The Rules for membership in the Man Club

[kratz]

We're all sorry Trin, we really are, but, we wanted to see if you would in fact go an do it, an you did 

It's not all bad. Think of all those soles you will save. 

 

[IN HOC SIGNO]

These rules all seem very straight forward to me and of course we all know them instinctively....there is very little reason to write them down.
The bathroom etiquette is very important.....it seems women's bathrooms are extremely chaotic...I've waited outside them for eons for my wife. It seems too like they have a rule about going two by two...is this the Noah rule or something?? ;D

 

[NL_engineer]

These rules all seem very straight forward to me and of course we all know them instinctively....there is very little reason to write them down.
The bathroom etiquette is very important.....it seems women's bathrooms are extremely chaotic...I've waited outside them for eons for my wife. It seems too like they have a rule about going two by two...is this the Noah rule or something?? ;D

:rofl:

 

[BernDawg]

29.  Rule no. 29 FOR CHRISSAKES!!!  How come not everyone gets this??  pizza doesn't hurt either.  Especially cause I have a truck.

 

[zipperhead_cop]

Found a great book today at Chapter's.
  "Everything Men know about women"
Unfortunately, the frakking thing was 400 pages of blank paper. :crybaby:

I got that book for Christmas.  You should have checked the last page.  It had one sentance that makes all the difference:

"They have boobs". 

 

[Shamrock]

I got it too, but I coloured in mine.

 

[armyvern]

Face it,

You guys can not figure out up from down without a list of rules to follow. That may explain the reasoni why I had 16 PMs about this thread from you guys out there. 16!! The best one being:

I agree with the rules, as a father myself.....I too am anal retentive. 

Now, he knows who he is. When a new member of the forum feels the need to assure me that he too is anal retentive...I rest my case.

Girls rule...boys drool.  ;D

 

[Yrys]

I had 16 PMs about this thread from you guys out there. 16!!

WoW! you sure are a popular gal !

 

[armyvern]

WoW! you sure are a popular gal !

Great looks and personality!! What else can I say? 

The volume of them (16!!) also explains why I will not be responding to a single one of them!!

 

[Yrys]

Great looks

From the picture contest, and

and personality!!

the DS Interview thread, I'm sure you're right .

The volume of them (16!!) also explains why I will not be responding to a single one of them!!

HEY! Aren't you suppose to be mothering the members here, as a DS  ?

 

[career_radio-checker]

30.) A Man must never own a cat or like his girlfriend's cat.

What if it's a tiger? Or better yet a couger? Bubbles had one of those, can I have one?

 

[armyvern]

HEY! Aren't you suppose to be mothering the members here, as a DS  ?

Obviously, you know me not at all!!  ;D

 

[Yrys]

Obviously, you know me not at all!!  ;D

IRK!!! My secret is tost into the day light!
I don't know YOU  :-X ! 

 

[armyvern]

IRK!!! My secret is tost into the day light!
I don't know YOU  :-X !   

Ahhh, it's quite all right!!
You are forgiven, for you are one who is just like me!!  ;D
There are no rules which pertain to us.

Except that:
We rule, boys drool.

 

[vonGarvin]

from my lovely daughters:
Boys go to Jupiter to get more Stupid-er
Girls go to Mars to get more chocolate bars


Oh, and my elder daughter reminded me that of the 8 mammals at our place last September, 7 are still living.  Of those 8, two were male, the remainder female.  The mammal that no longer lives?  The bull!  So, one male for force feeding and slaughtering, the other for, well, entertainment and abuse? 

Heck, even the "Girls Rule, Boys Drool" is a favourite of my younger daughter (only six years old)

 

[zipperhead_cop]

Except that:
We rule, boys drool.

See, you wimmins love tossing that out, but have never really taken the time to analyze that statement.

Girls Rule:
At a blush, it would seem an attractive thing.  Yet, any dictator can tell you that supreme leadership is a very tiresome task.  There is much planning and mental work that goes into it.  By default, that allows us men to enjoy ourselves and be more relaxed.  By your requirement to "rule" it creates a subordinate/supervisor relationship which, as any good Corporal can tell you, the troops can be a real pain in the ass when they want to be.  Thus, you foist upon yourselves an environment of angst and hardship. 
Further compounding this mental state, is that no one female can be the leader of all, thus competition becomes an issue.  In a never ending power struggle, the aspiring Vagtators try to find ways to bump out the competition with the tools of their trade; gossip, back stabbing, disloyalty, and cattiness.  As by and large the men are just annoyed and deterred by such tactic, other women take it genuinely to heart and then reply in kind.  Life long friendship bonds can be shredded with something as simple as an "I saw him first" urination contest.  Given such a brutal and unyielding environment, the Vagtator takes out her frustrations on the easy target--the man.  Not being as sharp, or in tune with the actual vitriol that he is being subjected to, the man "takes it" and can generally chalk the derision up to "guess she's just bitchy again".  Eventually though, the man will take his TV and skin mags, and leave.  Invariably, the woman will chalk up this experience as "all men are jerks".  The cycle of personal unaccountability being complete, the woman moves on to the next sucker partner.  Dominance is retained, but at a heavy toll. 

Boys Drool:
Drooling tends to be a characteristic of an inattentive state, or one of diminished caring.  It also is indicative of a state of euphoria and bliss.  As such, what a great way to be enmeshed.  Thus it is for the man.  Given the flurry of female angst that he is generally surrounded with, the man has developed a defensive mechanism to survive; the fugue state (AKA "TV Test Pattern Time).  When a woman is transitioning or is in the Vagtator state, the man will turn mentally inward and will cause his ears to only key on certain phrases, such as "Right?" or "is that okay?".  These can trigger the autonomic response of "Yup", typically accompanied by head nodding (the actual full verbal registration is demonstrated by Charles Schultz in his introspective social commentary "Peanuts" in the form of the "Charlie Brown Teacher Voice".  However, being married, Mr. Schultz deflected the female backlash by attributing it to the genderless teacher.  Through back channels, he let us know what it really was)  In reality, the male mind is a thousand miles away, in a special place filled with [MAN'S SPECIAL PLACE DETAILS REMOVED DUE TO OPEN PUBLIC FORUM SETTING AND ISSUES OF MANOPSEC]
Sometimes, if the mental departure is complete enough, a relaxing of the lower mandible does occur, and depending on the nature of the images of the mental departure, can cause excess salivation or "drool". 

I hope this adequately illustrates the direct linear relationship between Girls Rule: Boys Drool. 

So rule away, girls.  We can always use one more mental vacation.  Have fun! 

 

[armyvern]

ZC,

Operative words in all your wordiness were:

Girls Rule:

;

Boys Drool:

; and

Dominance is retained, but at a heavy toll.

As long as we're ruling, you're drooling, and dominance is maintained; I'm good with all the other stuff!!  ;D

 

[Yrys]

the aspiring Vagtators

You mean Dominatrix, right  ?

 

[Sig_Des]

:rofl:

Can we find a drool icon?

Hmm...like most relationships I've been in, Vern as taken a logical and well-written piece, and taken out the statements that she likes, or would make her appear to be right.

:warstory:

 

[GAP]

ZC,

Operative words in all your wordiness were:
;
; and


As long as we're ruling, you're drooling, and dominance is maintained; I'm good with all the other stuff!!  ;D

Whew,  glad that's explained..... I do like the explanation though.....  ;D