Four things you dont want to hear...

[Sh0rtbUs]

I swiped this off a british Army forum. It relates to them, but it seems to apply here in canada as well.. ;D

1. A Sergeant saying, "Trust me Sir....

2. A Lieutenant saying, "Based on my experience...

3. A Captain saying, "I was just thinking....

4. A Warrant Office saying, "Watch this ****....

 

[Spr.Earl]

Yup it work's on our side to LOL 

 

[Armymedic]

I'll at two more..

1. A Pte saying "I know exactly how to do that",  :
2. Your CO saying "these next couple days will be challenging in a way you've never experienced before." 

 

[Michael Dorosh]

I'll at two more..

1. A Pte saying "I know exactly how to do that",  :

And the last half of the sentence "...because they showed us how in Army Cadets."

 

[jswift872]

there is this guy in my bmq who after a lecture from our warrant officer said "warrant i have something i can add to that"


well, didn't warrant fly into him..lol

 

[NavyGrunt]

That reminds me-

There was this one SGT in my BMQ who kept being called MCPL and it was driving him crazy. He was a serious dude and didnt joke much.

When it came time to teach us the ranks he was going over it and the 3 chevrons came up. His eyes widened and he cracked a smile, he turned to us and said jokingly "who knows what the fuck rank this is". Everyone chuckled and I put my hand up.

"Go ahead Ropetech"

"Thats easy", I replied " Thats obviously a SGT, everyone knows that MCPL"

I think fire almost shot out of his ass. He called "Gas,Gas,Gas" every 30 seconds for the next 10 weeks and I was always doing pushups. However it was worth it because the standards PO at the back burst out laughing and then so did the rest of the class.

 

[Sundborg]

lmao    ;D  That's funny!

 

[Long in the tooth]

I'd like to add the obvious -

"I'm from HQ/Div/Bde and I'm here to help you"!

 

[291er]

A Pte saying "I learned this in basic......."

 

[CDNsig]

My favourites from the senior leadership... :

"we have to think outside the box..."
"this will improve overall quality of life in the CF..."
"do more with less..."
"ASD will cost less and be more efficient..."
"the Forces are overstretched and can't do any more deployments for ----- months/years..."
(in other words, pack, we are going on another UN mission... ;D)

 

[Eric5]

" Thats obviously a SGT, everyone knows that MCPL"

LOL So funny. I hope I'm able to keep my mouth shut during basic this summer. I usually tend to have alot of smart *** comments that get me in trouble.

 

[Sundborg]

We had this one guy on our platoon who failed the inspections part of the course; hence, he was sent to PAT.  Anyways, on PAT, one day he couldn't find his Combat Jacket, so he manages to find his MCpls jacket and takes it.  Later on, the MCpl reported the jacket stolen and the MP's were all into the investigation.  The MP's finally came up to this guy and found out he had the jacket, still with the shoulder flahses on, after the MCpl was looking high and low for it.  So the MP's asked him why he had his, and all he could say was "Well...  I couldn't find mine"  :  lol

So from then on everytime we saw the guy we called him Mcpl.

 

[ags281]

all he could say was "Well...   I couldn't find mine"  

I'm speechless.

 

[Rick Goebel]

And a thing you don't want to see.

I was the last one to leave the mess some years ago and the only parka left had 2Lt slipons on it.  This wasn't too bad for me but it must have been a shock for the 2Lt when he got home and saw LCol slipons on "his" parka.

I got it back the next week with a bottle of Scotch in the pocket.

 

[Bruce Monkhouse]

Thats not bad Rick, maybe it was the same 2Lt who "forgot" the layout and got my gasmask and since I was the radop in the CP [therefore last out] I had to grab the only one left...just a size or two too small for this melon.
No scotch but a free ride with the medic to clean air!

 

[Drummie]

I'll at two more..

1. A Pte saying "I know exactly how to do that",   :

And the last half of the sentence "...because they showed us how in Army Cadets."

Hey hey!  "mess with cadets, die like the rest"...or something like that.

Anywho, If it was anything other then drill, I would concur, but drill......we rule all  ;D
Acer Acerpori

 

[Gunnerlove]

I am far past being sick of hearing,

"We have the finest kit in the world"

 

[Pugnacious]

"Anywho, If it was anything other then drill, I would concur, but drill......we rule all"

That's because that is all there is to do in Cadets...that, and tie knots...well 3 knots over and over again.

Way back when I was in the Navy Cadets (big mistake) I remember...
Having mismatched drumsticks.
Par for the course as I had no drum to use.
Having to share the same piece of practice wood with its little leather square to play on.
A CO that ALLWAYS smelled of Booze.
Being bullied, and run over by the regular forces at Rememberance day marches.
And cont' and never ending 'duck walks' , and marches up and down the stupid hall.

Bonus was after 2 years of marching, and learning more in our off time in Cub Scouts our 'big day' was watching a stupid fishing boat launch.   Wooo hooo!

Mean while next door the Army Cadets got to go all sorts of cool places, and do some neat stuff.
A real nice taste for how things are in the Navy side of the CF.

Sorry to digress...I need the therapy.  ;D

Cheers!
P.

 

[OLD SCHOOL]

In the early days in Cornwallis...
Co's inspection and he asked me why I thought I was going to join 'his' infantry regiment if I lived.
I considered for a moment and then made the RSM drop his jaw when I replied to the CO who came up to my chin...
"well sir, I obviously made the height rquirement so I know I'm in!"   ;D

 

[Marauder]

"This next ex will be MUCH better than the last few"
"You'll get these pants back in about two weeks"
"Everyone who wants it will get summer employment"
"You'll have plenty of ammo"
"The forecast says clear and sunny all weekend"
"That'll be cleared from your charge card since we screwed it up"