Dealing with being home from Kandahar

[William Webb Ellis]

Piper,


Please accept my apology.  Yesterday I was speak to a co-worker and he commented on how I must be happy I was not in any more.  I informed him I had thought of getting back in.  He seemed surprised and mentioned the deaths and injuries sustained in Afghanistan.  I mentioned to him this was a "cost of doing business"......

I realized this morning that it is a cost you have paid, not me.  I am sorry I diminished/devalued you and all the others.

I am sorry.

Take Care

 

[RHFC_piper]

Piper,
Please accept my apology.  Yesterday I was speak to a co-worker and he commented on how I must be happy I was not in any more.  I informed him I had thought of getting back in.  He seemed surprised and mentioned the deaths and injuries sustained in Afghanistan.  I mentioned to him this was a "cost of doing business"......

I realized this morning that it is a cost you have paid, not me.  I am sorry I diminished/devalued you and all the others.

I am sorry.

Take Care

You are right though; it is the cost of doing business... but the business is freedom.  I don't think your intent was to diminish or devalue soldiers anymore than a civilian company can diminish or devalue their general labour workers. Its a requirement to do business.

The beauty of our army is that it is 100% voluntary.  I knew, as much as any other soldier going over, the risks involved.
People don't volunteer to be put in harms way unless they weigh the risks and believe in the goal / cause.. even if it's subconscious.

You don't have to appologise (especially to me). It seems asthough you've reached an understanding with youself about your own comments, seeing how you feel about them. So its all on you to forgive yourself.  I'm not offended.

Thanks for your candor on the subject and your support for our troops.

Cheers,

- Piper

 

[ProudDaughter]

Dear Piper,

My Dad sent me the link to your post this morning with the following instructions:  "Read...understand why the Regiment is so important to a soldier."  After reading your post, I now have a better understanding of what my Dad has talked about my whole life.  "My regimental family is the Queen's Own Rifles. That connection remains alive 40 yrs later..."  Now I understand why. 
I felt I needed to register with this website so that I could have the opportunity to say "THANK YOU".  As most people have already stated, I know those words are small but they come from the bottom of my heart and everyone else who types them.  I will be sharing your post with my Brownie unit and the rest of my Guiding district.
Please know that you and everyone else who is serving and has served are in my thoughts and prayers.  Without brave people like you I would not be sitting here and enjoying the freedoms I have and take for granted every day.
God speed Piper and I wish you a full recovery. 

 

[ProPatria Mike]

Greetings from Niagara Falls from a fellow Royal Canadian, Piper.

I read your post with great interest and understand all to well the decisions that must be made after being air evacuated from an operational theatre and the kick in the goobers feelings one has when one is cut out of the loop. For me, it was in an another, less important period of our Regimental history. 

Hell of a position to be put in, eh?

I suppose the issue could be resolved by posing and answering a pair of simple questions questions to yourself.

And be honest.

Am I fit as are my brothers?

Are my combat skills equal to theirs?

I think if the answer is yes to both questions, well, brother, tallyho!

If not, the potential of being, medically, the weak link in the chain in a combat situation cannot be ignored and, regrettably, the time for patience is at hand. Besides, the state of the world has gone wacko, the chances of another trip into the combat zone is certainly probable.

Hey, I was a piper for a brief spell in 3RCR shortly after the battalion returned to europe in 79. Good times, although, to be fair, it was a cold day in hell when the pipe major would allow me to parade without plugs in the chanter.... snicker.

Pro Patria, brother. Keeep and well.

 

[rmacqueen]

Yesterday I was speak to a co-worker and he commented on how I must be happy I was not in any more.  I informed him I had thought of getting back in.  He seemed surprised and mentioned the deaths and injuries sustained in Afghanistan.

I get that as well and have also felt the tug to get back in to do my part.  Those who have never been a part of the Regimental family do not understand what it is like nor do they understand what it is like to do something meaningful with your life.  The men and women of the CF are serving the cause of freedom and security for the entire country, to help improve the lives of people in other countries and, not to sound melodramtic, to help bring stabiltiy to the entire planet.  Someone who has never done anything more than work for the betterment of corporate profits cannot understand the pull of being involved, shoulder to shoulder, with your fellow soldier.

This is the reason that we, as part of the military family, stand together and support one another.  I am thankful that we have people like piper to represent us in these trying times and I am proud of them, we could not ask for better.

 

[Bin Rat]

 
Bravo Zulu; Job Well Done

Brother, keep spreading the word. Yours is one of the stories Canadians need to hear to really understand the world as it truly is and what it takes to play a leadership role in making a positive difference. Politicians talk, soldiers act. Keep your head high for you have walked the walk. Thank You.


Dan
OSONS

 

[RangerRay]

RHFC_piper, and others serving or have served in Afghanistan,

I don't know what to say, other than thank you and everyone else in Afghanistan for your service.

Though not in the same way as you, I feel the guilt of being at home.  Although I have been out of the militia for almost 10 years, I can't help but feel guilty that I am here at home comfortable, can enjoy the night out at a pub, or whatever, while half a world away, this Dominion's best men and women are fighting evil and dealing with hardships that I will never know.

I am proud to call you countrymen (and women!).  Though you may not hear it much, you are the best examples of what this Dominion has to offer.  Don't let anyone else tell you otherwise.

I wish I was there.

 

[Amos]

Hello Piper...thank you for sharing your feelings and experience.  What an emotional read.  There are no words to express my gratitude to you and past and present war vets....you are one of a kind.  I thought I only had one hero in my life, my dad, now I have many, present company included.  My dad was a WWII vet, Carleton & York Regiment, Italian Campaign (machine gunner)....he was one of the fortunate ones to make it back home.  He is now up in heaven with his brothers. 
You and all your brothers and sisters will be in my prayers on Remembrance Day.  GOD BLESS YOU     

 

[gnplummer421]

Piper, Thank you.

Your post was very powerful and heartfelt. I have posted a copy of it on our bulletin board here at our plant in Brockville. A lot of folks have asked me questions about why you are so passionate about going back and the need to finish the job with your brothers.(even though I thought you explained that quite well) Although I am an ex-soldier, I was never exposed to combat, so I said that I was not really qualified to respond to the questions they asked.

I did tell them that all our soldiers are very brave, and that we all owe a great deal of gratitude to our troops in Afghanistan fighting for what we believe is a good fight, that we are making a difference in the lives of the Afghani people, and that you are conducting yourselves with distinction and professionalism.

We do have people here who do not understand, and want us out. These people generally are not well informed, and I'm working hard to get them to do some research and to talk to serving members for answers. I tell them everybody has the right to an opinion, just make sure it is an informed opinion.

Gnplummer421

 

[Pesky672]

Piper,

Thank you.

I received a copy of your letter via email today and began to read it.
That was a mistake.  The "mick" in me was overwhelmed so I had to close it and send it home.  The troops can't see me weep.

I don't know you but, I did know 3 of the men mentioned in your passages from the time when I was posted to 1 RCR as a Medic. A flood of memories appeared when I saw them on the news.
To be honest I have known (at least casually) about half the fellows we have lost in Afghanistan so far. Beginning with "King Marco" from Jump Coy 3VP.

You are absolutely correct though. 

It is about family and of all the Regiments that I have served, the Royals foster that feeling the best.  Regardless of trade all are brought into the fold.  I left that Regiment 12 years ago but still find Royals and the reciprocal loyalty that they inspire...wherever I go. 

Charles Coy (never Charlie) was at that time known to be the friendliest in the Battalion and I used to be up half the night dumping off the dozen or so cups of coffee that would be forced upon me when I did my evening rounds.

You really have forged a life time bond with these people and that alone is something to be truly proud of.
Count yourself among the blessed.
Nothing can bring us together like shared hardship, angry shots and the small kindnesses shared between brothers in arms and the Regiment...but, you already know that. 
That "belonging"....IS an amazing feeling...indescribable.  Feel sorry for those who have never known it.

We know..the Regiment knows...what no one else does. 
We fight for our friends....the guy next to you.  Not Mom, not the flag or the nation at least not really... 
You fight for that smelly, sloppy, card cheat who is right there...next to you.  Your brother.

I watch the news, anxious to spot a friend...to know that they are...at least for now....safe.  All the while fearing the announcement that I have lost another member of my family. This is un-ending for me having spent so much time in the brigades.  I have several families now although 1 RCR will always be my 1st family.

I to feel guilty for not being there with them.  Twice now my position has been chopped and it is frustrating. 
My family and those I work with who have never experienced the sense of belonging that only a Regiment can provide do not understand.  My wife tries... knowing that I will be inconsolable if I do not go but, in the end she can only pretend to understand.  I just tell them that my friends my Regiment need me...they are dying.... people are killing them....I need to help. 

Survivor guilt...it's a bugger...and is apparently not bound by time or distance.

Just don't let it consume you.  The boys know how you feel and for them that is enough.  Trust me. They to would all feel the same way as you do.

Soon, it will be Remembrance Day.  We all dread the date a bit more each year although we will never miss it. 
For my part I thank God that I am an NCO now.  From my position on parade...no one will see me cry.

Thank you again....you said it best.
We are all proud of you....the stuff that Regiments are made of.
Good Luck,God Bless and...

Never Pass a Fault.

Pro Patria!!



Pesky672

 

[ProPatria Mike]

Well said, pesky.... From a former member of the First and Finest, Pro Patria!

                               

 

[vonGarvin]

Love that photo, Mike.  I stood vigil on it on 11 November back in 92 or 93.  That was at its old place on by Skunk's Hollow.  I have to admit, though, it seems to fit better where it is now.

 

[2-3-Bravo]

Hey Piper.

Thank you for sharing. Don’t ever feel that your experiences should be shelved in a shoe box in some dark closet… for your own mental health and recovery, you need to get it out and we need to hear it. Canadians are proud of our soldiers and their sacrifices… damn proud – because most of them could never do a 10’th of what you’ve done.

That said, keep your chin up. You are not alone. I lost buddies too and like you, I feel the same guilt – Sgt. Ingram and Cpl. Gomez were brothers of mine.

Feel no shame! Chin up! Soldier on! Cry & scream if you need to… otherwise you’ll rot from the inside out.

Airborne!

Vince

 

[SealofZanza]

I don't even know what to say Piper. All I can say is thank you. Thank you and not only you but everyone over there. I leave next week for BMQ as a Reg Force Infanty Soldier and I can only say thank you for fueling the fire and desire I have to help.

I wish you the best in your recovery.

God Bless

Evan

 

[PteGDD]

I don't even know where to start.  That was a powerful, powerful read.  Though is shows how dangerous other walks of earth is, it builds motivation inside me.  From reading about your experiences, it makes me want to be there.  It makes me want to do my part. 

Thanks Piper
Your experience shared is greatly appreciated.

 

[Spooks]

I may not know combat but I will relate to the feeling that you have no closure and maybe it is also with you, but your life is seemingly on pause while you recover. How it may be a little bubble inside the hospital while the world continues on its way. How no mater how many people ask you how you are doing, you always answer the same way despite what you may feel. How people you don't even know may visit, but the only connection you have with them is the fact they wear the same uniform as you do/did.

Hang in there, because no matter how slow life may be once you are consciously awake, it is going nonetheless. It has been 9 months and 11 days since I had to return home before I was supposed to 'punch out'. It has been long and stupid at times, but I think it has taught me to be a better person. I myself, want to go back much to the disdain of those around me. -I- want to go back, because -I- want to finish the job that I started.

Now you get to help the wounded soldiers coming back, the grieving familtes of those who are lost, and pay tribute to those who have passed.

 

[maverick_brent]

Piper,
I personally cannot say i understand what your going through. I wont high jack such an inspiring and emotional thread, I hope to someday I know the bond that is forged, not through training, or spending time with troops, but to see each other facing death, facing peril, but knowing in your hearts it is what needs to be done, after re-enlisting to the reserves, im hoping to be going on the next task force.(Ro31)...Alot of guys ask.."why, would you want to go overseas, into the fighting, into all that shit"...i tell them.."cause its something that has to be done, somebodys gotta do the job.." i realize now, its not because the job has to be done, or even the fact that i can do the job and want to, its because of men like yourself, and the men before you, and the men after...you are the reason why i decided to join the military, your the reason i proudly wear a poppy, your the reason why i always notice a persons Canadian flag not flying half mast remembering the fallen. Thank you...all of you, for the inspiration, the dedication, loyalty, and perserverence in something taht many have no sight, or lost sight of. I hope someday i can pay my debt to you and this society for alywas losing sight of what you have given myself, and my children to come, i hope someday i can honor your service in a way that we both understand and respect. Get well soon soldier.

"Semper Fi"

maverick_brent

 

[englishmuffin]

RHFC_piper,
My thoughts echo much of what has been posted. As piper, I am intrigued as to what tunes you played in the Panjwai valley and how they were chosen. I apologise if this has already been gone over however I don't have the time presently to go through 6 pages of posts.

 

[Kirkhill]

RHFC_piper,
My thoughts echo much of what has been posted. As piper, I am intrigued as to what tunes you played in the Panjwai valley and how they were chosen. I apologise if this has already been gone over however I don't have the time presently to go through 6 pages of posts.

There you go Pipey.  You've joined ranks with Piper Findlater. 

 

[George Wallace]

RHFC_piper,
My thoughts echo much of what has been posted. As piper, I am intrigued as to what tunes you played in the Panjwai valley and how they were chosen. I apologise if this has already been gone over however I don't have the time presently to go through 6 pages of posts.

englishmuffin

Try this Link: Piper's lament at ramp ceremonies - what's it called?