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Things are going ok. No improvement on sight, I just hope it's not cataracts or something that will require surgery. I got a phobia when it comes the eyes, I begin to freak out just thinking about eye surgery. The only reason why I was able to do basic PRK was in order to be infantry. ANyways...

Im affaird to even think about drinks. The pain killers I'm on is accauly some kind of morphine, Im remember how much T3s and booze fucked me up. To drink like this would be insane! LOL.

Like  how good I am money wise!...sorry, but with all the cancer stuff, seeing other cancer patients dealing with the challage, it feels realy good to know I don't have to worry about money like they do. Not only that, to be buying a place... But maybe I should not be so happy, I may have to...

Doctor's appointment in Victoria tommorow, stupid hour drive. Im sorry, I need a moment to gloat here. Before I ended up in hospital I was buying a place. Today I was finnaly able to get in the bank to do some needed paper work, but I was shocked to find out minimum payment was only $620.  As a...

My radiation is done, its nothing but recouvery from here on out. Walking is better day by day, taste in a month, sight they say about two.

Its not all gloomful ranting, remember that I was badged. To go from c0rnflake to PPCLI, to have a room of officers say practicaly "You didn't do BIQ, but we still think your the right stuff and are makeing you one of us". The other thhing I take away is the "I" of the "PPCLI", shen I spoke...

Thank you, it's just that here is the only place peopple understand how it would feel to go from soldier to this level of weekness.

Thats the other thing, this mess has been going on for over a year now, the whole "you have cancer". Admin wise, I was told alot of things and eventualy fell between the cracks. Its only recently that my camcer has become an issue. I don't know whats going on, the doctors don't, the other...

No, I stoped playing that years ago. To many people took it to far, useing spreadsheets to determin what they should build. Plus, my eyrs are still to bad to keep up to a RTS game.

I know I screwed when people with testical cancer feel sorry for me...I guess its no different than how I feel sorry for people who live 7 months in hospital undergoing treatment. But this is the suffer in silince part, we know whats up, we just sqaure our sholders and march on. Come on, its...

frig, this is what I hate. I literaly just got back from the grocery store, picking up all sorts stuff I hope is good and know is good, but I feel so tired. I hate that my taste is ****ed, or that I can't see frig all outside a room, but I hate being this ******* weak. Not feeling weak, being...

I know what it is now that I've had a chance to sleep on it, Im on the homestreach, and I hate that place. The real work, challage is beat, and now I just want to be done with it all. Im not patient, even driving places, the closer I get to home, the faster I want to drive. As treatment rounds...

I hear what your saying. Im home on the couch, but its going to be a while untill I really start to feel better. I guess I woun't untill last treatment is over wensday. Im just sick of feeling sick.

Nothing wrong with MSE, just not the job I signed up for. And honestly, I see MSE as a mixed opertunity. If I can't be infantry, its a good way to get action overseas, but then again you could be stuck on the wainwright-edmonton med-run everyday. Yes I can double clutch.

Holy fuck, the booster radiation is intense. The normal treatment was 6 mv, the 4 more booster treatments will be at 18 mv, the highest power the machine is allowed to be operated at. I thought I felt drained before, this is like how you would feel after a week long field ex, just drained But...

I'm getting out today, radiation in 15 miniutes and then I go live on base fot a few days. The weekend I get to go home, then its only 2 or so treatments before Im home for good. Almost over, then I can finnaly begin to recouver.

It's called duty, and no soldier, or even citizen, should ever find themselves short on it.

Thankyou everybody for the kind words and supportl They took the cathader out on Sunday, the same day I was able to go home for a little while. The idea ids not to need to be in the hospital, I could be out tommorow, living on base for the rest of my treatment. Spraking of radiation today was...

The military has been great, on Tuesday they put my parenys up in a PMQ on base instead of paying for a hotel. Its really nice not to my parents commuting uo and down the Island, my dad  works in vic and my mom is here everyday. Also, once I am able I do not have to stay at the hospital, I will...

Medical update, moday they took out the cathader. Things were ok, I was peeing okish, but then I started to get crazy ammounts of pain in my hips and legs. Then I wasn't able to drain my bladder. So they did and urine tests, put the cathader back in, and it turns out I have some kind of urinary...