The Military Wedding Superthread- merged

[FlyingDutchman]

OK, I'll weigh in on this as a naval officer, who got married in uniform, has attended uniform weddings and has actually researched the subject:

1)  You do not need permission to get married in uniform.  You're a member of the CF.  You're allowed to wear your uniform on appropriate occasions.

While we're on the subject, what other occasions would be considered appropriate occasions?

 

[mariomike]

While we're on the subject, what other occasions would be considered appropriate occasions?

I don't know what the rules are, but when our father passed away, I asked my sister to wear her uniform because I know he was very proud of her.

 

[Pusser]

An annendum to point 4) If the ceremony is before 1800, wear high collar whites. Because, hey, what other bloody situation are you ever going to find where they'll be appropriate?

Except that the OP seems to be saying that he's getting married on Friday, 28 October, which fall in the winter dress period.  You can't wear whites in the winter dress period unless you're in the tropics.  High collar whites are not an option for an October wedding in Canada.

 

[gcclarke]

Except that the OP seems to be saying that he's getting married on Friday, 28 October, which fall in the winter dress period.  You can't wear whites in the winter dress period unless you're in the tropics.  High collar whites are not an option for an October wedding in Canada.

Curses. Foiled again by a LogO pulling a regulation out of his back pocket! And yes, of course, silly me.

 

[Danjanou]

..... I'm getting married this coming Friday.....

Now maybe it's just me but I think this is the crucial part of the post. All these niggly little details should already have been worked out long ago, especially in light of Mr. Campbell's sound and sage advice re the Brides edicts  er wishes.

If not I'd be going with Journeyman's suggestions.  8)

 

[Pusser]

Curses. Foiled again by a LogO pulling a regulation out of his back pocket! And yes, of course, silly me.

That's who I am.  It's what I do.    :nod:

 

[Haggis]

My advice, grab her, run to Vegas, find a drive through chapel, and wear what ever she wants.

Maybe Journeyman can loan you a motorcycle.  Then, wear whatever you want - but bring the sword.  8)

Yes, I'm from NDHQ - and I'm here to help.

 

[ballz]

Now maybe it's just me but I think this is the crucial part of the post. All these niggly little details should already have been worked out long ago, especially in light of Mr. Campbell's sound and sage advice re the Brides edicts  er wishes.

If not I'd be going with Journeyman's suggestions.  8)

I was MC for a wedding July 30. About 1800 on July 29 the bride kicked me out of the B&G's house when she learned the groom still hadn't written his vows... to the tune of "and take the god d**m rum with you!"

 

[Blatchman]

(the sword is not hooked up, but rather carried in the left hand - if the sword is drawn, then you can hook up the scabbard, again, under the tunic).

Is it acceptable to hook up the sword briefly while exchanging rings?

Hoisting a garland of evergreens from your ship's yardarm on the day of the ceremony is traditional and cool!

What if you are currently attached to a shore posting?

I ask these questions as I too am taking the plunge next year and have done some research into this, these are the only questions I have yet answered or confirmed my thoughts.

 

[Edward Campbell]

Is it acceptable to hook up the sword briefly while exchanging rings?

What if you are currently attached to a shore posting?

I ask these questions as I too am taking the plunge next year and have done some research into this, these are the only questions I have yet answered or confirmed my thoughts.

I'll leave someone else to deal with Navy swords - in the Army, back when I was a junior officer and the earth was still cooling, most people left their swords hang for the few moments it too to exchange rings, kisses, etc.

If your shore establishment, the unit to which you belong, has the right sort of flag pole - the one with bits of wood and lots of ropes attached  - then I'm guessing that the garland should be hung there. Right. sailors?

 

[OldSolduer]

I'll leave someone else to deal with Navy swords - in the Army, back when I was a junior officer and the earth was still cooling, most people left their swords hang for the few moments it too to exchange rings, kisses, etc.

If your shore establishment, the unit to which you belong, has the right sort of flag pole - the one with bits of wood and lots of ropes attached  - then I'm guessing that the garland should be hung there. Right. sailors?

Did ye utter the word "Sword"? Arrrrrrrrr mateys!! Wherrre's the rum?

 

[Edward Campbell]

Did ye utter the word "Sword"? Arrrrrrrrr mateys!! Wherrre's the rum?

And the lash and the ... oh forget about it.

 

[Pusser]

Is it acceptable to hook up the sword briefly while exchanging rings?

What if you are currently attached to a shore posting?

I ask these questions as I too am taking the plunge next year and have done some research into this, these are the only questions I have yet answered or confirmed my thoughts.

Just let the sword hang while you do the ring thing (that's what I did).  While you certainly don't want to walk around with a sword hanging loose, you should be fine for the few seconds it takes to attach the ball and chain slip on the symbol of your love (unless there's a pirouette involved).

As for the garland, if you have an appropriate place to hoist it, great, but I wouldn't lose a lot of sleep over it.  It's a tradition, not a law.

 

[Pusser]

And the lash and the ... oh forget about it.

I'm confused.  Is there a problem with this?  It all seems perfectly natural to me.

 

[Cpo2 Burden]

Thanks for all the great feedback guys. In response to some of the posts, I don't have a sword yet, I've decided not to get one until I'm promoted same with the whites I'm also the only military person attending so no sword arch. My wife to be says as long as I wear pants she's happy it's more the mother of the bride that would make running off to Vegas a good idea, although going to Vegas is always a good idea.

 

[FlyingDutchman]

You don't like your (soon to be) in laws? Why do I seem to be the only person who likes their in laws?

 

[my72jeep]

You don't like your (soon to be) in laws? Why do I seem to be the only person who likes their in laws?

Hell I like my current ones great pair, but boy was the last pair, well her mom what a laugh a second basket nut case. good luck this weekend.

 

[Jimmy_D]

If that's the case, get you wife to be's father go rent a nickle plated shot gun, and get him to stand behind you the WHOLE CEREMONY. But for god sake's don't let him have any ammo. ;D

 

[Edward Campbell]

Thanks for all the great feedback guys. In response to some of the posts, I don't have a sword yet, I've decided not to get one until I'm promoted same with the whites I'm also the only military person attending so no sword arch. My wife to be says as long as I wear pants she's happy it's more the mother of the bride that would make running off to Vegas a good idea, although going to Vegas is always a good idea.

Best wishes and good luck to you and your bride. We all hope you have a great wedding and, more important, a happy life together. In the big scheme of things weddings are pretty small change, despite all the angst some endure. Have fun.

 

[Infanteer]

4)  Mess dress is NOT appropriate for a wedding unless the ceremony takes place after 1800.  If the ceremony takes place before 1800, you should wear N1 or N1A for the ceremony, but you can change to Mess Dress for the reception (if it occurs after 1800).  Don't even think about wearing a beret - that's just wrong on so many levels

It's funny, I rechecked and No.2 Mess Dress is still considered "evening dress" in the regulations in that it is only to be worn after 1800.  That being said, as Edward Campbell mentioned once, the old conceptions of dinner and dress are dying a proper death and Victorian norms are not really relevant.  A-AD-265-000 Is probably in need of a revision to reflect this.

I wore Mess Dress to my wedding and it started at noon.  I wore it because my Regiment does not have Full Dress and No.1 - being DEUs - simply looked too casual (even though it is prescribed for such an occasion) compared to my groomsmen who were wearing the civilian black tie equivlent of mess dress (black tie).  My Best Man was actually wearing Morning Dress throughout the event and into the evening because it looked slick and would have been silly (and costly) to have him change.  So, many faux pas that would have been inexcusable in Edwardian times, but in the end we all looked fine in the 21st century.

That being said, if our Army had an proper issue of Full Dress, then I would have worn it because it is sharp.  But that's just me.

Edit to add:  Here's a high-minded site if anyone cares about buttons and bows.

http://www.blacktieguide.com/index.html

Note:  The protocol of reserving the dinner jacket and tailcoat for wear after six is self-evident in Britain which has maintained the elegant custom of morning dress, a category of clothing designated specifically for formal daytime events.  On the other side of the Atlantic, however, formal day clothes have all but disappeared since World War II and in their absence most North Americans have come to view the tuxedo and tailcoat erroneously as all-purpose “formalwear” and commonly sport it at afternoon weddings.  Consequently, the proper use of evening wear has become a habit generally confined to the privileged minority that attend black-tie events often enough to view the tuxedo as an integral part of a man’s wardrobe rather than as a rented novelty.

Guess my wedding was just a low-class gathering of yokels with rented novelties...the horror!!!