The Military Wedding Superthread- merged

[PMedMoe]

Oh no its SHOE WARS..........

;D  Not quite.  Just means anytime I have worn pumps while in uniform, I've been dressed improperly.   

 

[Cansky]

Me too, I have been improperly dressed as was pointed out to me at the last mess dinner. 

According to annex E5-2 para 10 "pumps black or (navy) white.  Civilian plain patterned, leather or patent leather, oval vamp, closed toe and heel, displaying no decorative features and with a standard (not spiked or wedged) heel approximately 5cm (2 in) in height."

Good luck finding something to fit this criteria.

 

[my72jeep]

I know two Members that swear by the old Oxfords(Grany Boots), They say it makes them look more authoritarian.

 

[PMedMoe]

Me too, I have been improperly dressed as was pointed out to me at the last mess dinner. 

According to annex E5-2 para 10 "pumps black or (navy) white.  Civilian plain patterned, leather or patent leather, oval vamp, closed toe and heel, displaying no decorative features and with a standard (not spiked or wedged) heel approximately 5cm (2 in) in height."

Good luck finding something to fit this criteria.

My pumps fit that criteria.  I would have asked where does it state "rounded toe".  :stirpot:  Rounded and closed are two different terms.  Must have been the fashion police...  ;D

I know two Members that swear by the old Oxfords(Grany Boots), They say it makes them look more authoritarian.

:-X  No thanks.  I don't even know where mine are! 

 

[H11F]

Good Day,

My google-fu has brought me to this thread, which I figured I’d continue rather than starting something fresh.
On Thanksgiving weekend I proposed, and we are now beginning the process of wedding planning.  I’m a Captain with The RCR, she is now in ROTP to become a LogO.  Her two sisters were wed in Halifax, and while we are in Fredericton, I’ve been contemplating Halifax as well since her family is there and it’ll be easy to draw on them for (service) support.

I’ve been to Juno Towers a few times, including the Bridge once, and thought it was a rather nice place.  I know that members of the CAF are, typically, honourary guests at messes on other CAF bases and installations, but I’m not sure how it would apply at this time.

I’ve emailed the mess manager and function co-ordinator and am awaiting a reply, but I was curious if anyone has been to a wedding at Juno Towers and could comment? Or could comment on the facilities themselves? I’ve been to a wedding at RA Park and I know that they provided the food and such directly from that mess, as opposed to requiring caterers.  Again, I’ve sent email and am sure I’ll get a response; however, I put it out here asking from anyone that attended a wedding there, or had a wedding there, if they could give me an idea / feedback on the event.

Thanks,

H11F.

 

[Pusser]

Actually CAF member are not honorary "guests" in other messes, they are honorary "members," but whether that helps you may depend on the mess management.  For the most part, however, you should be able to get what you are asking for, as long as you get your reservation in on time and of course, pay the appropriate fees.  I can't comment on the current situation, but I can say that a number of years ago, I was able to book the RA Park mess for my in-laws' 50th wedding anniversary.  At the time I was actually posted to Ottawa and was deployed OUTCAN (such fun it is to organize a party via email!).  Other points:

Both Juno Tower and RA Park have their own kitchens and (as far as I know) staff, so their should be no need for outside caterers

Both the Wardroom and RA Park are the same mess

RA Park is actually an excellent facility for a reception.  I was married in the Basilica around the corner and so it was a very convenient location (and the Wardroom was booked).  I also booked it for my sister-in-law's wedding (for which the only military connection was that her sister was married to me), and the aforementioned 50th Anniversary party.  I've also found that messes are much more flexible when organizing dinners, receptions, etc.  You can generally get whatever you want and they tend to go the extra mile when it comes to special requests and of course, military tradition. 

 

[mike63]

When I got married to my wife in 1987 (yes still together after all these years), she told me that there was no way we were going to get married in my uniform.  As a military brat herself, she knew that there would be many things that she would have to put up with that the military was going to throw at us.  She said that she was marrying me and not the military.  I wasn't going to start off our life together by arguing about something like that because, I knew somewhere down the line, I would screw something up that I would have to defend against(pick your battles). It took me years to understand what she was saying but...in the end, I got it.

 

[H11F]

Actually CAF member are not honorary "guests" in other messes, they are honorary "members," but whether that helps you may depend on the mess management.  For the most part, however, you should be able to get what you are asking for, as long as you get your reservation in on time and of course, pay the appropriate fees.  I can't comment on the current situation, but I can say that a number of years ago, I was able to book the RA Park mess for my in-laws' 50th wedding anniversary.  At the time I was actually posted to Ottawa and was deployed OUTCAN (such fun it is to organize a party via email!).  Other points:

Both Juno Tower and RA Park have their own kitchens and (as far as I know) staff, so their should be no need for outside caterers

Both the Wardroom and RA Park are the same mess

RA Park is actually an excellent facility for a reception.  I was married in the Basilica around the corner and so it was a very convenient location (and the Wardroom was booked).  I also booked it for my sister-in-law's wedding (for which the only military connection was that her sister was married to me), and the aforementioned 50th Anniversary party.  I've also found that messes are much more flexible when organizing dinners, receptions, etc.  You can generally get whatever you want and they tend to go the extra mile when it comes to special requests and of course, military tradition.

Pusser,

Thanks for the feedback.  My fiancee's sister did the reception at RA Park this last summer, and it was certainly fun.  Also, apparently, one of the larger bar tabs they'd seen in a while! Oh well, I was having fun ;o)

Thanks for the clarification on guest vice member, I will certainly consider this.  I received a quick email back, though it only provides a small amount of feedback (ref the price per plate), so I will certainly put out a few more RFIs.

I will have to ask about having access to what I believe is called the Bridge, as it wasn't mentioned in the email!

I know there is a church on the base, but I'm not sure that is the route to go.  I will see what SHE wants )

 

[Miss.P]

I'm not sure where to ask this and I'm just curious, but would it be permitted for a female service member to wear a traditional white dress on her wedding day but also with her dress uniform jacket? Thanks in advance

 

[Lumber]

I'm not sure where to ask this and I'm just curious, but would it be permitted for a female service member to wear a traditional white dress on her wedding day but also with her dress uniform jacket? Thanks in advance

At the same time? No. Your uniform jacket is a military uniform and must be worn in accordance with CAF Dress Regulations. There is no chapter or paragraph that allows you to wear a 1A or Mess Dress jacket over top of a civilian dress.

Now, if you're having a private wedding at a civilian location with only a couple other people in the military there, is anyone going to say anything and make a big fuss about it? ....

Does anyone ever say anything about all the people wearing kilts and other highland regalia with their mess dress, even those the dress committee minutes specifically looked at this and said no? ....

 

[Journeyman]

Now, if you're having a private wedding at a civilian location with only a couple other people in the military there, is anyone going to say anything and make a big fuss about it? ....

Anyone with fashion sense will likely say "WTF?!"

Does anyone ever say anything about all the people wearing kilts and other highland regalia with their mess dress, even those the dress committee minutes specifically looked at this and said no? ....

"Kilts and other highland regalia" are an approved part  of some Regiment's Mess dress; it's not like some folks arbitrarily decided to wear a Catholic school girl's plaid miniskirt with their Mess Kit.


...OK, maybe some sailors on weekends 

 

[Lumber]

Anyone with fashion sense will likely say "WTF?!"

I was thinking that but didn't want to say it...lol

"Kilts and other highland regalia" are an approved part  of some Regiment's Mess dress; it's not like some folks arbitrarily decided to wear a Catholic school girl's plaid miniskirt with their Mess Kit.

I was more referring to the numerous mess dinners I've been to where senior naval officers wear their family kilt's with their mess dress. The dress regs say no, and the mess committee says no, but who am I to tell a Capt(N) that he's out of dress when half the room is wearing non-regulation Quebec-City sashes and seal-skin bow ties.

 

[Journeyman]

I was more referring to the numerous mess dinners I've been to where senior naval officers wear their family kilt's with their mess dress. The dress regs say no, and the mess committee says no, but who am I to tell a Capt(N) that he's out of dress when half the room is wearing non-regulation Quebec-City sashes and seal-skin bow ties.

My "sailors on weekends" comment was tongue-in-cheek -- I didn't realize it was a legitimate issue. 

 

[Lumber]

My "sailors on weekends" comment was tongue-in-cheek -- I didn't realize it was a legitimate issue.

I wouldn't so much call it a "legitimate issue" as a perk of promotion to senior rank.  ;D

 

[Fishbone Jones]

I was thinking that but didn't want to say it...lol

I was more referring to the numerous mess dinners I've been to where senior naval officers wear their family kilt's with their mess dress. The dress regs say no, and the mess committee says no, but who am I to tell a Capt(N) that he's out of dress when half the room is wearing non-regulation Quebec-City sashes and seal-skin bow ties.

Anyone with fashion sense will likely say "WTF?!"
"Kilts and other highland regalia" are an approved part  of some Regiment's Mess dress; it's not like some folks arbitrarily decided to wear a Catholic school girl's plaid miniskirt with their Mess Kit.


...OK, maybe some sailors on weekends 

Oh, you two stop it  :slapfight:

 

[Loachman]

I was more referring to the numerous mess dinners I've been to where senior naval officers wear their family kilt's with their mess dress.

Full-length kilts, though, confirm?

 

[Lumber]

Full-length kilts, though, confirm?

If by full-length you mean right at the knee, as kilt's are supposed to be worn, then yes. Along with the high socks, sgian, and sporran.

 

[Pusser]

I'm not sure where to ask this and I'm just curious, but would it be permitted for a female service member to wear a traditional white dress on her wedding day but also with her dress uniform jacket? Thanks in advance

The Dress Manual has a specific section that states that the mixing of uniform and civilian clothing is prohibited, with the exception of certain items (e.g. shoes, gloves,etc), which by themselves are not identifiable as military.

If you want to add a military flair to your wedding dress, you may find something in the jewelry section at Canex.  Certain badges (e.g. pilot's wings) are sometimes available as "sweetheart broaches,"* which could look nice on a wedding dress, provided that wearing that is appropriate in the first place (i.e. don't wear pilot's wings just because you're in the air force).  Although sweetheart broaches are normally for sweethearts, if there is a version of one for a badge you've actually earned, I can't see anything wrong with wearing it yourself.

The practice of giving "sweetheart broaches" began during the First World War when aircrew began having jewelled versions of their wings made into broaches for their sweethearts to wear.  Note that the women wearing them were NOT aircrew - they wore the badge of their boyfriend/husband.  The practice continues to this day (especially in the UK) and you do occasionally see these broaches at Canex.  This is the only instance where it is considered socially acceptable for someone to wear a badge, which they themselves have not actually earned.  I have heard of cases where members have been having sets of their miniatures made for their wives/girlfriends to wear on formal occasions.  That is most definitely NOT appropriate!

 

[Pusser]

I was more referring to the numerous mess dinners I've been to where senior naval officers wear their family kilt's with their mess dress. The dress regs say no, and the mess committee says no, but who am I to tell a Capt(N) that he's out of dress when half the room is wearing non-regulation Quebec-City sashes and seal-skin bow ties.

I think it's sad that the Dress Committee turned down the proposal to allow kilts.  I think it looks pretty sharp.  It's also a common and accepted practice in the RN.  In fact, it's specifically permitted within their dress regulations.  Sometimes I think the Dress Committee has too much of a, "I don't want to wear that optional item; therefore, no one else should be allowed to," attitude.  Furthermore, why bother trying to outlaw something that folks are going to do anyway?

 

[Lumber]

I think it's sad that the Dress Committee turned down the proposal to allow kilts.  I think it looks pretty sharp.  It's also a common and accepted practice in the RN.  In fact, it's specifically permitted within their dress regulations.  Sometimes I think the Dress Committee has too much of a, "I don't want to wear that optional item; therefore, no one else should be allowed to," attitude.  Furthermore, why bother trying to outlaw something that folks are going to do anyway?

My thoughts exactly! There weren't even any comment in the minutes of the meeting, just simply:

"4.      Wearing of Kilts with Mess Dress: RCN CPO indicated that there was no intention to move forward on the wearing of Kilts with Mess Dress, an item brought forward at the June NDC meeting; this matter is now closed."

So why turn it down? It's really sharp, and their are instructions for wearing kilts in the dress regs (army, albeit), so it shouldn't be an issue!