steal the money, but asked for it politely and said "please."
 
His next court appearance is June 12.


http://www.ottawasun.com/2015/05/07/virginia-man-robs-bank-posts-heist-videos-online
“Behind every great man is a woman rolling her eyes." Jim Carrey
"Do unto others, then run." Benny Hill
"There's no better feeling in the world than a warm pizza box on your lap." Kevin James

Offline cupper

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Virginia man robs bank, posts heist videos online

It's the quality of criminal I've come to expect in my adopted state. Makes me proud to be a resident. :nod:
It's hard to win an argument against a smart person, it's damned near impossible against a stupid person.

There is no God, and life is just a myth.

"He who drinks, sleeps. He who sleeps, does not sin. He who does not sin, is holy. Therefore he who drinks, is holy."

Let's Go CAPS!

Offline Chris Pook

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A good day in Waco -

Three biker gangs in a shootout.

9 Bikers dead.
18 Bikers wounded.
100 weapons recovered.

Bikers held at gunpoint by local constabulary.

No LEO casualties.
No Bystander casualties.



"Wyrd bið ful aræd"

"If change isn’t allowed to be a process, it becomes an event." - Penny Mordaunt 10/10/2019

“Life can only be understood backwards, but it must be lived forwards” ~ Soren Kierkegaard

ignoramus et ignorabimus

Offline Brihard

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A good day in Waco -

Three biker gangs in a shootout.

9 Bikers dead.
18 Bikers wounded.
100 weapons recovered.

Bikers held at gunpoint by local constabulary.

No LEO casualties.
No Bystander casualties.



Society wins.
Pacificsm is doctrine fostered by a delusional minority and by the media, which holds forth the proposition it is entirely possible to pick up a turd by the clean end.

Offline cupper

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Just how bad are you when you are disavowed by every other Klan organization.  :facepalm:

Ku Klux Klown: The Racist Behind Today’s Pro-Confederate Flag Demonstration Is Hated Even by Other Klansmen

http://www.vice.com/read/ku-klux-klown-the-racist-behind-todays-proconfederate-flag-demonstration-is-hated-even-by-other-klansmen

Quote
Today, July 18, a rally is being held at the South Carolina statehouse in Charleston to protest the removal of the Confederate flag. The action has been organized by a North Carolina group called the Loyal White Knights of the Ku Klax Klan, which bills itself as the "largest Klan in America." Understandably, this chapter of the KKK has been receiving a lot of attention; a pair of its members, Robert Jones and James Spears, have been widely quoted in the media praising the flag and Dylann Roof, the 21-year-old charged with the shooting deaths of nine people in an African-American church.

Except Smith and Jones aren't real people—both are aliases for Christopher Barker of North Carolina, an unemployed man in his 30s with an extensive rap sheet who is despised even by other white supremacists.

Barker's involvement has not been reported elsewhere, but over the course of numerous phone conversations acknowledged to VICE that he used Spears and Jones as pseudonyms and was responsible for organizing the rally—even though he also says that he's banned from Klan activity as a condition of his parole. (That's the reason he won't be attending the rally in person, he told VICE.)

Barker's name doesn't appear on the official application for permission to protest at the Charleston statehouse—it was filled out instead by his wife, Amanda, who also runs the LWK website.

Barker's criminal record, according to law enforcement documents, spans at least 18 years and includes arrests on at least 20 charges, including larceny, possession of stolen goods, malicious arson, at least five DUIs, and possession of a firearm by a felon. Most of the charges aren't related to white supremacy—instead, they are indicative of a man with an alcohol problem and a short temper who can't stay out of trouble.

"We have long been aware of Chris Barker," said Craig Blitzer, the Rockingham County, North Carolina, District Attorney. "We have charged Barker over the years with forgery, assault with a deadly weapon, making threats, an arson charge, an assault on a female in 2011 and again in 2014, DWI in '07 and '09 and '04, possession of stolen goods, larceny, two charges of possession of a stolen weapon, and an open container charge last month. And that is just in Rockingham County."

On Christmas Eve 2008, Barker was arrested for trying to burn down the house of a man he apparently thought was having an affair with his wife. "We found his electronic discount card—the kind you swipe at the cash register at Walmart each time you buy something—at the fire scene, which traced back to Barker," said Rockingham County Fire Marshal Robert Cardwell. "When we went to talk to him, he was so drunk we couldn't understand half of what he was saying. He was drinking beer through the whole interview."

"I think Mr. Barker has a problem with alcohol," he added.

The arson charges were dismissed in April of 2009 after "the prosecuting witness failed to appear," according to the Rockingham County Court clerk, who noted that the "prosecuting witness had pending charges against him." (The man whose house Barker allegedly tried to burn down is now in prison himself in Florida.)

In 2011, Barker was charged with assault on his wife, but those charges, too, were dismissed "when the prosecuting witness failed to appear," said the Rockingham County court clerk. She added that the "prosecutor asked for a motion of continuance, but it was denied by the judge so the charges were dropped."

Barker founded the Loyal White Knights in April 2012 after being expelled from at least three other KKK groups, and established a reputation shortly afterward for squabbling with other Klans online and for allying himself with neo-Nazis—a tactic that many Klan members disagree with.

Despite its boasts, the LWK hasn't attracted much in the way of membership, according to law enforcement officials and members of other KKK groups.

"We don't know of any other people from here who are members of his group. It is just a website," said Lieutenant Richie Jeffries of the Eden, North Carolina, police department, the small town where Barker lived until this month. "We have arrested Barker many times, but as for his Klan, we haven't seen anyone else but him."

His fellow Klansman are even more dismissive of Barker.

"They are inciting the public over a hot issue to gain publicity and attract paying members over the internet... He has conned the media into believing he is something he is not," said JB Elmore, the Grand Giant of Virgil's White Knights of the KKK. "There are many old Klansmen turning over in their graves because of Barker and his sort of modern day fake 'mom and pop' Klans."

"To be honest, what they're doing just makes me want to walk away from the Klan in some ways," said the Traditionalist American Knights of the Ku Klux Klan Imperial Wizard Frank Ancona, whose organization has long been a rival of Barker and his LWK. "It just goes against everything I've worked for. The image people are going to have in their mind when they think of the Klan after the South Carolina Confederate flag demonstration is those are a bunch of nutcases."
It's hard to win an argument against a smart person, it's damned near impossible against a stupid person.

There is no God, and life is just a myth.

"He who drinks, sleeps. He who sleeps, does not sin. He who does not sin, is holy. Therefore he who drinks, is holy."

Let's Go CAPS!

Offline 211RadOp

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Fake officer tries to pull over off-duty cop, gets arrested

NORTH KINGSVILLE, Ohio -- A man pretending to be a police officer was caught and charged because the driver targeted by his bogus traffic stop was a real officer.
 
Police in North Kingsville, Ohio say an off-duty officer was stopped Sunday night by the alleged impersonator, who was driving a black sport utility vehicle with red and blue emergency-style lights. Village police Chief Hugh Flanigan tells a local newspaper that the unarmed man in civilian clothes repeatedly tried to convince the officer that he was a real lawman, but eventually drove away.
 
Flanigan says the officer contacted village police, who found the suspect within minutes. A prosecutor says the 42-year-old man faces a misdemeanour charge of impersonating an officer.

http://www.ottawasun.com/2015/08/04/fake-officer-tries-to-pull-over-off-duty-cop-gets-arrested
“Behind every great man is a woman rolling her eyes." Jim Carrey
"Do unto others, then run." Benny Hill
"There's no better feeling in the world than a warm pizza box on your lap." Kevin James

Offline 211RadOp

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Man stumbles during robbery attempt, setting off gun, killing partner

PHOENIX -- A man planned to rob a Phoenix home but stumbled walking up to it -- setting off his revolver and fatally shooting his co-conspirator, police say.
 
Authorities say that after his arrest, Jose Perez-Torres admitted to the Sept. 25 fatal shooting of 19-year-old Eric Hernandez-Tellez. Phoenix police say the 21-year-old Perez-Torres initially fled the scene, but they caught up with him later in Tempe.
 
He was booked into jail on suspicion of first-degree murder, conspiracy to commit armed robbery and other charges stemming from warrants.

http://www.ottawasun.com/2015/09/29/man-stumbles-during-robbery-attempt-setting-off-gun-killing-partner
“Behind every great man is a woman rolling her eyes." Jim Carrey
"Do unto others, then run." Benny Hill
"There's no better feeling in the world than a warm pizza box on your lap." Kevin James

Offline S.M.A.

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Impressive...NOT!

Shanghaiist

Quote
Three idiots pose with a fake gun on board plane at Beijing airport, pics go viral

A trio of brilliant chaps in China decided it would be funny to pose for a photo with what appeared to be a gun while seated on a freaking airplane. The photos have subsequently made their way onto Chinese social media, first hitting WeChat on Sunday before going viral.

While many viewers at first glance were shocked to see a gun on a flight, upon closer inspection astute observers pointed out that the gun was most likely fake, and probably a laptop battery made up to be used as a prop gun.

While the act has been roundly criticized by all viewers, opinions on what should be done have been mixed.

(...SNIPPED)
Our Country
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"A leader is best when people barely know he exists, when his work is done, his aim fulfilled, they will say: We did it ourselves."   - Lao Zi (老子)
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"Courage is going from failure to failure without losing enthusiasm."
- Winston Churchill

Offline 211RadOp

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Shoplifter Caught after Walking Near Robbery Scene

Release Date: October 12, 2017
17-34006
 
A 33-year-old local man was arrested for shoplifting after being stopped by officers searching for a robbery suspect.  
 
On October 11, 2017 at approximately 3:10 p.m. the accused was walking on Wellington Street. A patrol officer responding to a robbery at the CIBC on Bagot Street observed the accused walking at a fast pace. The accused matched the description of the robbery suspect and was quickly stopped by officers.
 
The accused was detained for investigation at which point officers observed a price tag and a security tag on the jacket he was wearing. A search revealed the accused had four jackets with price tags.
 
It was determined the accused was not the robbery suspect however he was linked to a theft that had occurred 2:45 p.m. at a store nearby on Princess Street.
 
The accused was transported to police headquarters where he was held to attend a bail hearing the following day.

https://www.kingstonpolice.ca/news-events/news-releases/shoplifter-caught-after-walking-near-robbery-scene/?utm_content=bufferd8ace&utm_medium=social&utm_source=facebook.com&utm_campaign=buffer
 
The accused was charged with theft and breach probation
“Behind every great man is a woman rolling her eyes." Jim Carrey
"Do unto others, then run." Benny Hill
"There's no better feeling in the world than a warm pizza box on your lap." Kevin James

Offline youngger@12

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A criminal is set on fire while trying to light a cigarette. He sees a ladder going up to a gym's washroom. He tries to climb the ladder to get to the showers and put out the fire. A policeman doesnt understand or doesnt see what the criminal is trying to do and kicks him so he falls to the ground and rolls him. the criminal get up and tries to climb the ladder again. the policeman kicks him again and rolls him again. This goes on for some time. Finally the criminal knocks his head and falls unconscious. The policeman rolls him again, snuffing out the fire. When the criminal finally wakes up the policeman says we finally got you and put you out. The criminal just stares at him and says, thanks a lot. The moral of the story, dont light a smoke, light a candle.

How do you know your in prison? They show you the door.
« Last Edit: November 04, 2017, 15:05:19 by youngger@12 »
I walk down the street
and I don't give a damn
people, they stare
and they ask who I am
and if by chance I should run over a cad
I can pay for the damage, if ever so bad.

War came upon us by stealth; only when we looked back, could we clearly see how it had come

Offline youngger@12

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On the subject of dumb criminals, when logic and the english language meet the law. Cruel and Usual Punishment. The first one always has a good case for appeal, damn the rest.
I walk down the street
and I don't give a damn
people, they stare
and they ask who I am
and if by chance I should run over a cad
I can pay for the damage, if ever so bad.

War came upon us by stealth; only when we looked back, could we clearly see how it had come

Offline Fishbone Jones

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This is a humour thread about published articles about stupid mistakes criminals make. It's not a soap box for your off subject rants and/ or commentaries. Start acting accordingly please.
Corruption in politics doesn't scare me.
What scares me is how comfortable people are doing nothing about it.

Offline Brihard

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Bahahahahahaha! Some dude visiting Hamilton from the US yelled a classy 'FHRITP' to a reporter as she was doing an interview... With a uniformed Hamilton police officer. At a police station. The officer strolls over to the vehicle, has the young lad step out, arrests him for causing a disturbance and since he's from out of country holds him in cells overnight to attend bail court in the morning. And of course it's all on high quality video. :D

https://www.themaven.net/bluelivesmatter/news/man-yells-fhritp-at-reporter-cop-she-was-interviewing-takes-him-in-xhNZzVoRVkqFQAC-m-mhsg
Pacificsm is doctrine fostered by a delusional minority and by the media, which holds forth the proposition it is entirely possible to pick up a turd by the clean end.