The answer to our crisis of young men? Boy Scouts

[Fishbone Jones]

Toxic femininity? There's plenty of that around also. Boys need to be around men that are positive role models. Hunting, fishing, mechanics, basic building techniques, electrical, plumbing, etc. Those are all things I have introduced my grandson to. Not all men are toxic.

 

[YZT580]

Clarified for you. Toxic masculinity is a thing (not in the weaponized, often memed version found around the internet) and sometimes having "men" mentoring boys is not the panacea is seems.

I would rather competent female leaders in those spaces in lieu of a boorish, imbecilic, "man" in those spaces.


This we can agree with. I value the spaces my kids have to be social without tech, that are well mentored and accessible.

absolutely. But there is a collegiate in Montreal a few years back that took notice of a higher failure rate in all aspects amongst boys. They addressed the problem successfully by having some, not all, classes for boys segregated from girls and with male teachers. Boys have been vilified for the last 20 plus years and made to feel that they are the cause of all the world's ills: especially white boys. They need to be told that Mr. Rogers theme: I like you just the way you are. They need to be shown by example and that example has to come from males. I truly am glad that there are women who have stepped in and taken over some of the leadership in Scouts. I am angry that the absence of good capable men has made their presence essential.

 

[rmc_wannabe]

Toxic femininity? There's plenty of that around also. Boys need to be around men that are positive role models. Hunting, fishing, mechanics, basic building techniques, electrical, plumbing, etc. Those are all things I have introduced my grandson to. Not all men are toxic.

Nowhere in my post did I state that any of those activities are toxic, or that all men are toxic. Additionally, there is toxic femininity (Ask me. Having 6 year old daughter really pointed out that blind spot to me).

My point is that these organizations are all doing the best with what they got. If there are fewer men stepping up to be these mentors that uphold the values of the program, then the purpose of these organizations is even more crucial.

Additionally, we need to be the change we want to see in the world. I habe volunteered with Cadet Corps, Navy League, and with my daughter's Sparks Group. I have a VSS and CPIC on file with all of them. I am there for my kids, but I am also there to demonstrate proper involvement and being present for my kids. There are a lot of Dads that show up, drop off, and fuck off: whatever their reason. I'm not one of them.

 

[Halifax Tar]

The problem with terms of toxicity is its hard to define them, and people with agendas end up using them to vilify their opposition.

 

[Colin Parkinson]

It's incredible hard to get volunteers nowadays. I am losing one of my male officers as another Corp has no male officers and needs one. It's more likely a female will step up to volunteer, than a male. Add on the cost of housing here makes it impossible for our traditional volunteer base to live here and the young people who do are busy working, going to school or both. Our new major demographic (Persian, Mandarin) do not have a history of community volunteering to motivate them as much, that being said I do have one awesome female Persian Officer.

 

[FJAG]

boys need men to be their mentors; setting an example. The women who are leaders do good work but they are only substitutes for what is needed. They also need a place where they are safe and school isn't that. Scouts isn't perfect but for an hour a week the kids aren't texting and that is good.

My dad died when I was 12. The neighbour two houses down from us was the local troop leader with two boys of his own - one my age, one two years younger. He got me to join the troop and basically took me under his wing for the next few years; something I'm still grateful for. You're absolutely right - boys need positive role models and mentors. He wasn't the only one. At 16 I joined the reserves where the leadership basically set me on a 44 year career path.

Funny aside. In the mid 70s when we moved back to Shilo there was no scouting program for a 5-year-old girl so my daughter became Shilo's first girl Beaver almost fifteen years before the movement went co-ed.

On the bad side, I prosecuted a bail pending appeal revocation for a drug consuming scout leader in Lahr who had been found guilty and sentenced to jail for trying to diddle a sergeant major's son while camping.

 

[OldSolduer]

It's incredible hard to get volunteers nowadays.

With the hoops volunteers have to jump through its no wonder. Add to the mix that males have been vilified as "toxic" (even though we know its not true) makes people think twice before volunteering for anything.

 

[JLB50]

Growing up in the U.S. in the 1950s I attended a public school that saw a lot of bullying and fighting amongst boys. Quite often kids would form impromptu gangs and beat up someone they took offence to. Having been on the receiving end a few times, I found that I was tending to become rather like the aggressors I faced.

Sadly, for some reason or other the son of my Cub Scout’s den mother bothered me in one of our den meetings so I ended up picking a fight with him. I became the aggressor. Several weeks elapsed and while attending an event involving local dens, I was gently pulled aside by the head scoutmaster or whatever he was called. He was a veteran who had been disabled during the Second World War and was in a wheelchair pretty much permanently. I remembering him asking me in a kindly way about why I started the fight with the den mother’s son, I’m not sure what I told him but he seemed to be all knowing and kindly. Somehow without necessarily admonishing me but by talking to me and getting me to express what I was feeling inside, I ended up feeling ashamed at having been an aggressor. It was a very powerful learning experience for me and I never again felt the need to pick on others.

It’s too bad that scouting has gotten such a bad rap in recent years. I feel that, more than ever, scouting today could do a lot to help mould the character of boys…before they become men.