# Peoples Attitudes changed when stated I was joining



## baudspeed (18 Aug 2006)

I have a question regarding how people around you acted when you stated that you were going to join the CF? I have  had such a large mixed reaction from friends and family that i felt at times that maybe i was being crazy. I am joining because i am (what i consider) well read on what canada has done for the world, and want to participate, even if that means I am put in harms way.
However, when i tell them that i am making a career change, they smile and encourage me to be adventurous, then when they ask what i will be doing, and i tell them that i am intending to give the army some of my time, their faces drop and i get the 'Thats nice' smile, and the conversation stalls out. At which time, i feel somewhat out of place.

Anyone else had experiences like this? does it end once you are in? Am I the only one who is in this boat?


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## LeonTheNeon (18 Aug 2006)

My wife is very supportive.  She knows and firmly believes that I was meant for military service.  My kids are happy for me because they know that this is my calling, but they are sad that I'll be away from home.

My mother doesn't like the idea.  She thinks the military/gov't is corrupt and negative influence on the world.  She thinks I'm giving up too much to serve.  Also, she doesn't want me to get killed.

My father understands why I need to join although he doesn't really agree with decision.  He has remarked "I hope I win the lottery so you don't need to re-join the army."

My other family members are largely indifferent one way or the other.  They have roughly that "That's nice" attitude.

My friends are mainly supportive and think it'll be cool to be able to say "I have a buddy who's an officer in the army."


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## mudeater (18 Aug 2006)

Be PROUD. You just joined the greatest family in the world. People's reaction will be mixed, depending on your life situation. IE, are you a student, or are you leaving a $88,000 a year job. Service to the CF comes from YOUR heart and no one else's. From my experience, most people will be proud, some may not say it, but your CF family is the only one who will truly understand. Welcome!


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## hopeful_officer_girl (18 Aug 2006)

I really haven't had any "bad" experiences.   My parents are pretty supportive too. Even though my mother would prefer that I just get a "normal" job, my dad was the one who encouraged me to apply to the Air Force. Other family members were pretty surprised but largely indifferent. All my other friends that I have told were nothing but supportive and pretty curious about what I wanted to do.  

mudeater is completely right. If you want to do this, then it shouldn't really matter what others think about it. Just follow your heart and join up.


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## Springroll (18 Aug 2006)

LeonTheNeon said:
			
		

> My wife is very supportive.  She knows and firmly believes that I was meant for military service.  My kids are happy for me because they know that this is my calling, but they are sad that I'll be away from home.



This is similar to my family, except its my husband, not a wife...lol
My family is all very supportive of this decision of mine.


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## ThainC (18 Aug 2006)

I guess most of my friends and family just saw it as a natural part of my evolution, and if anything, have asked what has taken me so long.  My parents learned that "disapproving" doesn't change anything.  I think they learned this when I bought my first motorcycle, so now they understand that support is the best thing.  About the only thing I typically get is worry... They all watch the news (such a lovely trap for the public - "info"tainment), and when they learn I plan to go into the Infantry, they usually just express worry about my safety.  Other than that... everyone has been supportive of me.

CST


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## matty101 (18 Aug 2006)

I've had a lot of positive responses since I decided to join.  They all share a concern for my safety of course.  The only people I have ever had any problems with are the super left wing people that take offence to Canada even having a military and those conversations are short anyway.  If you feel strongly about becoming a soldier than I say go for it.

MTH


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## Shamrock (18 Aug 2006)

I've had some mild to negative reactions.

I first joined shortly after the Somalia Affair hit the fan right out of high school.  Public opinion of the Forces was at an all time low.  Friends that I had for years suddenly stopped wanting to talk to me; one even called me a chained dog (this even before I had gone on basic).  Of course, this was from the highly educated, well informed opinion of high school kids.  Read: they saw some stuff in the news that had been biased & edited by the media and they emulated the opinions.

Since then, I've had similar things.  Having a normal conversation, then some-one asks what I do.  Fade to polite smile.  This week, I was talking to someone about her intended work with a humanitarian relief organization in Central America.  I had discussed work I had alongside with the Red Cross, and she enquired why I was working _alongside_ the Cross and not _with_.  Regardless of all the Aides-to-civil power I had participated in, regardless of all the times I had escorted convoys or helped transport Red Cross supplies, regardless to my own domestic volunteering & civil services, I was _military_ and that was wrong.  I wished her luck with the Zapatistas and she asked what some 70's musician had to do with anything.

I've had experiences on the other end of the spectrum that have made my skin crawl, including stuff like random people encouraging me to go kill (derogatory terms for Muslim, Balkan, Russian, non-Christian, native, whatever) people.  Their enthusiasm was the worst.

I had a similar conversation with a relative of mine that ended on a more comical note when I asked if he, as a miner, ever faced anything like that. "Nope," he said.  So I called him a Gaea Rapist.


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## Trinity (18 Aug 2006)

Everyone laughed at me when I said I was joining as a Private

That was 13 years ago.

My promotion to Capt is just waiting on the paper work.


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## Centurian1985 (18 Aug 2006)

I joined up, did my 20, got my pension, and my family still  thinks I was crazy to join.  They were proud that I served, but still don't understand why I enjoyed it...  :


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## Trinity (18 Aug 2006)

Centurian1985 said:
			
		

> I joined up, did my 20, got my pension, and my family still  thinks I was crazy to join.  They were proud that I served, but still don't understand why I enjoyed it...  :



But they enjoy the pension...  : :


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## Dirt Digger (18 Aug 2006)

Father was Navy, grandfather was Navy, sister is Navy, mother worked at a school for Navy kids.

So I joined the Army...sister's boyfriend (now husband) convinced me I wanted to be with the C Scot R.

As for people's reactions, I'm currently working a summer work term for my Masters program.  Many of the people in the company I work for are amazed that I actually want to go back to Afghanistan...like I have a death-wish or something.  Unfortunately, I went and stuck myself into a trade that rarely deploys, so actually getting overseas seems to be a fight...if you can believe that.  

I also deal with some students in my program that are really out of touch with the way things work in the real world.  Amazed that I read the National Post (free on campus), that I support gay rights and that I pay taxes.  For the most part, they're a good bunch...they've just never met anyone in the CF.


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## brisebois109 (18 Aug 2006)

I just joined this summer and I was lucky that most of the people around me were very supportive.  I had been investigating a career with the military since I was in grade nine so for three years now so everyone around me was pretty well prepped when I did join.  My mother however was not as supportive as she was more or less just worried that I would be routinely put in harms way but all I did was explain to her that this was my life and that serving my country was the way that I wanted to spend my life.  Although, if I am meeting new people and they ask what I do, I tell them that I am in the army reserves and I do prepare myself for them attacking me verbally.  They are all entitled to their opinions just as you are entitled to yours, I let them have their say, I let their comments roll off my back and I remember that there are MANY people out there that do support the military, you just have to be looking in the right places.


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## paracowboy (18 Aug 2006)

baudspeed said:
			
		

> At which time, i feel somewhat out of place.


like a sheepdog in the middle of a flock of sheep? Don't worry about it. You feel out of place because you *are* out of place. You don't belong with the sheep. You belong with us, watching over them. You'll feel better once you're with your own kind.


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## JBP (18 Aug 2006)

paracowboy said:
			
		

> like a sheepdog in the middle of a flock of sheep? Don't worry about it. You feel out of place because you *are* out of place. You don't belong with the sheep. You belong with us, watching over them. You'll feel better once you're with your own kind.



Para, beautifully said! Couldn't have found a better way to word it anywhere! Nicely done!


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## Devlin (18 Aug 2006)

Para ...someone should be paying you a lot of money to write books, well said.

I experienced all sorts of attitudes, from the extremely positive and thankful folks to the opposite end of the spectrum. If you know it's right for you then do it and do it as well as you are capable of. Be proud, look sharp, necks pressed back in the collar, swing your arms.... as a certain member of my DS in Pet used to say to us every morning. That has stuck with me over the years.

The fact that your questioning the people with the less than shining responses to your decision should re-affirm that you have made the correct choice for yourself. Welcome to the family.


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## Centurian1985 (18 Aug 2006)

Trinity said:
			
		

> But they enjoy the pension...  : :



Actually its the parents and siblings who dont understand...and yes they do envy that pension!   ;D


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## paracowboy (18 Aug 2006)

Devlin said:
			
		

> Para ...someone should be paying you a lot of money


that's what* I* keep saying!


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## Michael OLeary (19 Aug 2006)

paracowboy said:
			
		

> that's what* I* keep saying!



Well, we would pay him, here at Army.ca, but since he went pro we could never afford his morale super-model union rate wage scale.  So, we can only keep him on staff as long as he does it as a charitable work.


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## WannaBeFlyer (19 Aug 2006)

> I have a question regarding how people around you acted when you stated that you were going to join the CF?



What I said: I applied to become a Pilot with the Canadian Forces.

What I heard from:

- Mom: Oh....(she took her time, then sat down)...Well you have always wanted to do that......(30 seconds) Would you have to go to Afghanistan? Followed by "Shoot a gun?" 
- Dad: What!?! GOOD FOR YOU! Your 31 so that is what 28 years of wanting to get in? 
- Friends: 
            a. *Oh.*........like.......the military?..........huh..........Two burgers or a burger and a dog?
            b.  Oh.....would you have to fly sea kings? (I'm sure Inch would love that one and yes, I heard it several times)
            c. Would you have to go to Afghanistan? 
            d. Why would you want to do that? (Usually precedes question b.) This is my LEAST favorite.
            e. But what about your wife/daughter? You will definitely get a divorce. (Although my wife says if I don't re-apply, I probably will  )
            e. You are set man with your current job, don't do that! (I work for "club fed". I hate it. )            
            f. Would you get to fly the CF-16? 

            

Its tough. Specially when everybody is telling you that you are "set" and that you are crazy. The only one who has truly supported and encouraged me is my wife.


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## IrishCanuck (19 Aug 2006)

As I'm in the process of getting all my information together to make the application smooth, as well as preparing for 2nd year university, I haven't posted much lately, but so far my experience even before applying has been as follows:

Father - Supportive, wants me to be happy and fufilled , no matter what the job. Even though he has a very well paying managerial job, he doesnt truly love it, so he wants me just to be happy.

Mother- Largely pessimistic and non-supportive. Oddly enough she was fine with me wanting to be a police officer.. but once I started talking about the CF she got all worked up and thought I was going to be sent off to die. I still really don't know how to handle her, no matter how rationally I explain things, it just must be the mother in her.

Siblings - Indifferent

Friends - Range from "that's awesome, I wish I had the commitment to do something like that! " to "you want to be a meathead huh? well whatever floats your boat."

Some very odd comments all around.. seing as I was going to apply to the Air Force.. one thing is for sure.. people seem to hold a VERY unfair view of the infantry.. and that's just not right.


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## bbob (19 Aug 2006)

I recently started a new job, and when I told my boss I was a reservist he was shocked.  
"Why do you want to be a jarhead?  : If you really want to see some action you should join south of the border. You should quit that junk and get a trade. Then you can make some real money."

Needless to say I smiled and laughed, but basically I just wanted to knock him out.


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## WannaBeFlyer (19 Aug 2006)

bbob said:
			
		

> I recently started a new job, and when I told my boss I was a reservist he was shocked.
> "Why do you want to be a jarhead?  : If you really want to see some action you should join south of the border. You should quit that junk and get a trade. Then you can make some real money."
> 
> Needless to say I smiled and laughed, but basically I just wanted to knock him out.



 : I love hearing my employers views on the CF (both current and past.)  I tried to join the reserves a number of years ago and they said again "Why would you want to do that?" All I could think of was "because I don't want to end up like you."


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## Rice0031 (19 Aug 2006)

I got all sorts of comments, like everyone else.
Some common ones I get:
- "...do you want to go to Afghanistan or something???"
- "why? you're almost done college!"
- "So... you get to shoot guns?"
- "If you join, are you going to be sent to Iraq? That's so stupid" (this one jars me the most, if you're going to have an opinion, at least have an educated one)

My parents don't really support it. I am not really sure if they respect it or not.
My grandfather thinks its great (world war II experience).

I personally, cannot wait to get started


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## exsemjingo (19 Aug 2006)

I have a story for this one.  
I have been going for D.E.O. infantry since December '05, and when I finally got a job offer last week, it really hit the fan:

Muddah:  "You can't go; St. Jean is too far away.  I'm afraid for your safety."

Faddar:  "The army is only recruiting to replace all the people that got killed in Afghanistan.  Once you get out, you will have zero   job prospects.  Do you think these pay rates are good wages?"  (Shows the base pay tables, which everyone gets with their recruiting package).  I did not tell him that there are bonuses and allowances and what not.  "Whatever they are selling you is just a ploy."  I did not tell him how the impetus behind my decision comes entirely from me.  Once dad starts laying down an indictment of an institution, there is no stopping him.

Aunt:  When I told her of my intention to join, with my wife in tow... "If you do that, I'll smack the both of you."

Grandmother:  "I'm praying you don't get in."

In laws:  "...."  Both had their fathers conscripted into the German army to fight in operation Barbarossa.  One didn't come back.  They can neither admit this, nor realize that they were able to find freedom in Canada due to the efforts of our soldiers. 

In the end, I'm off to camp Grenada... er... St.Jean, in January because the army offers a job that I will enjoy, in a field I believe in, for a salary that will support my wife and children.  Comming to terms with my family's disagreement helps me come to terms with domestic detractors, and of course, the enemy's consistant opposition.


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## Blindspot (19 Aug 2006)

When people ask if you have a deathwish for wanting to join-up, just reply: "Do you know that more people have been murdered by handgun in Toronto in the last six months than Canadians killed in Afghanistan in the last four years?"


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## Dissident (19 Aug 2006)

The girlfriend at the time thought it was a really bad idea. Then she stopped complaining about it, becaus eshe realized how much it meant to me. Then three years later she came out and asked me if I was tired of it yet, she figured it was just a phase. 

I now have a new girlfriend (a reserve cpl) and I am so much more happy.


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## GO!!! (19 Aug 2006)

I find that people who bash your choice of employer (especially in the infantry) are usually breathtakingly ignorant to the job we do. 

Try asking these doubting Thomas' if they actually know anything about the CF, Army or infantry, if they can name an operation, anything really. Most of them are secure in their misconception that we are a mob of poorly paid rubes, marching obediently off to die at the whims of our political masters. I guess no-one told them that Cpls make 50K + a year, and everyone else more than that...

These are undoubtedly the same people who would snort with derision when I tell them "I'll be retired at 39 - mortgage paid off, looking for a new job - having travelled the world, my own country and driven myself physically and mentally to the breaking point. Do you know how much of anything you can do? Did you ever test the limits? Did'nt think so, enjoy windowless cubicle #405, I have to jump out of a plane tomorrow!!" 

The month of paid vacation and nice perks like free education, med/dent plans and a network of friends who can do just about anything helps too!

One of the things I like the most about the army is that it is largely filled with "real" people; the kind that do what they say they will, and are'nt all talk about things they know nothing about.


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## LeonTheNeon (19 Aug 2006)

+1 to that GO!!!


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## Devlin (19 Aug 2006)

GO!!! said:
			
		

> One of the things I like the most about the army is that it is largely filled with "real" people; the kind that do what they say they will, and are'nt all talk about things they know nothing about.



Too true Go, this is what I like about it as well. There's very little BS between the troops and when someone says they are going to do something 9 times out of 10 it is done.


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## lukek22 (19 Aug 2006)

I've received a lot of different opinions, but I find they generally revolve around the ignorance/intelligence of a person.  My family is generally supportive, but understandably worried a bit.  Non-Family, seem to not appreciate the decision as much, It's the same as with anything else, most people grab an opinion based on what the liberal media spoon feeds them and keep it until they are given another.  I wouldn't take it too seriously, like it was said earlier, they're just sheep.  I do appreciate the civilians who are smart enough to understand the situations and not just say we appreciate our soldiers blindly.


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## Magravan (19 Aug 2006)

I've had some positive "We have faith in you. You're doing a good thing. You're going to be a great pilot" and very good support from my wife who has made it clear that she would prefer I picked a different path, but will support me in the one that I chose.

I've also had some negative commentary... Solely out of worry, really. 

It really is a unique career choice in a lot of ways... You'll find people that wouldn't care if you chose to be a used car salesman, a banker, a telemarketer suddenly have an opinion about what is best for you.

Regardless though, those of us who have joined or are joining are doing it for our own reasons. The support is great, and even the worry makes you realize that people care about your safety.


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## Sneaky147 (20 Aug 2006)

People gave me the same reaction when I told them I was joining.  They weren't really sure what to think.  The fact is, all most people have is some half-baked preconception of what the Canadian Forces, or any military, really is.  

NOW... they turn green when they find out:

-  I have a boss who I follow because I want to, not because I have to.  He's a leader with experience I learn from, and he cares about my well-being and takes care of me.   
-  I have been in the military for 4 years and I'm pulling $50k (spec pay) and I get 20 days of leave a year.  
-  I LOVE my job.

All of my friends are university educated.  All of my friends work in cubicles, all of my friends hate their bosses, none of them are experiencing job satisfaction, security, or company loyalty.  

You made a great choice.  You are going to have experiences and gain knowledge you can't buy or fake.  You are going to do a job that counts, and you'll hold your head higher than ever before because of it.  Ask your friends what they think THEN!

Cheers


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## brihard (20 Aug 2006)

I suppose I got lucky on the supportive thing... Mom was a captain in the nurses up until she had me, dad's a retired log O who got out a few years ago, stepmom's a log O who's over in the sandbox right now, my great uncle was a mechanic with the C.F. in Germany, great grandfather was a gunner in WW2... Suffice to say that military service is not unusual in my family.  Some were quite surprised when I joined  - I'd previously decided I wanted nothing to do with the military life (yeah yeah, I know, 'reserves!')- but they were universally proud and supportive. I was in Gr. 12 at the time, and a lot of my buddies were kind of jealous of the stuff I got to do. A few of my friends at school thought I was messed up of course, but statistically everyone's bound to have a few friends who don't approve. My girlfriend at the time wasn't happy with me being away for courses, but she supported me too.

*shrug* Like I said, I guess I was just really lucky. I haven't looked back. A few more years of school and then hopefully I can get a tour under my belt.


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## paracowboy (20 Aug 2006)

Sneaky147 said:
			
		

> -  I have been in the military for 4 years and I'm pulling $50k (spec pay) and I get 20 days of leave a year.


remind them of this too:  "I get 20 days of paid  leave a year" I love that look they get when they hear that.


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## Canadian Sig (20 Aug 2006)

paracowboy said:
			
		

> remind them of this too:  "I get 20 days of paid  leave a year" I love that look they get when they hear that.



Then explain what shorts and specials are  . I will be off (all totaled) probably close to 6 or 8 weeks this year..lol. I have long said that the recruiting system just needs to explain the money and time off and to take pics of all the new cars and trucks outside of the shacks a few weeks after tour.


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## baudspeed (21 Aug 2006)

Wow....
I cant beleive the response to my question. I really appreciate the support guys (and gals). Its been kinda weird around my freinds/co-workers lately, but this was a great pickmeup. A few more months and i will be in a position to start the paper work. (ie will be in peak shape).

Thanks a bunch for the perspective!


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## Blackthorne (21 Aug 2006)

paracowboy said:
			
		

> like a sheepdog in the middle of a flock of sheep? Don't worry about it. You feel out of place because you *are* out of place. You don't belong with the sheep. You belong with us, watching over them. You'll feel better once you're with your own kind.



You just helped me figure out WHY I really want to join. It's not because of some movie. It's not because of anything I have ever read, watched or been exposed to.

I just feel like I am a soldier. Especially when I am around real soldiers and vets. And even more so when I'm NOT.

Thank you for your comment. I hope one day my vision is as clear as yours.


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## radop215 (21 Aug 2006)

As a young signalman, I was posted to Calgary right out of the school.  I was prouder than anything you could imagine.  This was right around the time of the Somalia affair.  I was on my way to the bank in the old garrison dress when i walked by a lady pushing a baby carriage.  I nodded politely to her and she promptly spit on me and called me a baby killer.  I have never been so shook in my life.  When I got back to the Sqn and told my friends what had happened the traditional bashing of ignorant civvies occurred.  What made me feel better was the fact that I was surrounded by my friends, people who knew and understood what we do and why.  We went drinking that night and forgot all about babykillers and other such nonsense.  You meet your best friends in the army.  Every posting I meet new and wonderful people and make more great friends.  You go for years without seeing some of the dudes that you were with in 93-96, you do a quick half hour of catch up, and youre best friends again.  Every now and then I run into an old school chum and we exchange pleasantries but most of them have no idea whats its like soldiering.  They nod there when I tell a story but can never come up with any story of their own.  Poor people that experience Groundhog Day for a very long period of their lives.  We most certainly are our own kind.


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## Lawless (21 Aug 2006)

I feel the Army is my calling in life .. unfortunatley my wife does not think the same. She feels she didn't marry me, to be away for long periods of time. I currently work during the week loading trucks, but I find it meaningless .. I'd rather put my skills to a better cause. I obviously have alot of things to ponder, but reading this topic has helped put things into perspective.


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## Chaz (22 Aug 2006)

I have people in my life who agree and disagree with my choice of joining the infantry. 
My grandma for one. When I told her I was in the recruiting process, I could hear the objectivness in her voice. 

Today, I finally finished all the tests and interviews. I passed my fitness test at the Y. So I called her to tell her as she asked me to keep her updated. After I told her I was just now waiting for the call (hopefully to be sworn in) we talked for a few more mintues and hung up.
A few mintues later, she called me back. She said she was just worried about "something happening", and then told me that she was proud of me. 
See, there ya have it. 
If your family and friends love you, they will eventually see the light. 
You did.
That's why your here.


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## GO!!! (22 Aug 2006)

baudspeed said:
			
		

> Wow....
> I cant beleive the response to my question. I really appreciate the support guys (and gals). Its been kinda weird around my freinds/co-workers lately, but this was a great pickmeup. A few more months and i will be in a position to start the paper work. (ie will be in peak shape).
> 
> Thanks a bunch for the perspective!



If you meet the minimum requirements now, apply now. The application process can take up to *TWO YEARS*, you will have plenty of time to get into peak shape while waiting for your security clearance, offer etc.


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## Zell_Dietrich (22 Aug 2006)

Well when I first started the process of joining (10 Months ago) I didn’t think it would affect any of my friendships.  By and large I was right.  I had a few very negative reactions.  Mostly the friends I met through the NDP (Yes I volunteered),  wow,  I didn’t know I knew so many freak shows.  (Apparently Afghanistan was a civil war and we have no right to be there but Darfur is a crisis we should send troops to even though one side doesn’t want us there, we wouldn’t do much good anyways and … grrr I’m stopping now)  I honestly lost all respect I ever had for them, and it made me sad.  (I console myself by visualizing them choking on their own undeserved sense of self satisfaction.)

I know a few of my Afghan friends felt uncomfortable, but it quickly went away. *shrug* (They kind of figured out why I was practicing my Dari out on them)

But yea, 99.99% of the people I know aren’t even involved enough to be ambivalent. Which reminds me,  I’m doing it for me,  not them.  Besides I’ve just spent the last 10 months going through a process similar to chewing on tinfoil to do this,  what do I care what others think.


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## ClaytonD (22 Aug 2006)

Well, surprisingly, alot of my friends (Who are anti-war) have been understanding. They don't like it but they understood, mainly because they are my friends and they are good ones. I've obviously got stupid answers (Mostly not from my anti-war friends) like:

- I'd join but I don't want to die. (I usually just say 'good job' to this answer)
- Man you're gonna shoot some s***-n******! (As if it's a good thing)
- Think of what you'll leave behind! (I usually tell them I can take my computer with me =) )
- Man army is stupid you're gonna have such a good chance of dying. I'm gonna join the police. (I also reply with 'good job')
- Why would you want to go to Afghanistan?

It's weird for me because the people I know who you would expect to say 'Hey that's great' are actually not very supportive.
My Dad thinks I should join something that involves maybe a trade or something like that, (Engineers, Mechanics and the like)
My Mom doesn't mind me joining but the mother in her obviously worries.

My grandma hates it and my grandpa did too. (They are WWII/Depression people and I think it's more than understandable in some cases why they wouldn't support it.)


But to be fair, my reaction has been mainly positive, or supportive.


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## WebAddict (22 Aug 2006)

My girl, surpirisingly supported me, she knew its wat i wanted to get into, and that i take sh*t sirously
 My family didnt really care, they just said "yeah its gonan be hard"
My grandparents were mad, but i dont care they dont live with me

My cuzin is in the army , so he was happy :


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## jmnavy (22 Aug 2006)

GO!!! said:
			
		

> I'll be retired at 39 - mortgage paid off, looking for a new job - having travelled the world, my own country and driven myself physically and mentally to the breaking point.



I hate it when people think that's a negative thing, like it's something they're better off avoiding.  Well said GO!!!  

Most of my friends have been pretty supportive, although most of them would never make the same choice I've made.  I've spent a few years in the reserves before transfering to reg force so I think most of my friends felt that I knew what I was getting myself into.  Some things I get a lot
- Wow, a pilot in the air force... so you're, like, joining the army  :blotto:
- So you would kill someone?
- So you could be in afghanistan soon couldn't you?  (I'm leaving for botc on Friday, so no)
- So you did all that school for nothing?  (HA!)

My father's very proud of my choice.  My mom's worried, but her brother is just finishing up his career as a tac hel pilot so she knows what's involved.  The thing that's reassured me the most about my choice is that, without exception, the people who've been the most happy for me are the men and women I've met who're already in the forces.  Not just pilots, everyone.

I was at a bar last night and heard two waiters talking.  One of them was trying to get the other to stop complaining about work because "_nobody_ likes working."  I just laughed to myself.


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## Trooper Hale (22 Aug 2006)

One of the guys here has a quote as his signature that follows basically like this. 
Johnny Noclue - "Why'd you join the army?"
Awesome Forces guy "Because i just found i didnt have enough digging, shooting, blowing stuff up, driving armoured vehicles and doing awesomely cool stuff in my life".
I find that gets people off your back. For me personally when someone asks me about it, you can tell almost straight away how they feel about the forces, if its positive i talk to them. If its negative and i dont want to argue with the person then i use humour to get them to see i'm not the baby killing, woman murdering, innocent basher that they might want me to be...Then i change the topic. To some people its not worth explaining, to others you can really show them what a top job we do and they appreciate it.
I had a mixed reaction from my family when i joined up, my dad didnt want to talk to me for a fair while (He's a buddhist and when i said i was thinking about joining didnt get the greatest reaction from him) but he's really good about it now, he realises i love my job, i'm in Canada doing it and he likes that i've got a career ahead of me.
You've got to choose your battles when it comes to talking to people, but if its just pure ignorance through a lack of education about the forces you can talk to them, show them, tell them and make them see that we do a great job.


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## acclenticularis (22 Aug 2006)

I am now into my second incarnation in the CF.  The first time around I was quite young, fresh from civi U. and my parents and friends thought I was crazy.   They understood nothing of the CF.  The second time around,  they were thrilled at my return.  So much so that they encouraged my much younger brother to join.  In my family's case, it was ignorance that scared some, offended others.  There was a fair bit of anti-military bias that had been fed by the media that they latched onto.


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## canadianblue (22 Aug 2006)

I find that people's attitudes do change somewhat, usually more negative so far from civilians. I'd rather be treated like any other regular person, but usually they can tell by the haircut, and when one idiot in the military does something stupid it unfortunately reflects on the rest of the CF. Personally, while some do love the army, I would never encourage my kids to join the regular force until they matured enough and had post secondary under their belt.


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## spqr (23 Aug 2006)

This is an angle thatI was looking for in here.

I currently work for a largeish organization as a manager and have about 200 staff of supervisors and frontline folks that I am responsioble for.  In the organization there are two other mangers at my level and I haven't told them that I have applied yet.  I told the CEO who is my direct supervisor but I am fearful of passing the news around to a larger audience at work because I know that my ideas and planning will get shelved as I would become a lameduck.  I know its the same for anyone who is planning a move out of an organization but  because of how long the process takes I just don't want to be ineffective for several months.

I know from office talk that these folks totally respect the army and what they do.  Its a really liberal/academic environment, in the true sense - not the false sense, like at a university (more closed minds there than at the morgue).  The people there respect me and my choices in all things and will be totally in for it.  I just don't want the five months+ departure to be a hinderance on my team and leave them in limbo while I run the gauntlet of the application.

As for others...
My brother in law is just finishing the RCMP training and he is jazzed about it.  ("Theres this guy here who used to be in the army and when he shoots, holy crap its good.  He told us he didn't even use pistols, just rifles,  but damn!"

My wife is worried about the time away (who's isn't?) but is happy that I'll be doing what I want and is looking forward to living in montreal during language training.  I swear to god shes even excited about a posting in Shilo or Pet.  We are outdoor hounds and don't really care about the city life.

My mom and grandma are very proud of my choice.  My Grandfather was a vet and he left a good legacy.

My friends are all for it.  My best friends has a brother in the Navy as a diver and lives vicariously through his life as a super sexy newfoundland diver that gets all the fat chicks from the bay.

My mother in law is another story... She has two grandkids.  My 6 month son and my brother in laws(RCMP guy) 7 month son.  They just got posted to Thompson MB, (we are all northern albertans) and now I'm going to get posted to some place really far away and then get killed thereby ruining my son.  I am taking her grandchild away from her and that is the end of the world.
...to her,... I just say Westjet.  I hate to say it because a day with her visiting is a day I want to cut my toesoff and sew them back on by myself.

rob


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## oftengone (23 Aug 2006)

You know people just don't understand what the CF is all about. They only see what they want to see. I'm a military brat, and even if I didn't join it's still the best family in the world.  No matter what you're going through or even what you are feeling, there's a good chance that they went through it also.
Nothing can replace the feeling of belongning somewhere, and being with people that understand you and that are in the same boat as you.
Don't worry about what everyone else says, if it's you're calling, you feel it in your bones and in your heart.  Remember, you have to love you job since you'll spend 90% of your life doing it.  From experience with the military family, no one that I meet ever regretted it.

Welcome to the family


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## I_am_John_Galt (23 Aug 2006)

paracowboy said:
			
		

> like a sheepdog in the middle of a flock of sheep? Don't worry about it. You feel out of place because you *are* out of place. You don't belong with the sheep. You belong with us, watching over them. You'll feel better once you're with your own kind.



I suspect you are referring (intentionally?) to this essay by Lt. Col. Dave Grossman, U.S. Army (Ret.) , which I've sent to a few people ... someone probably already posted it here somewhere, so here's just a sampling:



> If you have no capacity for violence then you are a healthy productive citizen, a sheep. If you have a capacity for violence and no empathy for your fellow citizens, then you have defined an aggressive sociopath, a wolf. But what if you have a capacity for violence, and a deep love for your fellow citizens? What do you have then? A sheepdog, a warrior, someone who is walking the hero's path. Someone who can walk into the heart of darkness, into the universal human phobia, and walk out unscathed.
> 
> Let me expand on this old soldier's excellent model of the sheep, wolves, and sheepdogs. We know that the sheep live in denial, which is what makes them sheep. They do not want to believe that there is evil in the world. They can accept the fact that fires can happen, which is why they want fire extinguishers, fire sprinklers, fire alarms and fire exits throughout their kids' schools.
> 
> But many of them are outraged at the idea of putting an armed police officer in their kid's school. Our children are thousands of times more likely to be killed or seriously injured by school violence than fire, but the sheep's only response to the possibility of violence is denial. The idea of someone coming to kill or harm their child is just too hard, and so they chose the path of denial.


  http://www.blackfive.net/main/2004/10/i_only_hang_wit.html


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## paracowboy (23 Aug 2006)

I_am_John_Galt said:
			
		

> I suspect you are referring (intentionally?) to this essay by Lt. Col. Dave Grossman, U.S. Army (Ret.)


constantly


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## canadianblue (23 Aug 2006)

> You know people just don't understand what the CF is all about. They only see what they want to see. I'm a military brat, and even if I didn't join it's still the best family in the world.  No matter what you're going through or even what you are feeling, there's a good chance that they went through it also.
> Nothing can replace the feeling of belongning somewhere, and being with people that understand you and that are in the same boat as you.
> Don't worry about what everyone else says, if it's you're calling, you feel it in your bones and in your heart.  Remember, you have to love you job since you'll spend 90% of your life doing it.  From experience with the military family, no one that I meet ever regretted it.
> 
> Welcome to the family



Personally, nothing will ever replace my real family. I did have that kind of family atmosphere while I was in basic, but since then not as much, don't get me wrong their is still some cameradrie. I still find that this life is more or less just a job, thats it. Personally I would have been just as happy, or even happier doing my previous job.


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## I_am_John_Galt (25 Aug 2006)

paracowboy said:
			
		

> constantly



Right on! ... He put it into words a hundred times better than I ever could have.


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## dont.get.it.48 (25 Aug 2006)

baudspeed said:
			
		

> I have a question regarding how people around you acted when you stated that you were going to join the CF? I have  had such a large mixed reaction from friends and family that i felt at times that maybe i was being crazy. I am joining because i am (what i consider) well read on what Canada has done for the world, and want to participate, even if that means I am put in harms way.
> However, when i tell them that i am making a career change, they smile and encourage me to be adventurous, then when they ask what i will be doing, and i tell them that i am intending to give the army some of my time, their faces drop and i get the 'Thats nice' smile, and the conversation stalls out. At which time, i feel somewhat out of place.
> 
> Anyone else had experiences like this? does it end once you are in? Am I the only one who is in this boat?




yeah, I'm still going through it. My whole family doesn't like it and tries to convince me not to. aside from my family most of my friends don't want me joining either, allot of them just don't say anything (thankfully) because the know this is what i want to do so the support that fact not the joining that military part.
every ones in awhile you get some people that fully support you, but that's not to often at all.
I've gotten some pretty ignorant things said to me before when some people heard i applied too, the worst one was "i hope you get shot or step on a land mine". Then ones you join I've heard from some soldiers you'll have some people spit on you, and call you a baby killer, etc... 
but if you really want to join, you will just set aside everyones opinions and comments, not matter how bad they are and just do it.
it's your life and if this is want you want to do with it then that's awesome. 
it's not a job to get rich off of, it's a job to help people and to be proud of what you do and make a difference.


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## Zarathustra (26 Aug 2006)

Comments I got were mostly negative. Many people said I was too smart for the army, especially the infantry. *Lil* I'm not smart enough to understand why stupidity is an asset in war, so I should be OK. Some were concerned for my safety. Some are not big fan of violence, or obeying politicians. Politicians have very low public esteem these days. 

But some comments were positive. I'm just turned 30 and I felt some guys would love to throw their current life at the window and start something new like me. Others seem impressed that I volunteered for something that hard. And some understand that we need armed forces and respect the work that has been done oversea over the last years. 

I don't think everyone would like this kind of job, but I'm not asking them to join with me either, so it should be OK.


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## honestyrules (26 Aug 2006)

When I joined, I experienced the same kind of cr*p. I'm glad I did join anyway.

I went to tech. college and stuff, you know, some go to university , and at some point in their life, they want something new, just like me. There is nothing wrong with this. 

Now, I regret I didn't join earlier in my life. There is nothing like the army in the civvie world. You go places and do things you'll remember for life. I'm not saying that the military is perfect or anything, but it's different alright!
Your peers will adjust.


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## ChaosTheory (27 Aug 2006)

Like most people I have had a mixture of opinions from my family and friends.  I joined the army this year through the ROTP, me being a CELE.  My best friend was supposed to apply with me but he got talked out of it by his family telling him the Army isn't as good as they are saying.  So now I am going to University to get a full Bachelors and it is all being paid for while he is going to a college to get a diploma which he has to pay for himself with the help of his RESPs.  So during the summers, he has to work at Safeway while I will be doing something much more interesting, IAP/BOTC/SLT or my job training.

My father used to drive a Leopard out in Gagetown and he was married to my mother at the time so they were fine with me joining.  Infact they were the ones who told me about the ROTP program.

My brothers, they are a bit young to understand.  They just think it is cool that I am in the CF.  I am trying to convince my youngest brother to try and join Reserves at 16 or Reg Forces as infantry when he is out of high school.  That is still a while to go so we will see what happens.

My one set of grandparents never really told me or gave any signs of their opinion on my joining.  My other grandparents were born and lived in Europe, they are always asking me when I am getting out of the army and what I am going to do when my contract expires.  When I tell them that I will just resign they don't believe it.

My Aunts and Uncles are supportive of me too.  My one uncle who has had drug and alcohol problems actually told me that he was proud of what I was doing and he wanted me to know that.

My friends are supportive of my joining, they know that I believe everyone should be in the military for some period in their life and they are totally behind me, albeit, they are worried that I could die.

My peers who are not so close to me, have told me a variety of things.  I have been told that I am now owned by the CF and that I am their b****.  I have been told I am going to Afghanistan/Iraq and I am going to die.  I have been told I have a deathwish.  The best of the worst things that people have told me: I was telling this kid about how I am in the army explaining to him about the ROTP program.  He started telling me that he was thinking about joining but he decided to get a "real" job and that I would never learn any life skills by joining the army.

My employer was very supportive of me.  She actually took the time to write me a letter of recommendation for the CF.

Teachers, like my high school peers, had very different opinions.  Most of them didn't want to say anything bad to me they just told me be careful and not to get killed.  My one teacher was in the reserves for a good few years so he was the most supportive of me joining.  One substitute teacher was asking my physics class what we were doing after high school, since it was close to grad time.  I told her I was in the military and she actually told me that she had a huge amount of respect toward me.  That is the only time a teacher has said that to me, then again, people who say that could never join themselves.

I think the biggest reason people automatically think that you will die if you join the CF is because they do not know that there are combat and non combat trades.


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## GO!!! (27 Aug 2006)

ChaosTheory said:
			
		

> I think the biggest reason people automatically think that you will die if you join the CF is because they do not know that there are combat and non combat trades.



I think you give them too much credit. 

It always amazes me that students put so much stock in what teachers and guidance councillors say outside of their classroom areas of expertise.

Education is universally regarded as one of the extremely "easy" degrees to get, and a ticket to a safe union job where your aptitude can only ever be measured by your experience.

Yet young people place unlimited stock in what these people say in regards to future career choices and pruded courses of education, training and work. 

Listen to your teachers when they teach you something, but when they talk about the "real world" just nod and smile.


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## Strike (27 Aug 2006)

Wow, waiting for some teachers to get on here and throw a few back at you...


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## warspite (28 Aug 2006)

i've got a ways to go yet but my dad supports me, my mom worries but just wants whats best, my freinds support me and my general family ranges from *you want to what??* to good foryou


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## ClaytonD (28 Aug 2006)

GO!!! said:
			
		

> I think you give them too much credit.
> 
> It always amazes me that students put so much stock in what teachers and guidance councillors say outside of their classroom areas of expertise.
> 
> ...




I don't think that is fair to most teachers to be honest. Just like any job, there are good teachers and bad teachers but, (Now I don't have a bastion of experience in the "real world") I know counsellors/teachers who have spent careers in the military, and teachers that have done tons of things in the 'real world' before becoming teachers.  Now don't get me wrong, some teachers are dolts, but I think I have to disagree on the 'nodding and smiling' part. Because some teachers DO know what they're talking about. Sometimes when they are talking about the real world they actually ARE teaching you something. Should you nod and smile then?

Some teachers will be biased, and some will be ignorant and misinformed, but that just shows a bad teacher who well... Shouldn't be teaching. Personally I think teaching is one of the most respectable jobs in the country right now, along with the military, and if they are giving you ignorant misinformed information about the real world, well then, they aren't really teachers.

Sorry if this doesn't make alot of sense I am kind of rambling.  :-\


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## patrick666 (31 Aug 2006)

The first thing people say when I say I am joining is, "But you'll be sent to Afghanistan and you'll probably be killed". 

I don't understand why people always focus on the negative. The only people who see it as an amazing opportunity to advance my skills, strength and knowledge are my family who support me one hundred percent. 

You live once, do what YOU want.


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## paracowboy (31 Aug 2006)

Patrick H. said:
			
		

> The first thing people say when I say I am joining is, "But you'll be sent to Afghanistan and you'll probably be killed".


tell 'em "Better than Afghanistan coming here, and YOU being killed." 

Then punch them in throat.


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## big bad john (31 Aug 2006)

paracowboy said:
			
		

> tell 'em "Better than Afghanistan coming here, and YOU being killed."
> 
> Then punch them in throat.



Getting mild in your old age +1


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## Collin.t (31 Aug 2006)

Don't blame the population, blame the mass media, they are the ones mainly responsible of giving a bad rep to the canadian forces on pretty much every aspects.


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## Hockeycaper (31 Aug 2006)

paracowboy said:
			
		

> tell 'em "Better than Afghanistan coming here, and YOU being killed."
> 
> Then punch them in throat.


 Great response, but you now owe me a new coffee... and a new monitor.... ;D


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## spud (31 Aug 2006)

paracowboy said:
			
		

> tell 'em "Better than Afghanistan coming here, and YOU being killed."
> 
> Then punch them in throat.



Thank you, that's the funniest thing I have read in a long time!!


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## Cayuga (1 Sep 2006)

Peoples attitudes were one of the most interesting aspect of joining the forces. There was a range of responses and ignorance was a factor on all parts of the spectrum of responses. I was in the last year of University, looking for a job and the Navy was always something that I was interested in, but I was a bit of a nerdy kid in high school so I had discounted it as a career. However after 5 years of university and a load of growing up, I knew it was the job for me.

My Dad was a little surprised, but he was supportive of me in whatever I did. He wanted me to do something with my life and something that I could be proud of. I think for him it was a bit of a surprise that his son was going in the military. It was confirmation that he had done a good job raising me because I was choosing something more than living in a cubicle and to give something to society.

My Mum was pleased that her son was going to be an Officer and that I would look very handsome in my uniform. She was less surprised than my dad was.

My older sister reaction was "WHAT!!! .... .... hmm... i can see you doing that..." It was in Church before the service so there were a heads turning and all... kinda funny. Her husband was very supportive also.
My 2nd older sister was scared that I was going to get myself killed. Her husband wanted to know what cool stuff I would get to do and what the pay was like.

Jr. High and High School friends who I ran into were really surprised. I was on their least likely to join the military list. One of my high school buddies who always talked about joining the air force and flying jets who now has some boring dead end job was rather jealous since I had gone and done what he had only dreamt about. My best friend was like "well you have only wanted to do that for as long as I have known you".

My boss used to be armored and while he thought I was crazy for wanting to go Navy, he was really pumped and he really wanted to be one of my references.

The general other responses were "We have a navy?", " Doesn't West Ed Mall have more submarines than the navy?", "MARS officer, We have a space program?", "You'll never make any money doing that", "Navy eh? That is cool. I thought about going _____ once", "I would join, but I have a family" "So you're going to command a zodiak?", "So are you going to get posted to an aircraft carrier?", "Wow... er Yes,sir, do I have to salute you now?" - followed by some attempt at a salute, " 20 vacation days a year? I have been at the company X years and I just got 3 weeks...", "So when do they make you admiral?", "Why would you want to do THAT?"

Now that I am in, one of the most common lines I hear is "So tell me what you did, so I can live vicariously through you". Most often from people who are 30 something stuck in a job with a really low excitement factor.

I remember at basic, my friends were having a contest about who had done the coolest thing recently... when I said... "I got gassed this morning and fired a rifle this afternoon, including on full automatic..." They were all like "You Win"...

I love my job, even when things suck, I take a step back and think of other things that I could be doing and they are nowhere as cool nor have the 'I get paid to do this' factor


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## patrick666 (1 Sep 2006)

paracowboy - What a perfect response - of course, perfectly puncuated by assaulting their throat. =)  

I think it would be semi-humourous to see dozens of 'terrorists' swimming across the Atlantic in suicide-canoes. 

Anyways, back to the thread.


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## bcbarman (1 Sep 2006)

Love this thread.

This is a bit of a biased forum for this topic, but one that I support wholeheartedly.

I'll use the quote that I shouted at my platoon when I taught basic last summer:

"your friends are out doing construction, working at McDonald's this summer; you are shooting machine guns, making great friends and learning skills that will use the rest of your life, and Getting paid for it!  How can you not love the army?"

Join, if its not for you, 3 years out of your life is nothing.  I do laugh a those that join the infantry, but laughing at the infantry is something that the calvary has been doing for centuries.

Go armour.


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## doomwolf (1 Sep 2006)

I tell people I'm in the Army Reserves and they often go "Is that Cadets?"  I then explain that it's the same idea of the National Guard except we can only go overseas if we volunteer. I haven't had anyone tell me it's a bad idea, I just get a lot of indifference. My parents (esp my mother) are very supportive though, and I'm in the same unit my grandfather was in during WWII, so that comes up whenever we talk. 

Still not sure about doing any tours/going reforce, but I'll get my 3's and a couple years of university under my belt before I worry too much.


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## keaner (1 Sep 2006)

Just to put a different spin on this thread, I've been out of the Regs for going on 5 yrs and now am looking at getting back into the Reserves. I'm doing it for all the good things you have all mentioned - which, I can tell you - simply aren't out on civvie street. 
 - I'm bored silly.
 - Most civvy businesses don't have a sense of urgency (I use that phrase with my subordinates and they look at me funny).
 - I used to look forward to my next day at work.
 - I spent zero time playing office politics.
 - Troops didn't spend all their energy trying to not work while at work.
What the military did give me was the knowledge and confidence to land a Plant Superintendent position after only 3 years as a civvy. Hopefully, I can get the best of both worlds.
The only thing the wife asked when I told her I was geting back in was, "Do you have to go to Afghanistan?" A pretty normal wife worry, I think.


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## Strike (1 Sep 2006)

> I do laugh a those that join the infantry, but laughing at the infantry is something that the calvary has been doing for centuries.



bcbarman, I do believe that you mean cavalry, as opposed to calvary, which has an entirely different meaning.


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## Zell_Dietrich (1 Sep 2006)

.... well If you were where you know who got you know what..... I'd be fairly smug too.  Well not as smug as some of the cavalry guys I know.... but ...

(You know I'm kidding,  I'd never... publicly ... imply that I know any cavalry guys) ;D

http://www.newadvent.org/cathen/03191a.htm


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## George Wallace (1 Sep 2006)

Strike said:
			
		

> bcbarman, I do believe that you mean cavalry, as opposed to calvary, which has an entirely different meaning.



I guess that is his cross to bear.


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## bcbarman (2 Sep 2006)

You are correct sir, I hate spell check some days

[Putting my hand out to get slapped for not saying what I want clearly]


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## Old Sweat (2 Sep 2006)

George,

If no one else is going to groan at your outrageous pun, than I shall.


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## paracowboy (4 Sep 2006)

I was reading some stuff on comic books (did you guys realize that they‘re like 5 bucks a damn comic now? $5! I can remember buying mine for a quarter! And the stuff in them! Freakin‘ soft-core porn! Anyway…), and I found this amusing article. 
http://www.fortunecity.com/tatooine/niven/142/recycleb/rb37.html

Amusing because, with some minor tweaking, it applies so well here. And thus, with minor tweaking included, I present it to you:



> Anti-military types are a particularly repulsive lot. Though inclined by some bizarre delusory self-congratulation to cast themselves as "hippies" (whatever that’s supposed to mean thirty years after the Summer of Love), they’re even worse hypocrites than their predecessors. At least the fools in bell-bottoms had the excuse that nobody had tried this particular tack before, and that they were all whacked out on acid. These fools have no such excuse. We know that the idiocy spawned in 1968, from Flower Power to drug abuse, is just that - idiocy, and cannot work.
> 
> But, they cannot allow themselves to see that. They HAVE to try to claim some sort of moral high ground, since their ridiculous assertions on ANY subject cannot function in reality. So, devoid of a moral compass, they seek to claim moral superiority. By shouting loud enough, they hope to sway others.
> 
> ...


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## MacLeodMP (5 Sep 2006)

I recently joined with the Army and found almost all of my friends to be supportive and all of my family to be negative.
When I told my mother that I would be joining I recivied the following speech 

"We have no business in some Afgani civil-war. Why did I raise a son foolish enough to throw his safety into the care of a poorly-run,
Mismanaged and hypocritical Government? How could you give such unquestionable loyalty to some country?"

To which I simply replied "Because 'that country' gave it's unquestionable loyalty to me."

To me, joining the army was just my way of evening the score, and I've never looked back.


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## baudspeed (5 Sep 2006)

MacLeodMP said:
			
		

> ....I recivied the following speech
> 
> "We have no business in some Afgani civil-war. Why did I raise a son foolish enough to throw his safety into the care of a poorly-run,
> Mismanaged and hypocritical Government? How could you give such unquestionable loyalty to some country?"
> ...



Mac,
I have received the same *almost* angry confrontation from family. I have found this one hardest to deal with, since I consider myself somewhat read on what is going on, i find it hard to explain it to people who watch the news and only see the 1% of info that makes the news.

I agree on the providing loyalty to a country that has provided it to its people. That was very well put.


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## Korus (5 Sep 2006)

You know, I got a similar line from the family when I joined, I got it when I announced that I was slated to deploy to Kandahar. I got a tonne of care packages while I was in Afghanistan, and I got that line again after getting back. You're probably not going to change your family's views, and they just don't want you to get killed for what they feel is a pointless cause.. Very few of my friends understand the entire army thing, much less why I want to go back to Afghanistan, but they know it's something I believe in, and are supportive of me. 

That's just the way it is.. Most of your friends and family outside the military will never fully understand, and may even seem angry with the choices we make in the Military. But that's just a part of being a soldier.


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## ClaytonD (5 Sep 2006)

Well, today I asked my teacher to give me a reference for the reserves, she has former military experience (5th Field Regiment) and said that she would be honored and said that she thinks I would be an excellent candidate for the millitary. Probably the best reaction I've gotten so far. It made me feel way better about joining up =D.


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## patrick666 (6 Sep 2006)

It shouldn't matter how others feel, it is not their life. It matters how YOU feel. We all want our families to be proud of us, we want our friends to be proud to know us but you must have pride in yourself before anything.


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## Collin.t (6 Sep 2006)

I joined because I wanted to, the job is interesting and I like the environment, I love my country but I don't do it for my country, I like my job and I do it well. I don't agree with everything my country does but I will do what I am ask to do.


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## exsemjingo (14 Sep 2006)

Regrettably, I have more to contribute.
A favorite professor of mine called today and asked how I was doing.  He was less than impressed with my plan to join the army, and it really hurt because I have such respect for him.
He was worried about "this business with Afghanistan", and worried about how my wife and daughters would handle separation during training.  "You mean it's in Montreal and New Brunswick?  Golly."
He has taken for granted the peace that our Military's effort has won.  He has discounted the value of an officer's career.  He has also ignored the economic reality which he perpetuates: too many post secondary students spending too much time and too much money to get degrees for jobs that do not exist.  How else shall I make enough money to live?   He should be proud that I was able to use my degree by being accepted for an officer position.  My wife still cannot use her degree.
As far as having children so young... I hope he is happy that out Canadian fertility rate sets us up for negative growth.
I spent the whole evening feeling disappointed, and thought I would cheer myself up here.


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## Magravan (14 Sep 2006)

You've got a number of good points. Sometimes people tend to ignore certain facets that they don't care for, and unfortunately, they make the same condemnations regardless of whether they considered 20% or 95% of the story... Do keep in mind that while part of it is what is being seen on TV, another part is that it is natural for those who care about you to try to protect you from what they see as harm. It may not be a conscious effort, but I suspect that much of the disagreement there is because he respects you and cares for your well being. 

I don't necessarily tell my children that the reason that they are not allowed to stay out too late, or wander too far is because I am worried that someone will harm them in some way, I simply discourage them from doing so, by setting rules, or becoming upset when they stay out too late and I am forced to worry about them. The underlying reason is still because I care about their safety and well being, even when they are being grounded for a week because they didn't follow the rule. 

Try not to let it bum you out too much.


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## baudspeed (14 Sep 2006)

Well,
Just a small update. I have been interacting with my parents lately (i am almost 30 and have a peer type relationship with them), and though they initially had some deep seated issues, it appears that my confidence in this matter has smoothed things over. Not one of my family members has picked up a book or done deeper research than what they are force fed on the CBC and cable, but at least they are trusting my opinion is valid, and are becomming supportive. Thanks for the info on your experiences. I hope this post helps those that are trying to make the same hard decision that had I made.


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## Kat Stevens (14 Sep 2006)

I joined at 17. From my Mum I got "don't be first, but don't be last, either."  From Dad, "What do you mean, you're not gonna be a Guardsman?". From friends, "You're signing your life away."
  After 3 years, I'd seen most of our country, plus a little of a few others.  I had nothing in common with my friends at all, who still thought a trip to Vancouver Island was a major adventure.  I don't regret it all.


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## govenor_mac (14 Sep 2006)

When our son came home in grade 10 saying he WANTED to join the Navy we were estatic.When he graduated grade 12 and said he was JOINING the Navy we were estatic and apprehensive. When he signed on the dotted line we were estatic,apprehensive and so VERY,VERY PROUD! We stand behind him every step of the way. We went through the venting and the'' I want to quit''! phase. Now all we hear is how much he loves it. How could we not be behind him in something he loves and believes in so much.His family and friends are behind him 110%.If and when some day he has to go to the 'sand box' we will stand behind him then too because its the man up above who decides his outcome in life. (be it in the 'sand box' or be it crossing the street).We have to support him in whatever he chooses.


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## luciano (14 Sep 2006)

The feedback I have gotten has mostly been bewteen neutral and positive with most worrying about my safety and going to the sandbox.

Back in college I was considering joining after college and thought my mom would be the hardest sell. One day when she came in to town we saw a couple members in the green camo gear and she commented that I should do that. Well that was easy.

My dad made a comment that I shouldn't join to my mom before I submitted my application, but since doing my testing has been supportive.

My friends are supportive but hope I will change my mind. A couple interesting comments I got was that green isn't my colour (I'm going army) and that a buddy of mine didn't think I had the attitude which I responded that it could be learned.


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## proudnurse (19 Sep 2006)

Here is what I have found...

My Mother: You are going to get sent to war, and we do not belong there. (that is a topic all in itself) 
                 but if this is your choice, I am behind you........ later she just told me she is worried. 

My Father: Good for you! I know that you can do it (His parents: WW2 Veterans)

My Grandmother: If your grandfather was here, he would be so proud, as I am of you now.

My coworkers? One reminded me that she is "glad" her son lost his recruitment package. Another co worker? Her boyfriend is serving in Afganistan and she gave me a hug. 

So, I have gotten mixed reactions. Me? I am not so concerned with what others say, but I am sure that once everyone sees that I am going to put my heart & soul into it, they will be happy as long as I am happy. I am excited about learning new skills, and also serving my country. 

Rebecca


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## tyrone120 (21 Sep 2006)

I get the same sort of reactions from my family and Friends. I am going to serve my country and the needs of others that are less fortunate than me. We need more people in the world that are willing to take a chance on life for the better of others and I'm happy to see there is others out there that think the way I do. 
Tyrone 120


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## Nieghorn (22 Sep 2006)

What a great thread this is!  I think I've wanted to be in the military since my pre-teen days of being an avid reader of history.  In school, I never thought I could do it and worked toward becoming a history teacher.  I'm one of those now (and one of the good ones, re: the comments made above   ), but feeling really bored with the 8-3  -  plus endless hours of 'homework'  - so thinking about doing Reserves when I start an MA degree in Hist.

I'm also one of those people who I think is in tune with what's going on over there, and try to educate my family beyond that which the media shows them.  That is, and I guess always has been, the problem.  If you just rely on the local news to give you the facts, you're lost.  

If (hopefully 'when') I join up, I will also have to deal with less than positive comments from certain members of my family.  However, I think my dad will be impressed, and though my mom will be worried, will be supportive.  I also think my dad's side will be cool as they have a Naval tradition.

. . . I'm sure it'll be a shock to many people, but I've been bored with 'normal' work life for the last four years now and really want a job that's more dynamic and meaningful.  (I won't go into my issues with school teaching, but I eventually want to be a professor, but would like to be in the military for a while at least before that happens.) 

Good luck to all who are dealing with the transition and feedback!


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## tlg (11 Oct 2006)

When my mother and my sister found out I was planning on joining the military (this was last Dec.) they said and I quote "You'll commit suicide if you go to boot camp" to which I replied "Well since I'm not going to boot camp I guess I'm not going to commit suicide". Needless to say I don't talk to either of them much if at all anymore. Most people on the "GOOD" side of the family keep on asking me "Are you sure you want to do this?" to which I reply "What? You think I'm going to commit suicide when I go off to "BOOT CAMP" too?" I live with my step folks and the only one that thinks it's the greatest thing since sliced bread is my father (my step-dad, but he's been around since I was three). My step-mom's mom (makes sense? step-grandmother maybe?) keeps on telling me that she'll come visit me with some general or other she knows, that and she always talks to me now in a very condescending tone. I completed all three parts of the recruiting tests (apt. med. interview) and as of right now I was a conditional offer as long as the medical refferal forms from my past surgeries and my eyes come back clean then I'm good to go.


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## EXBRIT (11 Oct 2006)

WOW!  This thread brings me back.

I joined the Brits.  August 1978.  Walked into the recruiting office in Newcastle Upon Tyne and asked to join.  (18 days later I was on my way to the Light Infantry Depot as a recruit - 18 days!)

I remember my Father being pissed off.  He had lots of bad memories of the service during his National Service (draft) days.  My Mother amazingly enough was supportive!  Her attitude was "if its what you want to do, try it")  My uncles who all served (IE National Service) were supportive and quite proud.  My friends were a mixed bag.  Some thought it was a good thing and they wished they had the balls to do it whilst a few thought I was bonkers!

Generally Brits had more of a supportive attitude towards the Forces, even the educational system though they were a bit condescending.

The first stop in the training system was three days at what was called the Recruit Selection Centre at Sutton Coalfield outside of Birmingham (if memory serves correctly).  There you spent three days seeing films and demos on the various trades in the Brit Army and sat more sophisticated banks of tests then what you took at the recruiting Centre.  On the third day you selected your trade and they would tell you if you were appropriate for that particular job.  (You gave three selections).

One thing I will allways remember was just before being dismissed on the first day the Sgt Maj in charge got us together and told us (or words to the effect)  "lads, this is your first night away from Mummy and Daddy.  Some of you are going to get the sniffles, some of you are thinking maybe your friends wont accept you 'cause your hair is now short and you wear a uniform.   :crybaby:  Some of your plonker friends will call you or have allready called you a ####ing fascist!  You may want to allready go AWOL cause of this.  Dont.  You know why.  Cause all that stuff they called you will mean nuthin' when your sippin' a good beer, watching the sun set over Hong Kong harbour!"

And he was right.

When I purchased my way out of the Brits (700 pound sterling circa 1984) and moved to Canada I joined the CF.  Attitudes around me were why would I join up a second time and why the CF.  There seemed to be no tradition or respect for the CF.  I seriously considered jacking it in and returning back to UK.

By the way, I'm, glad I stayed.


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## Pvt. Pukepail (12 Oct 2006)

My entire family has been completely supportive- not surprising since I come from a military household (father in the army, grandfather in the airforce, aunt who attended RMC).  Mommykins however while supportive, has voiced some trepidation (what with the current situation in Afghanistan, and the fact that this is the first time since practically Korea that our troops have been coming home in body bags on a regular basis, so it's not surprising).

Most of my friends and college instructors who I keep in contact with have been very supportive as well.  Some of them don't really understand my reasons for joining, but do appreciate the fact that I'm willing to put my ass on the line to defend the country that my ancestors helped build.  A few of my reservist buddies are jacked up about it, most of them giving me the same "About god-damned time you did something with your life," speech when I tell them.

A few of my friends have been less supportive, but I tend to classify them in the 'ignorant civ' category.  "Why would you want to be a peacekeeper?"  "Don't you know Canada doesn't even have a real military?" "The army?  Did you get drafted or something?" "Aww, you want to be a fascist puppet!?"  The criticism from those types I tend to ignore wholly.  The opinions of my friends have never held a lot of weight with me anyway.

All in all, everyone whom I've told I'm enlisting have been pretty supportive which is good, all of my family is backing me and all of the friends who I do care about are supportive, so it's all good.  I just don't want to let them down now.


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## medaid (12 Oct 2006)

Oh boy...this definitely brings back memories.

First off I had the aspiration to join the military in general since I was a toddler. Both my great grandfather and grandfather had been generals, 2 uncles on my mother's side were officers, and my own father was a light colonel in the TW Marines. 

My father passed away in the line of service when I was one, so lets just say my mother was not excited at all when I said I was signing on the dotted line. She cried, argued and generally had a hard time accepting that fact, until I told her that the CF operates predominately at that time, in Peacekeeping operations ( I know I know my bad...I lied) and there was no worries that I would be sent overseas unless I wanted to (which I whole heartedly did). She eventually came around, but reluctantly let me go and joined the ranks.

Now... my friends... none of which I was friends with during high school are my friends anymore. The area I come from... sadly to say I describe them as truly ignorant of anything that had to do with the Forces in general. When I went to high school, I was in Cadets (I was one of the good ones   thank you VERY much   ). Every Remembrance Day we would have a ceremony at the gym in my school. We would get the usual sneers and jeers from the ignorant teenagers, and not surprisingly my friends. When I told some of them I was joining, I got the ' So you want to go off and kill people now?'  or  ' wow...you've gotta be the dumbest person I've ever met! ' or words to that effect with more vulgarisms and swearing. Of course we all cannot forget the obvious!!! 'You cant get a real job, or get into a real school. THAT is why you're joining the ARMY!' Yup...they ALL thought the only place to go in the military was the ARMY. 
It was really sad during the last 2 years of high school when I was going through the stages, calling the recruiting office on my breaks lol.  It always puzzled me why my community was soo ignorant. My high school alone had more then a hand full who had served in the military and perished (this was a long span of time, not talking about just the recent something odd years). One of the alumnus that I remembered the most, was a Captain in the airforce, who bought his piece of the farm when he was on a training ex overseas in his CF-18. 

In college and university. Anonymity seemed to be the key. It appears most places, especially at community colleges (or at least the one I went to) there are many politically active students who doesn't seem to have anything better to do, EXCEPT bash the military, the war...and shouting out random slogans such as 'CANADA OUT OF IRAQ!' or 'CANADA IS IN AFGHANISTAN FOR THE OIL'   I shake my head and walk away. Over all negative negative response. My school mates always ask me the stupidest of questions i.e. 'so are you a sniper?' ' are you a Navy Seal?' 'are you going to go to Iraq and kill some women and children?' (Yes...these were actual questions, and I guess most of us have heard them). It seemed funny to me all that time because a) I was in the Army not the Navy b) I was a Med Tech and had nothing to do with killing! *UGH* no matter how much I tried to explain...it was just pointless towards the end.

Finally...my relationships have been a little wonky too. Some girls hook up because they like the uniform. Some girls stop hooking up after they find out that I wear a uniform. its all really funny in the end. The girl I'm with now (the love of my life) have been extremely supportive all these years. Except when I told her I was signed up for a Roto to the box (which isn't happening anymore...  my old Ops O took me off because I didn't speak a lick of French, and it was a predominately Franco Roto. Yes... out here on the West Coast, not many of us do!), she balled her eyes out for hours, and begged me to release! She still does it almost everytime she hears that we've lost one of us over there... I guess I can't blame her... 

Anyways....negative negative negative...and yes ppl DEFINETLY change their attitudes when they found out that I had joined up.


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## spartan031 (12 Oct 2006)

Why are you joining the CF?

Because I need a greencard to get into the marines.

Why don't you get a greencard?

No money and it takes years plus right now I'm bored.

Oh.


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## tlg (15 Oct 2006)

spartan031 said:
			
		

> Why are you joining the CF?
> 
> Because I need a greencard to get into the marines.
> 
> ...



That's a brill reason to sign up. If only I was that smrt.  ;D


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## gnome123 (15 Oct 2006)

In my life i decided i wanted to be a firefighter in grade 10, Due to me wanting to help people and make a difference. Its is nearly impossible ive discovered now a graduate and out of school for a couple months to get into the university. They look for people 20-24 with life experience... After working the worst of the worst jobs ie. cleaning dishes, bundling paper, cutting grass for minimum wage 50hrs a week i started to look into something i can do that can make a difference as well be a challenge.

Obviously i found the army. I choose infantry just handed in my application and want to be around people with common interests and goals.

Mom- Doesn't want me to go... due to afghanistan and pisses me off when they think the death of those soldiers are in vien.

Dad- Doesn't want me to go.... if anything wants me to be a M.P because he is a cop himself but for some reason hate that proffession.

Friends- Think im just going to come home in a body bag. Almost every single one has stated that to me.

***although i really don't care what they have to say... it would be nice for a little bit of support.

I am counting the days untill i get a call the army is my only sollution if not accepted which i don't know why because im gonna give it my all i will be stuck in a town where ill be a on a self-destructive path being hard enough seeing all my friends get into the hard drugs and myself staying away and isolating myself staying in shape. (at least i got drums & guitar & video games hahha) im such a dork  

CANT WAIT!!! adios amegos


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## rocker23 (15 Oct 2006)

I'm in the same boat gnome...  My parents feel the same way. My friends think i'm crazy...  But however I do have the support of my brothers which is nice.  They support me 100%.


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## career_radio-checker (15 Oct 2006)

When I told my folks I was joining back in 2003 I was met with a little bit of shock but they supported me nonetheless. To be honest I didn't know anything about the military and couldn't answer any of their questions until I had completed Basic training. I live in Ottawa but all  of my friends and family are in BC so anytime I go visit them I tell them about my experiences. They listen attentively but they never really say openly that they support my role in the army -- except my best friends. I find it's a strange subject around my house, no one will engage me or ask me about the army when I visit, it's always I who has to engage the topic. I gage it's an uncomfortable topic for them so I just don't really talk about it that much. Their unease seems exacerbated by the mounting death toll in Afghanistan 

The day I tell them I am going to Afghanistan ( not yet but hopefully within 2 years) should be an interesting dinner conversation.


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## Jacqueline (15 Oct 2006)

Maybe some people think it's wrong? The pendulum of the mind oscillates between sense and nonsense, not between right and wrong.


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## tlg (15 Oct 2006)

One of my friends keeps on saying to me "Soon you'll be out of here and shooting ter or ists (that's how he pronunces it) and out of this place."

I still don't know how to reply to this.


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## GUNS (15 Oct 2006)

No one can make you feel inferior without your consent. Never give in.

Being a soldier is a career choice, no different from being an electrician or a mechanic. The only difference is anyone can be a electrician or a mechanic but only certain people can be a soldier. All the other trades need unions to keep them together, soldiers have family.

I am so privilege to have worn the uniform of this country and proud to have worn it in other countries. When a soldier is walking down a street in his civvy's, there is no mistaking that this person is military. To my way of thinking, people can think what they like about soldiers, for I know that when I wake in the morning I will still be a soldier and they will be(thinking),they will be(still thinking),they will be someone in need of attitude adjustment. 

Do what you want to do, not what others think you should not do.


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## patrick666 (15 Oct 2006)

> One of my friends keeps on saying to me "Soon you'll be out of here and shooting ter or ists (that's how he pronunces it) and out of this place."



I hear that often as well. They say it like I've no idea what joining the military means and somehow always revolves around only "killing people and being brainwashed". It's truly a sad state. They also have that right and as a soldier it is your duty to defend that.


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## dont.get.it.48 (16 Oct 2006)

yea.. my dad is all in the 'the army brain washes you' thing. he thinks that the military brainwashes u into having no personality and ones your done training that you will do what ever you are told no matter what. 

my best friend, when he first heard about it, he wasn't for it, but he wasn't against it because that's what i wanted to do. 
last month some girl we were hanging out with in a group of our friends found out that i was joining the army reserve and she started on all the stereo type things, and my best Friend took the time to listen to what i had to say about the military and he told that girl off. 

I've heard and read things about peoples best friends or friends or what not bashing them for wanting to be in the military. but sometimes they actually turn around and eventually understand ones u explain it to them. but if u explain it to them in detail, and there still on about the stereo types, it's not worth trying to explain to them. they just wont get it. 

so to sum it up, like others said in this thread
do what you want to do with your life, not what others think you should do... like it's your life, not theirs

i still have people hitting me and yelling at me for wanting to join. but i think it's all worth it so i continue with my enrolment proses.

there's a surprising amount of people that doesn't think the military and being a soldier is a real job. but like some one said in another post. it's just like being an electrician or something. but anyone can be those things but few people can be soldiers. the only difference from being in the military and any other job is that there is no other job like being in the military.
if you get deployed somewhere's, you will get to see, and do what others back at home will never get to experience, good or bad.

i support the troops fighting for us 100% in what they do. because what they do is increadable. and they do it day to day, without nearly enough pay. most people couldn't put up half a day with what they put up with day to day. 
anyone reading this in Afghanistan or that's been there, awesome job!


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## GAP (16 Oct 2006)

Interesting read, if it was not so hard to read. One of the things the forces are going to require of you is to be able to articulate an idea on paper, WITH proper punctuation and sentence structure. You did OK, but if you look back to your post, you will notice it is hard to read. There's half of your argument gone already.


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## dont.get.it.48 (21 Oct 2006)

i know, i was at school and the period was almost over. so i was typing and getting the post done as fast as i could. I usually check it over before i put it up, but i didn't have time this time. sorry about that.


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## elixa (29 Oct 2006)

Well I have just recently started the application process for both the ROTP and continued education officer programs and other then my boyfriend (who has been in the army for 13 years now) who is very supportive, most people have been unsupportive.  Their issue for me is that i'm a single mother and they're concerned about me leaving my little guy while in training.  I do see their perspective of it but currently i'm working full time overnight shift work at a job I hate, going to university full time not to mention caring for my son.  When I'm home I'm usually so tired and grumpy that i'm not being a great mother to him anyhow, as things stand.  I've been doing this for several years and its a very wearing routine.  I'm no sure if people understand how miserable I am doing what I am right now or what but they can't understand why i'd want to join the forces when I'm so close to finishing my degree.  How I see it, going away for training is a small price to pay for a job I feel is worthwhile and a semi regular routine which in turn will benefit my son.  Needless to say it's discouraging when most people that you care for are crossing their fingers that you won't get accepted.  I'm just grateful I have a guy that is encouraging and stands behind my decision.


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## patrick666 (29 Oct 2006)

> Needless to say it's discouraging when most people that you care for are crossing their fingers that you won't get accepted.



Use their hope for fuel and refuse to give in to their discouragement. When you are accepted, it will be all the more sweeter to say "I did it" because not many people have the guts to do so. Best of luck.


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## militarygirl (1 Nov 2006)

I was very lucky.  When I decided to join the Reg F, my family and most of my friends were very supportive ;D.  That was back in the late 80's.  Now I have a brother-in-law who joined just a few years ago, and the family was not nearly as supportive.  He joined as reservist and enjoyed it so much he was(is?) entertaining ideas on either transferring to the Reg Force or going on tour as a reservist, though these are not mutually exclusive.  Needless to say, with the operational commitments today this was not received well.  It wasn't his wife, my step-sister, that is outspoken about not "allowing" him to go, it is his mother-in-law.  She is very opinionated on this and has even stated "...that her daughter shouldn't and won't wait for him to return since he would be volunteering to put his life at risk and now that he is married he should be staying here with her".  This is such a hot topic that we go out of our way to avoid the subject if at all possible.... Though I think he gets a charge out of making comments, out of context, just to get the mother-in-law riled.


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## Alex (4 Nov 2006)

Man, I am really glad that I found this topic.  The other day I requested documents from the recruiting website, just out of curiosity.  I'm interested in the reserves so I figured it couldn't hurt.

Today I get the big yellow envelope from CF recruiting in North Bay.  My mom informs me that I have some "reading material" in the mailbox.  I know what she's talking about obviously.  She says it is my choice if I want to join but she kind of has that "look" and that "tone" that mothers some time get.  I can tell she is a little frustrated.  But my sister is a different case; she's going nuts, thinking I'm going to be sent to Afghanistan, regardless of the fact that I'm interested in the reserves and would have that choice.

It's disturbing, but it encourages me.  I'm going to put on my sweats and go for a run.  Get in better shape before I apply.


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## exsemjingo (4 Nov 2006)

Sooner or later you have to cut the apron strings, Alex.  You are approaching that point.


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## Alex (4 Nov 2006)

exsemjingo said:
			
		

> Sooner or later you have to cut the apron strings, Alex.  You are approaching that point.



Thanks for the words of encouragement, exsemjingo.  I look forward to joining the Forces.


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## Bobby Rico (6 Nov 2006)

For me, my attitude toward other people changed when I enlisted.  Though I'm still untrained, just sworn-in, I still feel a pride that I've never experienced before.  And maybe this is the wrong attitude to have, but when I look at other people, I sort of feel like 'Well, what the hell are you doing for your country?"  I know I probably shouldn't look down on people (not that I'm disrespectful of anyone) but you do sort of feel elite when you're in the army, and everyone else is just a civilian.  I dunno about the rest of you, but I had the hugest confidence problem prior to finding the army, but now that I'm in having fully committed myself, I feel like nothing that anyone can say or do to me will bring me down.  It's great!


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## Zell_Dietrich (6 Nov 2006)

Bobby Rico said:
			
		

> For me, my attitude toward other people changed when I enlisted.  Though I'm still untrained, just sworn-in, I still feel a pride that I've never experienced before.  And maybe this is the wrong attitude to have, but when I look at other people, I sort of feel like 'Well, what the hell are you doing for your country?"  I know I probably shouldn't look down on people (not that I'm disrespectful of anyone) but you do sort of feel elite when you're in the army, and everyone else is just a civilian.  I dunno about the rest of you, but I had the hugest confidence problem prior to finding the army, but now that I'm in having fully committed myself, I feel like nothing that anyone can say or do to me will bring me down.  It's great!



I think it is completely normal.  I know you don't view others with contempt,  but you probably are projecting your previous feelings of being without purpose on them.  Not everyone serves our community best by wearing a uniform.  Some serve us best by being teachers others by writing books some by being a parking lot attendant.  Remember,  when you serve,  you are serving them. I serve so that they need never know fear from a foreign army.  That and I look good in uniform. :blotto:

I must confess a similar feeling I get ever year from Nov 1-Nov 11.  I look at everyone without a poppy on as uncaring. (which is unfortunate because I have to keep three or four poppies in my pocket because mine keep falling off)


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## dont.get.it.48 (8 Nov 2006)

Zell_Dietrich said:
			
		

> I have to keep three or four poppies in my pocket because mine keep falling off)



stick an eraser piece on the pin when u put it on, 
it acts kinda like a nut keeping a bolt on


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## Samsquanch (9 Nov 2006)

I was shocked to see poeple not sporting a poppy on Nov. 8th at the recruiting center writting the cfat. Someone should have told them to go home!!! They had some at the front desk thank god. Back to the main topic my bro. is a neo-hippy political science student at a university and he supports my decision to join. Pretty wierd if you ask me? My mom hates it and my Dad is very supportive... Girlfriend says I can join if I'm not the radio man (always gets shot in the movies). ;D


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## career_radio-checker (9 Nov 2006)

Samsquanch said:
			
		

> Girlfriend says I can join if I'm not the radio man (always gets shot in the movies). ;D



Yah but what the movies don't show is the radio-man in the back of a heated truck, watching DVDs and drinking his Timmies.  ;D


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## baudspeed (10 Nov 2006)

Well its been a while since i have started the thread, so i decided to check up on it. Wow its getting long.
Just an update. It has been a few months since i have stated to my family and friends that this is what i am doing. I dont regret telling them, but I do regret discussing my decision with people at work. It caused no end of issues for me right up until the last day. Even my boss used it as a point to joke and tease on, and was very consistant i might add. I thought i would pass on my perspective for those who may find themselves working in a place that has lots of people and a successful rumor mill. I received no negativity, but lots of awquard moments from career office people who asked and when i replied with 'yes', then did the whole surprised 'wow....<insert uncomfortable silence here>' moment. 

So for those of you who are proud to step up to the plate in the same way that I am intending to do, keep in mind that dispite the fact that there is honor in the proffession, tread lightly in the current workplace, since you will have to deal with the questions right up until the last day and for most people it will be the day before quitting to go to BMQ.

As for friends and family, most of my family still asks me if am still intending on applying, and they get the same answer as I gave them months ago. I'm committed. As soon as my PT is up to stuff, im getting signed up.


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## spqr (11 Nov 2006)

My supervisor just blurted out "wow I hope you don't get your head blown off" at first. We are good friends and have spent weeks at a time in the backcountry together.  It was a funny moment and then he watched the infantry officer video on the website with me and said it again a bit more seriously.  I didn't realise how worried and serious he was until I saw the letter he wrote to explain my departure to the 200 staff we supervised.  It said that I "will put a face to those brave people on the news that have to suffer from time to time for the sake of our values."  (I damn near cried)

Tommorow is my big going away party at work (Nov 11, nobody has mentioned the connection), and like most large organizations a call went out for people to attend if they want.  I received a ton of rsvp's right away and people are so thrilled to see me make the move.  I work in a place that some would say was full of super liberals and tree huggers (I would bet the Green party would win an elelction if these few hundred people were the only voters) and I have yet to hear one bad thing about my decision - even through the rumor mill.  For a bunch of lefties there certainly is a lot of support for the military and the Afganistan mission and for me.

Anyway, thats my story.


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## Alex (13 Nov 2006)

spqr said:
			
		

> My supervisor just blurted out "wow I hope you don't get your head blown off" at first. We are good friends and have spent weeks at a time in the backcountry together.  It was a funny moment and then he watched the infantry officer video on the website with me and said it again a bit more seriously.  I didn't realise how worried and serious he was until I saw the letter he wrote to explain my departure to the 200 staff we supervised.  It said that I "will put a face to those brave people on the news that have to suffer from time to time for the sake of our values."  (I damn near cried)
> 
> Tommorow is my big going away party at work (Nov 11, nobody has mentioned the connection), and like most large organizations a call went out for people to attend if they want.  I received a ton of rsvp's right away and people are so thrilled to see me make the move.  I work in a place that some would say was full of super liberals and tree huggers (I would bet the Green party would win an elelction if these few hundred people were the only voters) and I have yet to hear one bad thing about my decision - even through the rumor mill.  For a bunch of lefties there certainly is a lot of support for the military and the Afganistan mission and for me.
> 
> Anyway, thats my story.



Wow spqr, that sounds like you got a fantastic reaction from your workplace.  I think what your boss wrote was amazing.  Good for him to have that kind of attitude.  When I mentioned my desire to join the reserves to my boss, she was quite supportive as well (her brother is serving in PPCLI).

To add to my previous post about peoples' reactions-  my family seems to have gotten over it, although my friends are proving to be a new obstacle altogether.  One of my friends acted as if I was going to be a murderer.  When I explained about serving my country, she acted as if I was quoting a cheesy Hollywood movie.  When I mentioned my family's military history and tradition, she referred to it as "a tradition of killing people."  I thought this was a hurtful way of looking at WWI and WWII combatants, but to each his own.  I can't wait to serve.


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## Prospect (13 Nov 2006)

I'm finally submitting my application tomorrow to the recruiting centre, and I'm getting mixed reactions.   Joining the Canadian Forces is something that I have always wanted to do, and most people in my life considerate it a worth while opportunity.  My family is supportive, but naturally, is worried about me.  My friends are supportive, and most wished that they had the nerve to join, or weren't in serious relationships that tie them down.  My employer supports the decision and is the author of one of my reference letters for the application.  

    My girl... the girl of my dreams, have an amazing relationship with, love more than anything..friend, however, does NOT support the decision....at all.  She refuses to have anything to do with me while I'm a member of the Canadian Forces.  She has worked with many army wives, and children as a life guard and refuses to put herself through the stresses of having a significant other in the military.  During the six hour conversation we had about it tonight, I pleaded with her to give it a shot.  But, regretfully, she is firm in her stance, and has a made what should have been an easy decision, much much much harder.


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## Kat Stevens (13 Nov 2006)

_* "My girl... the girl of my dreams, have an amazing relationship with, love more than anything..friend, however, does NOT support the decision....at all.  She refuses to have anything to do with me while I'm a member of the Canadian Forces.  She has worked with many army wives, and children as a life guard and refuses to put herself through the stresses of having a significant other in the military.  During the six hour conversation we had about it tonight, I pleaded with her to give it a shot.  But, regretfully, she is firm in her stance, and has a made what should have been an easy decision, much much much harder."*_

I'd say the opposite: Made a tough decision that much easier, but that's just me.


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## Samsquanch (13 Nov 2006)

Good story so far Prospect... I want to hear the rest!!! Let me know how it goes. My girlfriend doesn't want me to apply, but I did anyways! It took some finesse and a few long boring repeating talks to convince her. Now, I'm really just hoping I get in...... or did I have to sit though all that bull for nothing. If I remember any of the fountain of garbage I spewed at her I'll give you a pointer or two. Until then GIV'ER
good luck


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## George Wallace (13 Nov 2006)

Prospect said:
			
		

> My girl... the girl of my dreams,........ , however, does NOT support the decision....at all.  .



I might point out to you that you have contradicted yourself.  If she really was the girl of your dreams, she would be supportive of you.  You have a tough decision to make.  Then there are all those old sayings about "there is always another bus", or "if you set it free", etc.  

You have one life to live, and it is much better if you are not living someone else's.


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## Bobby Rico (13 Nov 2006)

That's really tough about your girl, Prospect.  Personally, that was one of the reasons that led me to the Canadian Forces as a potential career, is because I have nothing to lose but everything to gain.  I don't have a girlfriend, nor anything that really anchors me down to a particular place- so for me it was easy.  However, I can imagine how tough it must be to be passionate enough about serving to want to join, but also have to contend with the person whom you love who is less than supportive.  It's definitely not an easy decision, and I think anybody whose truely been in love with someone should understand this.  But its your life guy, sometimes you have to cut your losses and just do it for yourself.


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## baudspeed (13 Nov 2006)

Prospect (and others)
I dont know how long you have been in your current relationship, and i dont know how long you have let the news 'sink in for her', and i wont try to suggest one way or the other, but rather give my own personal situation in replacement for advice:
I was in a long term relationship where my siginificant other was super supportive in every aspect of my existence. So supportive in fact that there was no opinion on anything. It got to the point where when i stated that I was joining the military, it was a bit of a shock and it scared her. But immediately again she was supportive, and said that she would follow me anywhere. This was a good thing. And i beleive that her intentions were honest. But my concern was two fold 1)was she being supportive because she had not thought of the implications of how many nights by herself there were going to be and 2)was her lack of opinion an example of how our relationship was operating. I had wanted a 'team' not a dictatorship. Unfortunately as time went on our relationship failed after 3 years for various reasons. But i am glad that I did not drag her through the beginning of the recruiting process and then through a deployment or two. Perhapse if she had expressed a stronger opinion and became educated on world politics and thrown herself into learning all that there was to learn about her new responsibility (yes, responsibility, because if you make a decision in a relationship, and the other choses to follow, they need to inform *THEMSELVES*, otherwise they will always be ignorant of what is to come).
So maybe the thing that you take away from this experience I am sharing is either 1) relationships complicate things, or maybe 2) that you need to find someone, who, when faced with a  life altering challenge, that they learn about it, read books, newspapers, documentarys, this website and any source that you pass to them. I am not an army brat, and I am not married to the military, but I suspect that the spouces of most of the soldiers posting take an active role in their siginifcant others lives.

Whoops... looks like that was advice afterall.


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## Prospect (17 Nov 2006)

Thank you to everyone who replied to my story.  I guess I worded her state of mind incorrectly in my original post, and so I will try again.  My girl DOES support my dream to be a part of the Canadian Forces.  She, however, DOES NOT want her boyfriend/significant other to be a member of the Canadian Forces, and refuses to keep herself in this kind of relationship.  The last time we spoke about the issue, she was the one telling me to go, and I was the one saying I should stay and find something else to pursue.  She is willing to be there for me when I need her, but she doesn't want to cry herself to sleep every night, or all during her university classes like she did on monday, for that matter.  She is a great girl, I know this now more than ever, so my decision is now harder than it was before.  I went and saw the recruiter on tuesday, and am getting the required documents now that I am home for the weekend.  I am going through with the application because I believe that this is my calling, and that it is the right thing for me to do at this point in my life.  I am wondering though, if anyone has been in the same situation and gone through with it, and had regrets about leaving.  I know becoming a soldier is probably hard enough to do by itself, without this kind dilemma weighing on you.  I have let her know about this site, and gave her about 13 pages of posts from the Homefront Forum for her to flip through so she can see that many people are very happy living the military lifestyle.  Thanks again to everyone who replied, and I would really like to hear from more people in this kind of situation.


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## patrick666 (17 Nov 2006)

Soldier and sacrifice are synonymous.


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## exsemjingo (17 Nov 2006)

Hi prospect, welcome to growing older.
Your girlfriend has told you what she thinks of your joining, and that's not going to change any time soon.  Her reasons may be spurious and faulty (from what I have read they seem to be that way), but that is irrelevant as far as changing the way she feels.
You have to choose between joining the military and counting on staying with her.  Maybe she will come around, but if you join you must be prepared for her to leave.
I don't know what your plans are, so I can't make a recommendation either way; all I can do is tell you what I see.  Spend some time considering what you want long term, and then go for it.


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## Hunter (18 Nov 2006)

Prospect - It's a tough decision to make, no doubt.  But for my highly overvalued 2 cents, follow your dream.  No doubt it's going to hurt if she follows through on what she has told you.  Then again maybe she will change her mind.  As one of the older Corporals in the CF, I have had the opportunity to observe much younger soldiers with a bit of detachment that the generation gap can provide.  One thing I have noticed in many (not most, not all, but more than a few) young people who undergo a metamorphosis over the course of a few years.  Dare I say it, but I think to a large extent joining the military makes young people more respectful, organized, motvated, polite...generally better people.  

edit:  An interesting anecdote that just occurred to me:  Last Monday we had municipal elections in Ontario.  Of my co-workers at my civvie job (older tax-paying family types), maybe half voted.  I have yet to talk to a reservist who was an eligible voter who did not vote.  So I guess I should add politically aware to the above-mentioned list - go figure.

Maybe this transformation will happen to you, and maybe she will like the 'new and improved' you - not that there's anything wrong with the current version!  Maybe you will be able to give her a better understanding of what it means to wear the green, and maybe she will become a supporter, if not of the entire military then at least of you.  

Maybe she will decide she really likes how you look in your DEUs and that will end up being enough for her.  But if you decide not to join in order to keep her happy, you will never know.  That's a  recipe for relationship-ending resentment to me.  Perhaps not right away, but very likely a few years down the road.

The bottom line is that I think there are few people who didn't get their heart broken at least once, but for those it happens to, life goes on.  And many people look back on one really significant relationship from their youth with a sense of regret for what might have been,  but there will be other relationships.  I think it would be a lot tougher to look back at 40 and wonder what it would have been like to join the army.

One more thing - chicks dig guys in uniform.  They really do.     ^-^

Good luck lad.

Hunter


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## elixa (19 Nov 2006)

My boyfriend was previously engaged to a girl that wasn't supportive of his decision to be in the forces, so they spent years in an on again, off again relationship (he did almost quit for her once)  considering he's with me now it's off again for good.     I'm in the process of joining...  well let me rephrase hopefully joining, and he's very supportive.  Its a hard thing being with someone in the forces and you have to be independent enough to live without your spouse by your side at times.  He's currently in Borden for training until March   but I knew what I was getting into and the forces have been his life for 13 years so it makes him happy.  I couldn't imagine him as anything other then a soldier, it makes him the great person he is today.

So the point I'm making is that you shouldn't give up what you want in life for the person you're with.  If they can't accept what makes you happy then you'll eventually find someone that will share your dreams.


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## medaid (8 Dec 2006)

"So the point I'm making is that you shouldn't give up what you want in life for the person you're with.  If they can't accept what makes you happy then you'll eventually find someone that will share your dreams."

+ 1


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## theguns (8 Dec 2006)

When I joined, i was hit with mixed reactions.  But As time progressed and everyone saw that I was serious about my life and that I would do anything to protect this country, opinions changed.  i went from being a foolish teenager, to a man that my family and friends now respect as what I am a Canadian Soldier.  And they are now damn proud of what I am and what I want to accomplish, so just give it time if the people really care about you they will show you that they are proud of the what is the best decision you an make.  Welcome to the family.




"To a gunner there are two types of people, other gunners and targets."


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## freeze_time311 (16 Jul 2007)

I know it's old, but I feel this topic is important. Everyone is going to receive some feedback in regards to joining the CF. It would be difficult not to. The CF is known for its unique job descriptions. It is even stated on there web site, "not looking for the usual 9-5, try the unique profession of arms." So a little feedback can almost be expected from everyone you know, for this is defiantly not a typical career choice.

 I live in small town with alot of WWII veterans, so when I bring up the topic of me joining the CF, the typical response is, good for you, you can do it, you'd make your grandfather proud. But if one were to approach a friend that they may have gone to school with for the past 12 years and say, "I joined the CF today," you could expect that person to be a little thrown of guard. The profession is supposed to be unique, it's supposed to be out of the ordinary. It's also so challenging, that alot of people, don't ever concider a career in the forces. So it's not unusual to hear different opinions from all sources. A mother will have different concerns than a father. As will a sister,brother, friend, girlfriend, boyfriend, or even a spouse. 

What I'm saying is, expect different views and opinions from everyone you know. Most people would be supportive, but there is also a large population of people that have political views, which may obstruct there support of your decision. They may not necessarly disagree with you, but with the CF as a whole. Regardless of what anyone says, do what you want, and let nothing hold you back. Take everyones advise into consideration, respect there opinion, and move on. 

I am presently in an argument with my girlfriend over this same matter. I have applied for the Infantry, and we're having a hard time making it work together. Her opinion about the CF is important to me, but because it is different than mine, she has a hard time supporting me. Which I can understand, she hates the thought of war, and doesn't want to live that kind of life style. But I do, I want that life style. So were making it work until I go. This is upsetting, but its what has to happen in order for me to succeed. Surround yourself with supportive people, and let nothing hold you back.



                                                                                                 Jimmy


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## baudspeed (16 Jul 2007)

Well a response and an update.
I started this post last year and didnt expect so many responses. Freeze, i can certainly see what you mean. Completely right. In hind sight i should have been expecting the stunned looks when i told it to family and friends. But now they mostly have accepted that i am looking at it as a serious choice/option and not backing down.

I have lost alot of weight getting in shape for this career change and it has physically shown them that i am doing more than just talking. I have made attempts to explain why i am doing this. Most of it falls on deaf ears at times, since many of them tend to be people who simply repeat the whole 'get our troops out of afganistan' mantra without thinking about why we were asked to be there.

Either way, i digress; Over time i have seen the people around me getting use to the idea that it is going to happen sooner or later. Things have settled down, even some of my more 'tree loving' friends still talk to me.

So after the initial shock, it gets better. It just takes time. People realize that it was not a decison made lightly after a night drinking at the bar or watching a movie, but an informed decison based on personal values and modivations.

Thanks to all who have been posting/posted btw.


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## blacktriangle (16 Jul 2007)

As a person going reg force within the year...

I have a girlfriend, have for quite some time. I know I will be ending it in the next few months so I may move on, I could never ask her to leave her life behind and come with me. My family think I'm abandoning them essentially. My friends are either civilians or reservists with no intentions of going to the regs, won't see alot of them for a while if ever.

But? I'm doing what I want to do with my life, and thats enough.


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## Kertys (17 Jul 2007)

Hey Guys,

The thing I ave learn with my experiance with the force so far is that support is very important.
The fact that you want to join and leave everthing behind is sometime appealing (leave your trouble behind and start fresh) but you will need support

I know I start to my journey last november 2006 .. i am still in the medical part as u all know.. 

My wife was a great supporter and and close famally also... Losing the weight and get in shape was a big deal for me and they help me out thought it...
I know during BMQ I will need those memory of encouragment and support that they have provide me to go trougth it....  

My advice to anyone who want to join is to surround yourself with people that support you.. if your famally dont ... find a friend or support group or talk to people like here at army.ca   people who are going to the same thing...

That my 2 cent for the day !!!

later guys..


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## tree hugger (17 Jul 2007)

Lost Cargo said:
			
		

> ....even some of my more 'tree loving' friends still talk to me.



Ouch!

-TH


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## Kat Stevens (17 Jul 2007)

I'm going to come off sounding insensitive here, but Jeebus Cripes!!  No doubt BMQ and WhateverthehellelseQ everyone is going for, will be tough, probably the toughest thing you've ever done. But, and here's the important part, YOU WILL GO THROUGH MUCH TOUGHER THINGS LATER ON.  It's a couple of months out of your life, and doesn't really require cheerleaders, therapists, or any other emotional support team back home giving you an ego stroke every time the big bad Sergeant yells at you, or you didn't get that last lime jell-o at lunchtime (I know, the army NEVER runs out of lime jell-o).  Put your head down at git 'er done.  It's not easy, but it's not the life shattering, soul destroying ordeal everyone here seems to think it is.  As for peoples attitudes, are you joining for them, or for you?  grab yourself a pair, you'll need them later....


Rant off


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## blacktriangle (18 Jul 2007)

Night, if you're 16... you're applying to the Nav res right?


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## Sixshooter (19 Jul 2007)

I love having support. 

My mom is great for it, so far she's been with me 100% of the way through this re-process, and was more pissed at my VR'ing originally than i was lol, but than again, she was married to a marine and her father was a WW2 vet, so she knew what i was going through. She's so supportive of it that she's even joined every Canadian Army support group on Facebook lol.

My brother? He understands whats going on in this world, but he's the computer type geek that loves his job helping other geeks, but he's still supportive too as is my gf. Havent met anybody thus far in this period of my life that hasnt liked my decisions, including all my friends who think its crazy good that im gonna be a soldier.  ;D


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## ksullivan_139 (23 Jul 2007)

I guess I've had it pretty lucky with regards to peoples opinions of me joining the forces (navy to be exact).  My immediate family has been the greatest especially my mom and my middle sister who is a navy wife so understands the life well.  My biggest supporter has actually been my ex-fiancee at least while we were together, she was the one that pushed me to finally put my paperwork in after years of procrastinating.  she was there after all my interviews, testing and medical to congratulate me.  unfortunately her and I broke up 3 days before I got my offer of employment and even though we broke up she was the first I told.  Unfortunately she had gotten in with certain a group of friends that put doubt into her head about what I was doing and came she came to the conclusion that she couldn't marry a person who's only job was to "kill people".  Oh well no matter how grateful I am for her support during my enrollment process, all I can say is good riddance and I've found a girl that is completely understanding and supportive of the life that I am about to make for myself and my future family.  As for friends and relatives support I have had nothing but positive comments as they know that it is something that I have wanted for a long time (17 years by my reckoning).  there is the odd comment made out of arrogance but they are very open to everything I have to say about my choice to join the navy.  Even people I meet at work and they ask about my belt buckle(I have a tri-service buckle) are very positive and I have heard very few negative come from anyone.  I think I heard more negative comments when I was a cadet,  I got called every name under sun and then some that I had never heard before.  And so ends my rant.


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## Jacqueline (25 Jul 2007)

A piece of advice that has come across a few times would be : " Don't work too hard, you'll look like a man". That really pees me off because it is completely stereotypical.


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## Testify (26 Jul 2007)

Best feeling in the world was when a week after I told my parents my decision, I came home and my dad already had 2 'Support the Troops' magnets on his Jeep, 1 on the SUV and a pin on his Police uniform.  Made me feel great to know they are supporting me, even though you can see my moms eyes fill up whenever I talk about it.

All my friends are supportive and they all support the troops and the mission in Afghanistan with exception of one not supporting the mission; but he still supports the troops for what they do.

Hardest person to get through to was my Grandma, she was always negative but just last week she came for a visit and was a lot better about it, asking questions and seemed more interested and understanding.

Other than a few "you're crazy!" or "why would you want to do that?!" from college friends or family which I can always slam back good rebuttals too, it's all gravy. 

It may take some time but eventually they will realize it's your dream and will support you.  If not then it will be the biggest mistake of their lives.


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## Col.Steiner (4 Aug 2007)

I have applied to reenlist as well! My application is an ongoing process that has become bogged down in the excessive waiting period! In the time that I have submitted my application up to now, the forces have suffered most of the 66 fatalities, which has turned all of my references completely around and are now completely and utterly against my joining. What does one do in this situation? I want to join and have not changed my mind since, and I have done everything asked of me, but now have come up against this! :brickwall:


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## misfit (6 Aug 2007)

People were proud of me for wanting to join the army. However, some people tried to talk me out of it. Of course people are going to give you weird reactions. Joining the army is a weird thing to do. The pay is crap, its boring, its hard to make plans or have any kind of life, and you get jerked around for everything. Why would anyone want a life like that?


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## FullMetalParka (9 Aug 2007)

When I told my parents I wanted to join as either a pilot or a radop (way back when). They went absolutely nutters. I mean ballistic! They told me that I would be throwing my life away, and that I would be shot down over some godforsaken country or be left to die in the middle east (Gulf War I had ended a few years ago and they thought it would start right back up). I told them to get bent (I was 14 at the time, and majorly pissed that they did not support me after they said that they would support any career I chose). Things simmered down after a while and they thought that I would never follow through with it. When I graduated, I told them that I would be joining right after I got a degree (which I planned to do at the RMC). They offered to pay my tuition for UBC in full, on the promise that I did something "productive, not destructive" with my life. Their idea of productive was sitting at a desk 24/7 being a slave to my cellphone, fiddling around with stock options, or sitting in a cubicle for 33% of my adult life tinkering with lines of code on a computer. I graduate in '09, and I plan on joining either as an LCIS tech, a Sig Op, or a Pilot (I still haven't decided  :-\). The only person that has been supportive is one of my friends and my grandmother. I fully intend on keeping my family's military history intact (1 RCAF, 1 RCN, 1 army during WWII), even though it has been largely forgotten by a majority of its members. My mom still say I'm going to get killed and be forced to be one of Bush's kill-bots (flower child in the '60s  :) and my dad still says he'll write me out of the will (which isn't an empty threat). Doesn't matter to me. There is no higher honor than serving your country proudly. That in itself is worth all the tense family reunions I see in my future .

Suck on that, flower children!


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## IN HOC SIGNO (9 Aug 2007)

fullmetalparka said:
			
		

> When I told my parents I wanted to join as either a pilot or a radop (way back when). They went absolutely nutters. I mean ballistic! They told me that I would be throwing my life away, and that I would be shot down over some godforsaken country or be left to die in the middle east (Gulf War I had ended a few years ago and they thought it would start right back up). I told them to get bent (I was 14 at the time, and majorly pissed that they did not support me after they said that they would support any career I chose). Things simmered down after a while and they thought that I would never follow through with it. When I graduated, I told them that I would be joining right after I got a degree (which I planned to do at the RMC). They offered to pay my tuition for UBC in full, on the promise that I did something "productive, not destructive" with my life. Their idea of productive was sitting at a desk 24/7 being a slave to my cellphone, fiddling around with stock options, or sitting in a cubicle for 33% of my adult life tinkering with lines of code on a computer. I graduate in '09, and I plan on joining either as an LCIS tech, a Sig Op, or a Pilot (I still haven't decided  :-\). The only person that has been supportive is one of my friends and my grandmother. I fully intend on keeping my family's military history intact (1 RCAF, 1 RCN, 1 army during WWII), even though it has been largely forgotten by a majority of its members. My mom still say I'm going to get killed and be forced to be one of Bush's kill-bots (flower child in the '60s  :) and my dad still says he'll write me out of the will (which isn't an empty threat). Doesn't matter to me. There is no higher honor than serving your country proudly. That in itself is worth all the tense family reunions I see in my future .
> 
> Suck on that, flower children!



You go man! I think you may find they will come around once you're in and they see some of the positive stuff happening in your life. If not...hey it's your life to live and you only get one of them...live without regret.


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## geo (9 Aug 2007)

fullmetalparka said:
			
		

> They told me that I would be throwing my life away, and that I would be shot down over some godforsaken country or be left to die in the middle east
> 
> and my dad still says he'll write me out of the will (which isn't an empty threat). Doesn't matter to me. There is no higher honor than serving your country proudly. That in itself is worth all the tense family reunions I see in my future .
> 
> Suck on that, flower children!


well... If you do get shot down in a blaze of glory, being written out of the will will be the least of your concerns


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## GUNS (9 Aug 2007)

09 is a long way off and you may go through several career decisions by then.

Military is a excellent lifestyle and I commend your desire to join.

My two daughters were considering the military, both are Engineer's. One is a Structural Engineer and the other is a Civil Engineer.

When they got their degree's, they decided against the military and the fantastic signing bonus.

If the military is in your blood than sometime in 09 you will be posting to this site, informing us of your progression through training.

Good Luck.


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## Arty God (9 Aug 2007)

Good on ya, This is going to be the best experience you ever had. For your friends and family they are just worried about you going over seas. Enjoy you are going to have more fun they you ever expected

Unique


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## FullMetalParka (9 Aug 2007)

'09 is a long way off, can't wait to get the ball rolling. Thanks for the support everyone!


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## megany (9 Aug 2007)

Hey fullmetal parka - I'm going to apply in late 2008 or early 2009.  I haven't completely told my parents yet, although I think my father has probably made an educated guess.  He was enlisted and worked as an aeroengine tech with SAR in Summerside, Trenton and Comox.

My goal is to be a military pilot.  That dream was shattered when I got my first pair of glasses shortly after I turned 16.  I knew I wouldn't be content with anything else, so I ignored other military options, checking out the recruiting page every few months to see if there had been any changes.  I went to university, spent a semester in South Korea where I befriended a Lt-Col (ret'd) from the US Military who brought me out for too many nights of drinking, stories and discussion.  Kept checking the recruiting website.  Returned to Canada, threw myself into accounting, accepted a job in Calgary with a prominent firm, started there last September.  I have 32 months from September 2006 of work I need to do until I can qualify for my CA designation.  I write the "big exam" in September 2008, get results in November 2008 and will be applying the week after.  It's going to be hard explaining the "giving up a good job" thing to my co-workers, especially since everyone is so money driven.

I won't tell my employer until/unless I have an offer... but until then?  I'm going to be in the best shape of my life, I'm going to preserve my vision, I'm going to keep volunteering and I'm going to get ready to have the best pilot application possible.  I don't see a lot of posts from other females with similar goals on this website... I want to make sure I'm the girl at St Jean who can play just as hard as the boys!

I'm actually scared to tell my parents, which is why I'm going to put it off.  My friends are generally supportive - once they get over the initial shock.  Some don't believe me at all, and I've only gotten one negative reaction.  That being said, I've maybe told six people!


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## IN HOC SIGNO (10 Aug 2007)

megsy said:
			
		

> Hey fullmetal parka - I'm going to apply in late 2008 or early 2009.  I haven't completely told my parents yet, although I think my father has probably made an educated guess.  He was enlisted and worked as an aeroengine tech with SAR in Summerside, Trenton and Comox.
> 
> My goal is to be a military pilot.  That dream was shattered when I got my first pair of glasses shortly after I turned 16.  I knew I wouldn't be content with anything else, so I ignored other military options, checking out the recruiting page every few months to see if there had been any changes.  I went to university, spent a semester in South Korea where I befriended a Lt-Col (ret'd) from the US Military who brought me out for too many nights of drinking, stories and discussion.  Kept checking the recruiting website.  Returned to Canada, threw myself into accounting, accepted a job in Calgary with a prominent firm, started there last September.  I have 32 months from September 2006 of work I need to do until I can qualify for my CA designation.  I write the "big exam" in September 2008, get results in November 2008 and will be applying the week after.  It's going to be hard explaining the "giving up a good job" thing to my co-workers, especially since everyone is so money driven.
> 
> ...



Good for you. It's great to have a dream and follow it through. Are you going to have laser surgery for your eyes? I'm pretty sure they are still pretty strict about the 20/20 rule. Good luck and God bless you as you prepare for a great adventure.


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## megany (10 Aug 2007)

IN HOC SIGNO said:
			
		

> Good for you. It's great to have a dream and follow it through. Are you going to have laser surgery for your eyes? I'm pretty sure they are still pretty strict about the 20/20 rule. Good luck and God bless you as you prepare for a great adventure.



They're actually accepting people who wear glasses for "moderate vision correction".  I actually booked an eye appointment for the day after I spoke with the recruiter so that I would have an idea of whether I require a "moderate correction" or not.  The optometrist said I would qualify to be a police officer and that my eyes, when working together, are approximately 20/25, which he would "definitely classify as a low correction."  Further searches on this website have identified (a few times) that vision category V2 is what pilots now need to be... and I seem to surpass that category by a wide margin.  My worst eye is about 20/50 or 20/60... 

Laser surgery is still unacceptable, based on the lack of long-term studies.  There are also theories that having laser eye surgery could be problematic for the ejection seat since the surgery involves slicing a part of your eye.

I'm so excited now.  I just feel so motivated - and I really feel like I've been dragging a bit since entering the corporate world after graduation.


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## IN HOC SIGNO (10 Aug 2007)

megsy said:
			
		

> They're actually accepting people who wear glasses for "moderate vision correction".  I actually booked an eye appointment for the day after I spoke with the recruiter so that I would have an idea of whether I require a "moderate correction" or not.  The optometrist said I would qualify to be a police officer and that my eyes, when working together, are approximately 20/25, which he would "definitely classify as a low correction."  Further searches on this website have identified (a few times) that vision category V2 is what pilots now need to be... and I seem to surpass that category by a wide margin.  My worst eye is about 20/50 or 20/60...
> 
> Laser surgery is still unacceptable, based on the lack of long-term studies.  There are also theories that having laser eye surgery could be problematic for the ejection seat since the surgery involves slicing a part of your eye.
> 
> I'm so excited now.  I just feel so motivated - and I really feel like I've been dragging a bit since entering the corporate world after graduation.



Yeah that's understandable. It sounds like you've really done your homework and that's a good thing. We certainly need pilots and we need motivated ones too...not just folks training for Air Canada. You must keep us informed how you progress. some others have started a thread like..."Airmich's Story" or "Pea's Story" and we've been able to follow and encourage as they pass their various challenges and courses etc. Once again good luck to you and God bless.


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## FullMetalParka (10 Aug 2007)

megsy said:
			
		

> Hey fullmetal parka - I'm going to apply in late 2008 or early 2009.  I haven't completely told my parents yet, although I think my father has probably made an educated guess.  He was enlisted and worked as an aeroengine tech with SAR in Summerside, Trenton and Comox.
> 
> My goal is to be a military pilot.  That dream was shattered when I got my first pair of glasses shortly after I turned 16.  I knew I wouldn't be content with anything else, so I ignored other military options, checking out the recruiting page every few months to see if there had been any changes.  I went to university, spent a semester in South Korea where I befriended a Lt-Col (ret'd) from the US Military who brought me out for too many nights of drinking, stories and discussion.  Kept checking the recruiting website.  Returned to Canada, threw myself into accounting, accepted a job in Calgary with a prominent firm, started there last September.  I have 32 months from September 2006 of work I need to do until I can qualify for my CA designation.  I write the "big exam" in September 2008, get results in November 2008 and will be applying the week after.  It's going to be hard explaining the "giving up a good job" thing to my co-workers, especially since everyone is so money driven.
> 
> ...



That's too bad about your vision. I thought that they're starting to let people with corrected eyesight in?

Good luck with getting your CA! My grandfather got his accounting certification (I don't know if they had CA's back then) and he made loads of money, but wished he could've had a job where he didn't have to sit behind a desk all the time. I suggest telling your parents after you get your degree. They'l lbe much more receptive.

Good luck!


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## Hogie (13 Aug 2007)

My mom had some 1970's idea that only dirtbags and juvenile delinquents joined the army, and certainly not girls.  She was really hostile about it for a long time, but since I have been a reservist for 15 years and financially support my husband and child on it I haven't heard much disrespect from her lately.  

My dad never said a word for or against, but after I showed him my last spectacular PER he actually send me an email saying how proud he was, I almost fell out of my chair and couldn't concentrate on work for the rest of the day.  I guess he was trying to give me heart attack.

My common-law husband had a dad who was a light colonel in WWII and an uncle who was a decorated general, and from what I can determine suffered from untreated post-traumatic stress, which a lot of WWII vets did, and which took the form of drinking.  So even though his dad was once the CO of my unit, every time I even mention thinking about deployment he goes ballistic and starts screaming about cannon-fodder, etc, etc.  And I'm a clerk for God's sake.

However I see a lot more enthusiastic than un-enthusiastic parents at the recruiting centre where I work, the Maritimes are supposed have a stronger tradition of service anyway (partly due to high unemployment, partly to culture).  A very hippy-chick looking mom came in the other day and I expected a blast from her, but she actually proclaimed "Who _wouldn't_ want their son to join the military!" and I was quite surprised.  One of my few negative experiences (besides little kids screaming "War Woman"!)  came from a mom whose daughter had quit BMQ, she called up asking how I could send people to A'stan who had no combat experience (as if I had personally commanded them into battle), and I admit I was bad - I replied that how are they supposed to get combat experience without going into combat? I couldn't help it, it was too obvious, I know we're not supposed to say stuff like that. :-X

Bottom line is, no matter what your parents may think, some of the finest, most well-educated, respectable, good people in this country are in the military and if combat is their issue, assure them that not everybody gets to go on deployment.


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## PMedMoe (13 Aug 2007)

Excellent post, Hogie!!


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## IN HOC SIGNO (13 Aug 2007)

PMedMoe said:
			
		

> Excellent post, Hogie!!



I agree you beat me to it. Your response to that lady reminds me of the time a woman was sitting across from me and I was informing her that her request was unreasonable and that by regulations she and her husband were not entitled. I was as kind and compassionate as can be for the entire interview and then she said "If you don't do something now I'm calling my MP!"I  shut my book and said "All right Ma'am, why don't you just go do that....this interview is over."  I have a similar response to those who say they are going to the media. If I can help I will, if not I try to explain why, if you threaten, abuse or try to manipulate me then I'm wasting my time. If they think the media or the MP can get it done then hey....fill your boots.


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## Hogie (13 Aug 2007)

Thanks...As for media/MP/ombudsman threats from people who can't understand that they can't get what they want by throwing fits, the rules are the rules and for a reason...I agree totally, I could give really entertaining examples but probably shouldn't.  However to get back on topic, people who are applying should keep in mind two things: if you are underage you need parental consent but if you are legal age you should go ahead and go for what you want, and once you get through the basic training stage and into your career hopefully your family will see that their disapproval was unfounded.

I've seen many a young guy (and quite a few girls) not doing anything with their lives, then decide to take the plunge, and a few years down the road they're driving a new vehicle, new house, new wife, new life, happy as the proverbial pig in poo.  And a lot of guys who got out, couldn't stand civvie life anymore, and re-enlisted happily.  Of course it's not for everyone but my advice is to give it a shot, lots of times girlfriends/boyfriends object and people drop out and ruin everything for someone they won't be with in a year's time.  As for the dumb questions, we've all gotten them, don't be provoked into a rude response, try to make it sly - you know, logical and based on fact even it will be lost on the person.

I think I have bad attitude towards the general public!


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## Yasa (14 Aug 2007)

Hey, my first post!

Although I'm not in yet, I do have my papers and I'm just waiting until I'm back from a brief vacation to send them in.  I've been tossing the idea around of being in the military ever since I can remember and the past 3 years have been very serious with regards to thought and preparation.  I told my parents I wanted to be a reservist when I was 16 and the reaction was more along the lines of "this is just a fad", however; despite being persistent, it was my mom that gave the final word; "no".  I saw it coming anyway.  Now that I'm 19, the past year has switched from reserve to reg. force.  A decision I've not made without looking into what I would be "getting myself into".  The reaction from my parents was actually much better.  My mom still didn't agree but she finally said "I don't like the idea, but I'm proud of you and I will support you."  My dad supported both the idea and myself.

The reaction from my friends was mixed.  My really good friend of almost 13 years seemed almost indifferent at first but warmed up to the idea.  Another friend of mine decided to grab a set of forms as well for reserves.  I already have a friend in the reserves and his reaction was fairly positive.  It was the reaction of the friend of 13 years that struck me as a surprise.  She went totally ballistic on me, which kind of put me in a bitter mood although I really expected a reaction like this sooner or later.  A mutual friend of ours also had a quite negative reaction.  Lots of yelling ensued.

The problem I had with people is that they mostly associate the CF with Afghanistan and Afghanistan with senseless killing and murder, etc.  Then there's the association of "army = meat heads."  I've gotten tired of correcting these people and I just let them believe what they want to.  The fact of the matter is this country is a great country and will stay a great country because of it's military.  The mentality of there being a war involving Canada and people thinking "well, somebody else will fight it while we enjoy our lives and belittle those fighting" just does not do it for me.  The fact that there are people already fighting and I'm sitting here on my computer waiting to go on vacation still makes me feel a tad guilty.

I may not like these peoples' opinions but I am willing to fight so they at least can have them.  I suppose that is very similar to Voltaire.

Yasa


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## Rick Ruter (14 Aug 2007)

megsy said:
			
		

> They're actually accepting people who wear glasses for "moderate vision correction".  I actually booked an eye appointment for the day after I spoke with the recruiter so that I would have an idea of whether I require a "moderate correction" or not.  The optometrist said I would qualify to be a police officer and that my eyes, when working together, are approximately 20/25, which he would "definitely classify as a low correction."  Further searches on this website have identified (a few times) that vision category V2 is what pilots now need to be... and I seem to surpass that category by a wide margin.  My worst eye is about 20/50 or 20/60...
> 
> Laser surgery is still unacceptable, based on the lack of long-term studies.  There are also theories that having laser eye surgery could be problematic for the ejection seat since the surgery involves slicing a part of your eye.
> 
> I'm so excited now.  I just feel so motivated - and I really feel like I've been dragging a bit since entering the corporate world after graduation.



Hey Megsy,

Good on you for doing this. Here is my two cents on your situation.

1st get your CA designation because you always want a safety net when dealing with joining the CF. I won't lie to you, Pilot is very popular and although we accept V2 standards, most applicants show up with flying experience as well. The vision factor will not be discrimatory so don't worry about that. While you are making some $$$ being an accountant, get some flying time and preferably your Private Pilot Licence (PPL) so when you show up at the CFRC, you have some weight to your application.

Keep the dream alive it's worht it.


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