# Joining reg force: "You're going to die there."



## poutinelover (17 Apr 2008)

I have told peers about my decision to join reg force (hopefully ImageTech) and everytime I turn around there is someone telling me I am going to die. I was also told I am going to not only die, but will die fighting in a useless combat for a useless cause. The thought of the possiblity of death hadn't changed my mind. But how does one even respond to the concerns of family and peers? :-\


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## Kendrick (17 Apr 2008)

By studying the subject very well and becoming very knowledgeable in what they are not, and as such be able to provide them with information that they are not aware of, to better explain what really is what.  A lot of people however don't care about getting informed at all.  Those who respect you, and diserve your respect, will respect your choices.  "You're going to die there" and such comments are very misinformed, if not downright ignorant.  Don't let them get to you.  Read up on things, ask question, make up your own ideas.  Good luck with it all.


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## poutinelover (17 Apr 2008)

Thank you! Your words were very helpful and encouraging


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## Celticgirl (17 Apr 2008)

poutinelover said:
			
		

> I have told peers about my decision to join reg force (hopefully ImageTech) and everytime I turn around there is someone telling me I am going to die. I was also told I am going to not only die, but will die fighting in a useless combat for a useless cause. The thought of the possiblity of death hadn't changed my mind. But how does one even respond to the concerns of family and peers? :-\



It's your life, your career, and ultimately, your decision. I don't think very many applicants are immune to those types of comments, especially now. I've had a few of those comments/questions and just pretty much shrugged them off. There is nothing to debate as far as I am concerned. My father tried to talk me out of applying (for a second time) and even said to me, "You're not the army type." (He's right - I chose the Air Force.  ;D) I just told him that I'm an adult and I will make the decision that is best for me. He realized then that he couldn't talk me out of it and has not tried since. 

Don't bother arguing with anyone over your decision. It isn't worth destroying your relationships over, and you should take what people say with a grain of salt. They mean well, but they can't decide for you.  If they continue to pressure you, just smile, thank them for their concern, and change the subject. 

If you want to talk to supportive people, you have found the right place right here (army.ca).


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## HollywoodHitman (17 Apr 2008)

Remember, people fear what they do not fully understand. People who disagree with your choices will also often try and change your mind more along the lines of how they think. 

Research, investigate and make your own decisions. 

Good luck.


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## TCBF (17 Apr 2008)

poutinelover said:
			
		

> I have told peers about my decision to join reg force (hopefully ImageTech) and everytime I turn around there is someone telling me I am going to die. I was also told I am going to not only die, but will die fighting in a useless combat for a useless cause. The thought of the possibility of death hadn't changed my mind. But how does one even respond to the concerns of family and peers? :-\



- Look at them, smile, and say "Everybody has to die of something"!

- They are projecting their fears, says Freud (via Wikipedia):

- "In psychology, psychological projection (or projection bias) is a defense mechanism in which one attributes one’s own unacceptable or unwanted thoughts or/and emotions to others. Projection reduces anxiety by allowing the expression of the unwanted subconscious impulses/desires without letting the ego recognize them. The theory was developed by Sigmund Freud and further refined by his daughter Anna Freud, and for this reason, it is sometimes referred to as "Freudian Projection"[1] [2]

- Good people will self-identify by supporting you.  Discard the rest as useless, unless they are relatives.


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## JABAC (17 Apr 2008)

For some reason, the thought of dying in combat does not turn me off joining the military at all.  In fact, I think it is one of the most honourable ways to die.  Personally, I would rather give my life for my country than die without a reason.  We are all going to go someday; some of us may die when we are old, some by an accident or health issue, and a very few of us while serving our country.  It is up to each of us to decide whether this is something we are prepared to do, or if the risk is not worth it.  I have much admiration for people who believe so strongly in something they are willing to risk their life for it.  Something to think about: Is Canada, it's people, our future and freedom worth dying for? And would you?  

Anyway, if you are unsure how to explain your reasons to your friends and family, this is maybe one way to think about it or explain it.  I don't mean to get all philosophical or anything, but when it comes down to life and death, it can be a pretty big fear for people to get over.  They might just need to understand that you are prepared for it.


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## the 48th regulator (17 Apr 2008)

A few good ones to bust out, all from great flicks...



> Sgt. O'Neill: Bob, I got a bad feeling on this one, all right? I mean I got a bad feeling! I don't think I'm gonna make it outta here! D'ya understand what I'm sayin' to you?
> Sgt. Barnes:  Everybody gotta die some time, Red.





> Son, we live in a world that has walls and those walls need to be guarded by men with guns. Who's gonna do it? You? You, Lieutenant Weinberg? I have a greater responsibility than you can possibly fathom. You weep for Santiago and curse the Marines; you have that luxury. You have the luxury of not knowing what I know: that Santiago's death, while tragic, probably saved lives and that my existence, while grotesque and incomprehensible to you, saves lives.
> You don't want the truth because deep down in places you don't talk about at parties you want me on that wall, you need me on that wall. We use words like honor, code, loyalty. We use then as the backbone of a life trying to defend something. You use them as a punchline. I have neither the time nor the inclination to explain myself to a man who rises and sleeps under the blanket of the very freedom I provide and then questions the manner in which I provide it. I would rather you just said "thank you," and went on your way. Otherwise, I suggest that you pick up a weapon and stand a post. Either way, I don't give a damn what you think you are entitled to.



You will be a hit with all the kids;

dileas

tess


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## poutinelover (17 Apr 2008)

Wow. All of these responses were just great, some funny, some very creative and others quite deep. I feel comfortable once again with my decision and am not going to join just because of discouraging comments. I agree with the points made, as they make sense. It's great to hear not-so-negative input. I want to thank all of you for taking the time to reply. There were points made I hadn't even thought of before!


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## aesop081 (17 Apr 2008)

You could die crossing the street too........but that doesnt stop you does it ?

Do what you want to do. Jon the CF, you will make new and better friends there anyways


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## daftandbarmy (17 Apr 2008)

"Every man thinks ill of himself for not having been a soldier" 

Dr Johnson


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## Yrys (17 Apr 2008)

daftandbarmy said:
			
		

> "Every man thinks ill of himself for not having been a soldier"
> 
> Dr Johnson



He must have never met a "pacifist" or  any of most of the left ideology persons !


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## Kat Stevens (17 Apr 2008)

I dunno, man, the 412th Photo Imaging Brigade were almost wiped out to a man in the first 48 hours of Desert Storm..... : .  Tell em all to eat cake, you're off to snort photo chemicals for a living.


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## 1feral1 (17 Apr 2008)

poutinelover said:
			
		

> I have told peers about my decision to join reg force (hopefully ImageTech) and everytime I turn around there is someone telling me I am going to die. I was also told I am going to not only die, but will die fighting in a useless combat for a useless cause. The thought of the possiblity of death hadn't changed my mind. But how does one even respond to the concerns of family and peers? :-\



Personally I think you have a better chance of being hit by a bus crossing the street, or developing bowel cancer before you are KIA'd. Sounds like you friends you confided in have political connections to the obvious.

Defence is a good carrer, travel, good money, good benifits, secuirty, new skills, good career advancement, and a new family of great people, friends for life and then some.  Go with your heart, and do want you want to. Your true friends will understand, regardless of how they feel.


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## cavalryman (17 Apr 2008)

Yrys said:
			
		

> He must have never met a "pacifist" or  any of most of the left ideology persons !



Ah, but consider the self-loathing so common on the left side of the spectrum...  There may be a relationship between that phenomenon and Dr. Johnson's  observation.  People who lack the moral courage to stand up for something, and know it... the dots do connect  ;D


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## daftandbarmy (17 Apr 2008)

HollywoodHitman said:
			
		

> Remember, people fear what they do not fully understand. People who disagree with your choices will also often try and change your mind more along the lines of how they think.
> 
> Research, investigate and make your own decisions.
> 
> Good luck.



Johnny Rico: Mr. Rasczak, I want to join the Federal Service and become a citizen. But my Dad thinks I should go to college and remain a civilian as he has. What should I do? 

Jean Rasczak: Figuring things out for yourself is practically the only freedom anyone really has nowadays. Use that freedom. 

Starship Troopers  ;D
http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0120201/quotes


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## Yrys (17 Apr 2008)

daftandbarmy said:
			
		

> Starship Troopers  ;D
> http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0120201/quotes



Good book and movie.

On the subject of the thread, repeat after me : "There is no oil in Afghanistan!" (pet peeves of me).


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## PPCLI Guy (17 Apr 2008)

daftandbarmy said:
			
		

> "Every man thinks ill of himself for not having been a soldier"
> 
> Dr Johnson



And gentlemen in England now-a-bed 
    Shall think themselves accurs'd they were not here, 
    And hold their manhoods cheap whiles any speaks 
    That fought with us upon Saint Crispin's day.


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## MamaBear (17 Apr 2008)

poutinelover,

If your family/friends really have your best interests at heart they will come around.  Knowledge is the best way to change someone's mind.  I know, I was one of those people who freaked when her child said they were joining the military.  Not because I don't respect every member of the forces.  Not because I am not thankful for the fabulous job each member does.  But because of fear.  Fear that is born out of love yes, but mostly due to a lack of knowledge and understanding.  The more information she provided me with and the more I researched and learned about our Canadian Armed Forces, the more I began to respect her decision.  I know it was not a decision made lightly.  And really when I think back on how she was raised (by her father and me) I realize that it's really not a curveball that she has thrown, but rather a predictable outcome for the beliefs and philosophies we have instilled in her.  She has always been the defender of the small, weak and frightened.  She has always put the good of the world ahead of her needs.  She has always wanted to live life to fullest, every moment of every day.  And what better way to exemplify all those traits than to become a member of our national defenders.

So, be patient with those you love.  Let them see what it means to you to do something like this.  Give them knowledge and help them see the value of this occupation to you, to them and to your country.  They will come around, because they love you - not for what you do, but for who you are.


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## armyvern (17 Apr 2008)

poutinelover said:
			
		

> I have told peers about my decision to join reg force (hopefully ImageTech) and everytime I turn around there is someone telling me I am going to die. I was also told I am going to not only die, but will die fighting in a useless combat for a useless cause. The thought of the possiblity of death hadn't changed my mind. But how does one even respond to the concerns of family and peers? :-\



Here's a good thread for you to read. There's some very valid and interesting points made in it from others who have experienced the same thing as you are now undergoing. There's 12 pages ...

Peoples Attitudes changed when stated I was joining 

ArmyVern
The Milnet.ca Staff


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## daftandbarmy (22 Jun 2008)

poutinelover,

Send sitrep, over. (If you're in the army by now, you'll know what that means. If not... meh)


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## MedTechStudent (22 Jun 2008)

Your joining the military.
Militaries fight wars.
People die in wars.

THE END

If you want to go into the CF, its your choice and others should respect you for it.  Granted you are choosing a career that *possibly* puts you into harms way, but thats what you sign up for.  Explain the simple truth to your family and friends, and then they will decide whether or not to accept it.

Cheers, Kyle


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## MedTechStudent (22 Jun 2008)

PPCLI Guy said:
			
		

> And gentlemen in England now-a-bed
> Shall think themselves accurs'd they were not here,
> And hold their manhoods cheap whiles any speaks
> That fought with us upon Saint Crispin's day.



Can never read that without thinking of *"Tombstone"* when he recites it as people are shooting the pillar beside him.  Classic.


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## axeman (22 Jun 2008)

I'm of the fatalistic bend , "Everybody dies but not everyone lives."  I've been in over 21 yrs now,17 of those with the Infantry . Theres a lot of friends that have passed away  and a lot that haven't. Of my civilian friends  less have passed away .. But of that i dont think that many have made the impact on other ppls life the way that  anyone in the CF does.   From peacekeeping peacemaking disaster acsistance to simple action from training that kicks in automaticly , ie car accidents . I believe that IF YOU want to make a impact on YOUR life serve , it may not be the end all be all but after that you will always be able to recall one day in the future "I was a soldier[sailor airman ] once and young. "
when ever i get to my old home town  and run into someone that i havent seen in years  they ask what have you been up to i hear well i sell cars .  and other mundane type jobs not that im detracting from them but they are not the job for me . even though i do the same job that some of them do  the prime differnce is in addition to the job  I SERVE. There are not many that can say that .   

In the End  only you can make the choice .


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## RCDtpr (25 Jun 2008)

You know what I tell people when they say "you're going to die over there"?  I merely respond "ok."  Anyone who spouts off dribble like that is misinformed and will never understand your decision.  The people who DO understand will more than likley back you for life on your decision to join.  At least that's what I've noticed over the couple years I've been in.


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## Fusaki (25 Jun 2008)

Man, if some dude starts telling you that you're going to die in Afghanistan and that you're fighting a useless war all you gotta do is this:

Shake his hand, and then wink at his girlfriend, 'cause you both know she's dating a pus*y.


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