Yuck - that was badly worded and hard to read....
To your point which is valid and in my opinion is the crux, it is an individual's motives that determine right and wrong.
Britain firebombed Germany to accelerate the end of the war, but then proved with its reconstruction efforts that their overall objective was de-Nazification.
The United States has gone into Iraq and will spend a minimum of $500 billion out of pocket in the effort to change regimes, to start the rebuilding process and hopefully nurture a young democracy.
In my opinion, although violent, these are examples of noble intervention.
The Al-Qaeda Fighter intentionally sacrifices himself in this planet proving his dedication to Allah by killing as many infidels (which is religiously defined, not politically defined) as possible so he may acheive martyrdom in the next life.
The Sunni Nationalist Fighter kills to undermine a democracy that if successful will put them in the position of a minority after they abused/murdered/maimed the two groups that will form the majority. In essence, they wish to return to what they perceive as their rightful position as the dictators of Iraq and all its wealth with the apostate Shia and Kurds as their servents of convenience at best, and ethnic cleansing targets at worst.
....both in essence are 100% selfish motives in which they are willing to kill for their own ends.
Bottom Line: It is motives that determine right and wrong, and when you look at different groups it is easy to see the difference.
Matthew.