# "Your file was refreshingly boring."



## hotei (29 Mar 2009)

I always knew I wasn't military material, I don't know how I knew it, or why I thought it, but that is a thought that has danced between my ears for years (and considering there ain't much between my ears -- you can be sure that is a thought that stood out).

When I first had the spark of interest, way back in 2003, I was a chubby lad of 17 and I got to tour the HMCS Summerside (and, on a side note, the HMS Bounty -- tres cool!) in, of all places: Summerside, PEI. I had the glossy brochure in hand, and while the jobs sounded exciting and certainly interesting, the physical portion stood out like an old, hand-forged rusty nail.

Nineteen push-ups? Impossible! 

Nineteen sit-ups? Unthinkable!

2.4km run in ANY amount of time? Buh-bye, see ya later, au revoir mon ami.

I thought to myself: "self, I can't do that."

But I tried.... and failed.... miserably. I couldn't do a single push up, my sit-ups numbered less then ten (not to mention they were sloppier than a pig in a mud bath), and as for my running. Let's just say I think a dead, flayed, and smoked tortoise ran faster. I had washed out before I even began.

Even though I figured I hadn't a hope in Hell, I felt that my physical capabilities were, shall we say lacking (others might actually call it laughable...). So, I figured, perhaps I ought to work on that (all the while my body was contemplating killing me just to stop its pain).

Fast forward to February 2009. I am now running 10k every second day, I am able to do a hundred sit-ups at a time (the last forty are a pain no man can describe), and fifty push-ups besides. But for whatever reason, my mind still keeps telling me:

"You're not military material."

"Why not?" I ask myself honestly.

"F*** if I know. I am your subconscious, not your freakin' psychiatrist."

"Oh. sorry."

(Apparently my subconscious also has an attitude problem.)

So, I decide it can't hurt to put my file in. Despite getting a bit of a run around with the initial recruitment phase, I finally made it to my CFAT test. I thought to myself, what the heck, if nothing else I made $60 bucks in travel pay (best lunch I have had in a while!).

I sat down for the test, and once all the rigamarole with the drug-sheets was completed, then the waiting game began. The lady at the CFRC said: everyone just wait in this room and a career counsellor will be with you shortly. Of the 8 people in the room, five got called out. The last three of us in the room all looked around at one another with furtive glances. Thirty minutes went by. Then forty. The last three of us were by this point wondering what happened. 

Were we the condemned? The ones who had simply not made the grade, and the counsellors were just outside drawing straws to see who got to break us the news? The tension, I must admit, was pretty high.

Then the lady returned. This is it. Here it comes. She opened her mouth:

"Okay you guys all qualified for your trades, we'll be giving you a call next week to schedule your physicals and interviews."

The sound of the last three of us letting out our breaths was hilarious.

The physical was a piece of cake. I sat down with the medical fellow who poked, proded and nudged me. I peed in the cup ("You must love your job," I said as I handed the fellow his souvenir of my visit). Off I went to the interview.

The captain I spoke with was a nice fellow. Very up front, very frank, and seemed to know how to handle the paper work. I will add, for all those reading (yeah, all two of you), that the interview prep form isn't worth your time. Most of the questions can be answered johnny-on-the-spot. All I will say is make sure you know the general duties that are listed on the website.

Anyway, the captain said that he worked with a lot of rubbernecks (291, 000120, otherwise known as Communications Research Operator) and said that I seemed to have the aptitude, personality and sense of humour that would fit right in with them (I am still not sure is that was a compliment...) and that I would really enjoy my time there. So, he convinced me that I ought to drop my other two choices, and just focus on that one. Fine by me, I said.

He finished up the conversation by saying that my BackCheck should be completed before the end of the week, and that I should be merit listed by same. Sometime after that, I should get the call, and he said you could be off as soon as May. 

This past week has been full of anxiousness. I kept my cell phone by me, but I tried as best as I could to keep the thought out of my head.

Monday. Tuesday. Wednesday. Thursday. Friday.

Nothing.

So around noon on Friday, I thought to myself perhaps I should give the good captain a quick call. Can't hurt. Right?

Well, after nearly 20 minutes, I had the answer I had expected. "Your file is still in processing."

"Ah, okay," I said. "Should I call back in two weeks time then?"

"Oh, i am pretty sure you will hear something before then."

I hung up the phone, and went about my day (a couple of my family were under the weather, so I was playing nursemaid). Admist the hack, wheezing and calls for soup I heard the house phone ring. I thought nothing of it because the CFRC always called my cell phone first, then the house phone.

I picked up the phone, only to find out that I had a job offer. Communications Research Operator (Army). I was shocked, excited, and trying desperately to keep my voice down so that I didn't wake anyone. I accepted on the spot.

I get sworn in on the 7th, and I leave on the 19th by carpool to get to St. Jean for sometime around noon. My course starts on the 20th.

Perhaps the best line, however came at the end of the conversation with my file manager, after he welcomed me to the position.

"You know, your file was refreshingly boring."

Never thought my boring personality would come in so handy. 

heh.

Well, that is that. I have a feeling the "your-thank-you-speech-is-taking-too-long" music came on a long time ago, so I guess I will just say: see, if I can do it, anyone can! >


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## muskrat89 (29 Mar 2009)

A boring file perhaps, but a refreshing post. Best of luck to you, and congratulations.


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## Fiver (29 Mar 2009)

You know, your prose was exceedingly enjoyable.


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## PMedMoe (29 Mar 2009)

Yes, excellent post.  Do you happen to write as a hobby?  If not, you should.  Good luck!


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## Mike Baker (29 Mar 2009)

PMedMoe said:
			
		

> Yes, excellent post.  Do you happen to write as a hobby?  If not, you should.  Good luck!


I totally agree with you. This was a very enjoyable read. Good luck Hotei!


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## Journeyman (29 Mar 2009)

hotei said:
			
		

> "Why not?" I ask myself honestly.
> 
> "F*** if I know. I am your subconscious, not your freakin' psychiatrist."
> 
> ...


 :rofl:
You should hear some of the trash-talk from the voices in my head!


Oh...and 291'ers are _rubberheads_, not "rubbernecks"


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## hotei (29 Mar 2009)

I would like to thank all of you for your kind words and encouragement!  

As I said before in another post, now all I am hoping for it to make it through the MEGA with all limbs securely fastened, and with my seat and tray-table in the upright position.  ;D


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## hotei (29 Mar 2009)

Journeyman said:
			
		

> :rofl:
> You should hear some of the trash-talk from the voices in my head!
> 
> 
> Oh...and 291'ers are _rubberheads_, not "rubbernecks"



Journeyman, thank you for the clarification. I have had two people (both the captain whom I discussed this with, and another fellow who was a member of PPCLI) use the term rubberneck. It was explained to me, it comes from staring at the "boring" screen and then having them nod off and wake up (hence "rubbernecking").

That being said, I have seen a number of posts on the milnet forums using both the term "rubberneck" and "rubberhead". Glad to finally have that clarified!



> I totally agree with you. This was a very enjoyable read. Good luck *Hotie!*



And if you are going to be using that kind of language with me fella, you best be buying me dinner first  :rofl:.

Thanks again all!


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## updatelee (29 Mar 2009)

Good read, thanks for the post hotei.


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## JBoyd (29 Mar 2009)

A great read, good luck on course hotei


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## Mike Baker (29 Mar 2009)

hotei said:
			
		

> And if you are going to be using that kind of language with me fella, you best be buying me dinner first  :rofl:.


Seen and fixed.

Silly type-o


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## GDawg (29 Mar 2009)

Hopefully boring = good for your security clearance!


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## psychedelics07 (29 Mar 2009)

3 people replied during the time it took for me to read the initial post.

As everyone else has already said,  great post,    and I will see you on the 20th!


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## Dante43 (29 Mar 2009)

Dude, that post was hilarious and entertaining , me too, something i feel that way, i got to admit at the summer of 08 i was barely able to do 5 regular push up ( hand large then shoulder witdh), now i can do 15-20 but still need to work some more on it.


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## fire_guy686 (29 Mar 2009)

Great post and best of luck on your course.


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## Azizti (29 Mar 2009)

Great post! Very refreshing, and I'm sure it will motivate a few people that think they cannot do it either.
Grats on the job offer and goodluck on your BMQ!


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## newmet (30 Mar 2009)

Well, in your post you thought only 2 people would read this and at the time I started posting it had been read 575 times.  
Very good post, keep your sense of humor intact for basic and you will do fine.  Good luck!


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## mssdonna (30 Mar 2009)

Way to go Hotei.

Enjoy BMQ...and hope the voices just as much.


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## AlphaQup (23 Apr 2009)

Awesome read, not boring at all.


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## SARgirl (4 Jun 2009)

Well written... I enjoyed reading your post.  Perhaps a career in CF Journalism would work well for you- just a thought.


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## EW (4 Jun 2009)

hotei said:
			
		

> Journeyman, thank you for the clarification. I have had two people (both the captain whom I discussed this with, and another fellow who was a member of PPCLI) use the term rubberneck. It was explained to me, it comes from staring at the "boring" screen and then having them nod off and wake up (hence "rubbernecking").
> 
> That being said, I have seen a number of posts on the milnet forums using both the term "rubberneck" and "rubberhead". Glad to finally have that clarified!
> 
> ...



Great post and good luck in the trade.

With 20+ years as a rubberhead (now retired) I can give you the definitive history of the term.  Not many people know it, as the cause of the nickname is long gone.  Your PPCLI friend is way off... the expression goes back far before computer screens were common in our vehicles and stations.  Rubberhead is a reference to the very big earphones (more like headphones) that the guys used to wear on the out-stations.  With 10-25 operators all pounding on keyboards and cursing and swearing at ghosts, it was imperative that their headphones could block out some of the noises around them, as they concentrated on the faintest pieces of static - trying to glean something useful.  These BIG rubber headphones led to other trades (techs/support) calling the operators 'rubberheads.'  Those days are long gone (preceded my entry in the late eighties), but the name has stuck around.

You'll learn to think of it as an affectionate term - unless its from an Int Op, in which case it is probably meant to be sarcastic (I say that with 20 years of respect for Int Ops); and now you know its meaning.  Good luck in the Comm Rsch world, you'll have your trials and tribulations, and find that the trade is going through its issues with high turnover of leadership (as per the rest of the CF) - but in the end, it is a great career.


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## BlueJingo (5 Jun 2009)

LOL i'm still wondering how much of a sense of humour Comm Rsch has! 
Why did the rubber chicken cross the road? (no offense hehe)


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