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Military Singles

    Retired CC, nope, didn't take offense at anything.  At my age, there's not much at all that really offends me (at least, nothing that wouldn't offend us all).

    Everyone has great suggestions, but even most of them won't work here, MAYBE the problem is that I just need a kick in the butt for the heck of it.  Frankly, I'm surprised that I haven't yet seen a post that says "TOUGH LUCK, SUCKER, THAT'S THE CAREER YOU PICKED, SUCH IS THE LIFE, SUCK IT UP AND CARRY ON  :crybaby: ", or something to that effect.

    For now, I guess, a day at a time.  And yeah, SOMEDAY, perhaps I will meet that someone special. 



 
Redneck said:
    Retired CC, nope, didn't take offense at anything.  At my age, there's not much at all that really offends me (at least, nothing that wouldn't offend us all).

    Everyone has great suggestions, but even most of them won't work here, MAYBE the problem is that I just need a kick in the butt for the heck of it.  Frankly, I'm surprised that I haven't yet seen a post that says "TOUGH LUCK, SUCKER, THAT'S THE CAREER YOU PICKED, SUCH IS THE LIFE, SUCK IT UP AND CARRY ON  :crybaby: ", or something to that effect.

    For now, I guess, a day at a time.  And yeah, SOMEDAY, perhaps I will meet that someone special. 

" MAYBE the problem is that I just need a kick in the butt"

I think you just gave it to yourself.
 
re: online dating

camochick said:
... I find that if you chat online with them for awhile, ask them all the right questions and then move to a phone conversation or two before the initial date you can usually weed out the weirdos. Like i said before, for anyone, male or female, be really careful who you meet in person. Make sure someone knows where you are and who you are with. Never tell them where you live or work. Meet them in a public place. Never get in a car with them. Trust your instincts, if someone is giving you the creeps then end the date and call a friend to come get you. Just some safety tips for the world of online dating.   >:D

NOW you tell me ... (i.e. my friends made me promise to NEVER go on a blind date ever again, after I ended up being stalked ... now referred to as the infamous "Shallow Hal" incident ...)
 
bossi said:
NOW you tell me ... (i.e. my friends made me promise to NEVER go on a blind date ever again, after I ended up being stalked ... now referred to as the infamous "Shallow Hal" incident ...)

So... she was hypnotized into dating you (and then "pursuing") ?
 
I just became single again....it was one of those military relationships where if its a weak relationship, it just gets weaker.  Like seriously, who goes to Cold Lake and doesn't tell their girlfriend?  But even though that relationship didnt work out, its not going to prevent me from seeing military guys again  :D
 
Here is my low down

1) yes clubs and groups is the good place to meet someone much better then the bars.
2) on-line dating such as lavalife are becoming huge for people looking for more then a one night stand ie again better then the bars
3) now here is the big one stop looking if you go to clubs and things like that to meet women , it is my experience that woemen can smell that from a mile away and will avoid you. If you go there with a instest in the said activity and just be yourself with no expiation's of meeting a women , then you will meet her. This is how I got to meet my wife, I had come out of a long term relationship and wasn't looking for anything so when we got together it was friendly no expections and very relaxed and things grew from there.

That worked for me the harder I looked the farther away the women stayed, when I stopped looking I found the offers to be much more forth coming. Simply if you aren't looking your attitude isn't needed therefor much more appealing to the opposite sex.
 
    I think Lavalife was the 15th or 16th singles site I've tried.  I've never met anyone (and I've met quite a few) on the sites that thought a long-distance relationship would work.  So being at a semi-remote base pretty much strikes out singles sites.
    As far as clubs, organizations, etc, there's not very much at said location.  Being a very family-oriented community, everyone I've met here is either retired, taken one way or another, married, or too young.  And there's no evening classes in anything as far as I know.
    Someone mentioned just doing the things that I like to do.  Drivng to Jasper four times a year for hardcore camping, hiking, horse-back riding, etc. is one thing, but doing that regularly for a relationship wouldn't work.  There's not much else to do outside on the prairies.
    All very good suggestions in a built-up area like a city, but totally useless in certain locations.
     
 
Your in Wainright, it has over 5 000 people. There has gotta be somebody there. Your in your early fourties, my Grandmother got remarried at about 70 so if my 70 year old grandmother can find somebody I'm sure you've still got hope.
 
There's no Alpine Club around there? I thought they were everywhere. Even if they aren't in your city, you can still join them for hikes to huts in the Jasper area.

I don't know Alberta very well but I looked up the Alpine Club website and they have a clubhouse in Canmore and a hut at Lake Louise http://www.alpineclubofcanada.ca/facility/clubhous.html

If you are the outdoors type, this is a good club to meet people of all ages that share your interest.

You may not meet the love of your life, but at least you'll widen your circle of friends while pursuing something you enjoy.
 
Hey there redneck, you really need to make an attitude adjustment.  You have been getting some very effective advice here and  blowing a lot of it off.  The Alpine Club is certainly a good bet, I lost three good climbing partners  over the years to other club members!    And another thing, don't rule out taking kids on long trips, even in Jasper and other mountain parks.  My toddler went to Jasper with me for a week and she trooped along just fine, even if she did have to be carried from time to time and wasn't willing to go up any major peaks.  If you meet a single mom, she'd probably really appreciate a guy who is willing to involve the child(ren). 

Adjust your sights and  you'll find yourself on target faster than you might expect.  Personally I'm not big on the internet meeting ground but I know many who are and several who have found partners that way. 

I would recommend the advice that you have been given, join some clubs and go on some trips - the ACC has local sections in many areas and they frequently do outings.  If you want to meet someone that shares your interest in the outdoors try that group or other outdoor clubs.  As for the military thing being an issue, a tip there is to pick your battles. If you are going to get into arguments about defence policy with everyone who asks a question, then you won't do well.  If people ask you about your chosen career and you give them short honest answers then that's helpful - just make sure that you are showing interest in what they do and who they are.  give people a chance and give them the opportunity to give you a chance.

 
Well.. I am a single woman in her late 30's and I am actively seeking men in uniform.  I have dated one for 5 years, but it ended when it didn't progress in either direction.  In my past experiences, I have found that some are actually out to find "a stop along the way".  I don't want to be one of those.. I would like to find a military male single who is ready for a committed relationship with someone who is independant and can take care of herself. Being alone for such a long time and raising children alone, I know how to take care of myself for terrific lengths of time.  I am not sure this site is for me.. But I have to try something.. The life of the Man In Uniform is truly intriguing to me, and is the type of life that I am looking for. I have been told that I would not be able to handle it by a man in uniform. I don't believe that is so. The whole familial atmosphere of friends is wide.. and that also is what pulls me towards that life. 

Now if I am out of line here, and my post does not belong in here..  please let me know and I will remove it.. Still navigating and trying to figure out how to find myself a long-term relationship with a Man in Uniform!

Have a great day and stay safe!
Lace
 
Well  I say this thread is about to get a whole lot more interesting!  :P :soldier:

Personally I don't think the uniform makes the man. There are plenty of different men in the military. Some are probably good soul mate material and others are probably just fodder. Sounds to me like you are limiting yourself.

But then again, some women only date business men, or male models, musicians, poets, or what-have-you. So if a military man is what you truly have your heart set on, I'm sure you can make it happen.

Why do you think some guy in uniform told you that you 'won't be able to handle it'? What did he mean by 'it'? His big weapon?  If you handled it for 5 years, you can probably go the distance.

Are you looking for an officer, NCM, JTF2 ninja type or what? Do you prefer army/navy/airforce uniforms?  Be specific because you don't want to waste time on some grunt in cadpat when it's a flyboy you really want.

You should probably open a new thread, give out your height/weight/measurements, post a few pics of yourself, list all your hobbies and interests (other than military men) if you have any and wait for the flood of offers to come rolling in.

Good luck and good on ya knowing what you really want! :D
 
LOL!  Hi ya there..

You are an absolute hoot.  Trust me.. I am 38 and a single parent of a special needs child of which I have raised single handedly.  I have dated men from many walks of life. *yawn* I got bored of the same old thing. As for why I want a man (Army that is)... They have a very unique way about them. Maybe I am a glutton for punishment, who knows?  It is not the uniform that attracts me, it is the man behind the clothes. I think some know exactly what they want and are up front and open andhonest about it. I know there are some players who are looking for a "girl in every port" type thing, but I DO KNOW there are some that have settled down and are not afraid of committment.

That remark about the soul connection, is exactly why we split up finally after 17 months of limbo. He admitted finally that he would always love me, but I would never be a part of his soul. We parted on excellent terms and are still very close in the friend way..  unfortunately, the physical aspect has had to be sequestered :-\ 

The part about asking why I "wouldnt be able to handle it", I believe he was referring to the life of being a soldiers wife.  What he doesn't realize is that I have been raising a child alone for 16 years now. I guess he figured I would not be able to handle the sometimes distance..  both physically/emotionally if he was to go overseas.  I am beginning to think that was just his way of saying.."there is no future for US as a couple".  I am extremely independent and strong and am able to be alone for lengths of time.. my goodness.. 16 years and raising a child with special needs alone?

LMAO at the flyboy remark.. a funny story about one actually.. but will save that for later  ;)

Actually Reg Army all the way!  I really did not have a problem with him becoming emotionally distant at times, I needed my own emotional space as well, so didn't really affect me a great deal of the time.  Even today he says the same thing.. He says I am very special, but if that Soul Connection isn't there.... As for time apart physically.. well I have been alone and to give up my independence all at once would scare the crap out of me. I have never "settled" and lived with anyone since I moved out on my own at 18. I have dated a few military--reg force army-- for the past 10 years and can't seem to get enough of them.  They are a unique person and have many of the qualities I look for.

So, you see, it is not the uniform.  It is the man who is wearing it that catches my interest. 

I will post a pic some day.. but I would really like to get comfy with this site first if that is ok?

Take care and stay safe
Lace

 
I know what you mean. My only fear of it all, is that should I choose to decide to make the CF my career, I hope that I'm able to find someone who's a little flexible with the situation, because many aren't fond of the whole being away for long periods of time thing.
 
Exactly!  I also realize.."some" women have a habit of pulling out that old Tide Box once hubbies leave.. And that is exactly what happened to my ex when he got divorced while over seas in Bosnia.  I can very much understand the effects of something like that happening as it has happened to me too. I think what I am getting at is alot of the "girls" who marry quickly into the Military Life become quite frightened of all the time spent alone while hubbies/bf's are away and find someone closer to hold them.  You have to remember, these girls go from home with mom/dad to a husband that is not there. Issues arise that kill a relationship from fidelity to money issues.  But, rest assured all you guys! There are some of us that have learned life experiences and we are NOT ALL LIKE THAT!  Trust is a huge issue with most of the men in uniform I believe. Neither myself nor the ex questioned each others fidelity, it was just a given....

I was with my ex for 5 years.. and with another for 2 years.  I would like to find a reg force man for lifelong ups, downs, boring times, exciting times, etc.  I think that is part of the excitement. You get to miss each other for periods of time and sparks do fly when you return home.. keeps the excitement part alive and kickin... ya know what I mean ?  :blotto:

Lace
 
yeah... true enough... shit happens I guess... however along with being away for long periods of time, I think the whole training and military bit isn't appealing to many women, I think they just like the uniform... and some of em like the paycheque+benefits that come with it.  ::)
 
You mean they get a paycheck? and benefits? :o  You mean HE could have paid my way to dinner and a movie?  :o  OH MY! I wish someone would have told me about that.. Hmmm  if I was in it for the paycheck and benefits.. I would have had him knock me up so I could get a bit of the cake too!  ;) 

Yes you are so right. There are some out there to reap the "benefits", but the only benefits that I want are the ones you can't buy with money.  And, some actually think that yes, some of us are out for the money.  No, I am not in it myself for the money.  I have my own money, well enough to get me through anyhow.

Good point though! And too true!  :)

Lace
 
"Good looking shoes, a good looking belt and a good looking watch."

But you didn't remind us to wear CLOTHES did you?  'BANG'(sound of TCBF banging head on computer desk).  Don't you think you maybe left out a pretty important part? (BANG).  It all seemed so straightforward and simple (BANG) .  But noooooooo...... (BANG).    At least the female constable was nice to me (BANGBANG).

If my wife is reading this, I'm just kidding. ;D

Tom
 
Lace, good reply! I too have a special needs child so I know how that goes. I think you might be onto somethng here! How close are you to that isolated guy in Alberta? Do you hike? Are you a member of the Alpine Club?

If this all works out I want to be referred to as "She who hooked up those two ships in the night...." no money please, just send referrals :D
 
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