Given these ongoing circumstances facing military families, when a military service member or Veteran experiences an OSI, the impacts on the mental health and well-being of the family need to be better understood. Research on historic conflicts has suggested that the presence of an OSI is correlated with significantly higher rates of mental health problems in spouses and children when compared to those in military families with no OSI and civilian families. While there has been increasing attention in Canadian society on OSIs and those who have served in CAF, there has been much less focus on the impact OSI has had on children and spouses in military families and on family life and functioning more broadly (Brannen, Grandia, Stewart, Zahradnik, & McGrath, 2008).
My question is about The Caregiver Recognition Benefit. Having a disability sometimes means you need ongoing care to remain in your home. The Caregiver Recognition Benefit recognise the important role a caregiver delivers on a day-to-day basis by providing them with a tax free, monthly benefit.
My story: I asked for help from various Medical Staff since coming back from Afghanistan for over 10 years and was told I had nothing wrong with me (even thou friends around me knew the signs and tried to convince me to seek help - but to trust he Medical Staff was out of the question). Meanwhile, I was trying to deal with numerous mental heath problems and at times breaking down when on when no one was around and at times thinking the only way out was a bullet to the head. There was one or two times where I broke down but no one knew what to do. Fighting fatigue each night knowing my nightmares started once I went to bed and awakening hours later , lying there waiting for at least 30 minutes to bring my heart rate and my emotions to come back to earth drained me for years. I didn't know who I was when I looked in the mirror - I pretended to be the person everyone wanted me to be. Our military structure is what kept me going for all these years.
One day my life took a turn - during Covid I was driving home and was going to kill myself when an Angel reached out to me (a Social Worker called me and told me she was going over my records and realised I was calling out for help for years). She must have sensed the tone in my my voice and asked me if i was thinking about killing myself. It took me over 1 year to build the trust and break down some of my manly, fatherly, supervisor barriers before meeting her in person and another 6 months to convince me to have a mental assessment done.
I was finally diagnosed with having an OSI after having an assessment done. I changed Social Workers after one year to see if he could find the magic cure and help me to deal with my issues - issues that showed its ugly head only at nights (I know if an assessment was done during the night time - I would be off the scales). Yes, I was becoming more emotional at the same time and was understanding a little bit what I was going through. It took me another 3 months to apply for a VAC account expecting my supervisor to tell me anytime that they knew what I was doing (I was paranoid if someone found out). It took me another few months to build up the courage to apply to VAC by writing about my issues, concerns, etc. During those times I had discuss my issues with an ex-military member after breaking down in front of him. After talking for hours, it felt like a ton of emotional weight was lifted off me and I felt free (this lasted for a short while). Writing my statement to VAC took another 3 painful - emotional months to write about my issues.
It was like a roller coaster during the 3 months it took to write about my experiences during my career. As I dealt with each issue, emotions flooded in and out as new experience were discovered. There were times where my body trembled so much from my emotions to where I couldn't see though my tears. I was amazed (3 months) it took for VAC to recognise my issues and give me a payout (all I wanted was to have the tools and resources provided to deal with my issues when I get out of the military - money doesn't solve my issues. Writing things like this release stress and emotions for me.
I discovered when I was writing to VAC that my family was impacted by my life style. Walking around trying not to set me off, and my wife making excuses or covering up for me. She never worked full time after the kids were born, knowing that she should be home. I found out and was surprised (embarrassed) while writing to VAC all the issues that my beautiful wife and kids dealt with. I asked VAC why my wife couldn't be compensated for what she went through and is still going through, and they mention something about she didn't fit the requirement or I wasn't diagnosed with PTSD. I find there is an injustice to her and for me seeking help for years and being ignored. I plan to fight for me wife to get something from the research conducted on families and members diagnosed with OSIs. 1. I'm looking for anyone that could provide me with information or will i be wasting my time (I'm also thinking of other families that suffered). 2. Myself, I waited over 10 years before a Medical Member admitted that they knew I had an issues and never received the help i asked for- should I fight for money, knowing if I win others could benefit.
My question is about The Caregiver Recognition Benefit. Having a disability sometimes means you need ongoing care to remain in your home. The Caregiver Recognition Benefit recognise the important role a caregiver delivers on a day-to-day basis by providing them with a tax free, monthly benefit.
My story: I asked for help from various Medical Staff since coming back from Afghanistan for over 10 years and was told I had nothing wrong with me (even thou friends around me knew the signs and tried to convince me to seek help - but to trust he Medical Staff was out of the question). Meanwhile, I was trying to deal with numerous mental heath problems and at times breaking down when on when no one was around and at times thinking the only way out was a bullet to the head. There was one or two times where I broke down but no one knew what to do. Fighting fatigue each night knowing my nightmares started once I went to bed and awakening hours later , lying there waiting for at least 30 minutes to bring my heart rate and my emotions to come back to earth drained me for years. I didn't know who I was when I looked in the mirror - I pretended to be the person everyone wanted me to be. Our military structure is what kept me going for all these years.
One day my life took a turn - during Covid I was driving home and was going to kill myself when an Angel reached out to me (a Social Worker called me and told me she was going over my records and realised I was calling out for help for years). She must have sensed the tone in my my voice and asked me if i was thinking about killing myself. It took me over 1 year to build the trust and break down some of my manly, fatherly, supervisor barriers before meeting her in person and another 6 months to convince me to have a mental assessment done.
I was finally diagnosed with having an OSI after having an assessment done. I changed Social Workers after one year to see if he could find the magic cure and help me to deal with my issues - issues that showed its ugly head only at nights (I know if an assessment was done during the night time - I would be off the scales). Yes, I was becoming more emotional at the same time and was understanding a little bit what I was going through. It took me another 3 months to apply for a VAC account expecting my supervisor to tell me anytime that they knew what I was doing (I was paranoid if someone found out). It took me another few months to build up the courage to apply to VAC by writing about my issues, concerns, etc. During those times I had discuss my issues with an ex-military member after breaking down in front of him. After talking for hours, it felt like a ton of emotional weight was lifted off me and I felt free (this lasted for a short while). Writing my statement to VAC took another 3 painful - emotional months to write about my issues.
It was like a roller coaster during the 3 months it took to write about my experiences during my career. As I dealt with each issue, emotions flooded in and out as new experience were discovered. There were times where my body trembled so much from my emotions to where I couldn't see though my tears. I was amazed (3 months) it took for VAC to recognise my issues and give me a payout (all I wanted was to have the tools and resources provided to deal with my issues when I get out of the military - money doesn't solve my issues. Writing things like this release stress and emotions for me.
I discovered when I was writing to VAC that my family was impacted by my life style. Walking around trying not to set me off, and my wife making excuses or covering up for me. She never worked full time after the kids were born, knowing that she should be home. I found out and was surprised (embarrassed) while writing to VAC all the issues that my beautiful wife and kids dealt with. I asked VAC why my wife couldn't be compensated for what she went through and is still going through, and they mention something about she didn't fit the requirement or I wasn't diagnosed with PTSD. I find there is an injustice to her and for me seeking help for years and being ignored. I plan to fight for me wife to get something from the research conducted on families and members diagnosed with OSIs. 1. I'm looking for anyone that could provide me with information or will i be wasting my time (I'm also thinking of other families that suffered). 2. Myself, I waited over 10 years before a Medical Member admitted that they knew I had an issues and never received the help i asked for- should I fight for money, knowing if I win others could benefit.
